All Comments on 'The Sins of the Fathers Ch. 23'

I've been following your saga since it started. Most chapters are well-paced between dialog and narrative, but there have been a few "misses". This one was definitely a hit in that regard. Nicely done with the writing and character development. And nice twist with the implication that Jack may not actually be Nikki's father after all!

You'll know from my previous comments how hot I found them, this one is no different except for two things.

I got lost during the courtroom scene, possilby because I'm from the UK, where your classed as a 'fully legal' adult at the age of 18. Concesual sex is legal at 16., incest is still illigal. I know laws vary from state to state. I find it hard to comprehend how in one state something is legal and in the next, it might not.

The other area of confussion for me is the Father, Jen and Jack triangle folled by the Jen, Jack, Spencer over. Jack watching Dad fuck daughter in front of him, not feeling right with but not stopping it I can understand. I can't believe that Jack would give Jen to Spencer. I could believe it if Jen asked Jack to let her fuck Spencer, he then battled with it in his brain befor saying yes. Again maybe I;ve missed something or misunderstood previous chapters involing yhis triangle. Unless Jen knows that Jack allowed her to do what she wanted but afredwards felt guilty and blaned Jack for this and said that he gave her away. [Which jen in this chapter suggests isn't the case.

Nichole mentions looking at the wedding picture of Jen with Jack and her father's hands on her stomach. This looks like a real bombshell one that Nichole might not forgive either Jack or Jen for.

I believe, memory is malleable, and I have written it so.

Love and Sex between more than two people is at best confusing and subject to misinterpretation of motives and desires (even real time in-the-moment. Add to that memories ability to morph to what we want to believe happened rather than what really happened and you have a recipe for both selective memory and the blame game.

Finally, memories change over time. Couple tend to reinforce the common memories by repetition of retelling and reliving the stories of their lives. Separated couples lose that bond of shared memory. They drift! The stories and the realities shift with the memories. They gradually come to remember things differently. Their shared worlds diverge.

With threesomes and more-somes, I believe it is even more difficult to keep the shared memory precise.

I have tried to allow readers to 'see' from various character's eyes. The view is not the same from each vantage point. (If I have succeeded in writing it well).

In other words, the confusion you are feeling, (I hope) is a part of the underlying story told through memories, diaries, and flashbacks. I hope it does not distract from or lessen your enjoyment of the underlying tale.

Life is imprecise. Sex is a riot of imprecise feelings, inadequately expressed, and mixed in unspoken inner dialogues. We expect others to know how we felt even though we never said the words out loud. Confusion is love too!

Get back to Jack and Nikki now. We get the picture with Jennifer.

Jack and Nikki have already crossed the moral borders. It isn't forced.

Also, please lose Jessica. She lives with her parents, works in a theater and is as much of a "child" as Nikki. And she is a STRANGER in this group.

I like the way you occasionally tack away and then back to the main course. I've no experience with incest, but the way you write about it, maybe I missed something, "lusty grin." But your writing of threesomes was spot on. I know because I do have experience with that. The clash of fantasy with reality and all the doubt and fear, mixed with the satisfaction of a desire fulfilled. The acts themselves so extreme, so powerful, so addictive. The desire to repeat the acts in spite of the overwhelming sense of trepidation. Seems the same could be said for incest behaviors. That said, I anticipate your story continuing on to where I think, and hope that it will eventually go. Continue your journey sir, stay the course...

Jack and Spencer are single men desperately trying to do do the right thing with their mischievous and confused daughters. The gentlemen's girlfriends, especially Tammy, seem to have their heads on straight and are providing the guys with some relief from the girls.

You are back on track now. The story is the thing, continue writing the story. The part about Jennifer's father was very interesting considering what she said to the judge when she first took over the child's case. I found that interesting. "I Had A Father!" At the time I thought she meant he was a positive influence in her life. Now I know it was the exact opposite. Good job tying everything together. Continue writing the good story.

I get the distinct feeling that MAC is made out to be Nikki's "Gramps" with the controlling "you are mine" talk etc, she controls her father and friend to do things both of them like but none of them really choose.

So i guess we will find out Nikki is not her fathers daughter.

So is Nicole Jack's daughter or the grandpa's??????

Once again, the details matter. Dr, Sam is talking to NIKKI and yet the words are:

She reached over and took Mac's chin in her fingers, tilting Mac up for a kiss.

MAC is not there.

Thank you. Found, fixed, resubmitted. Will take a day or two to reset the story. Thanks again.

Definitely a mood breaker where it was located.

An incredibly hot incest story cum moral tale. I love a writer who makes me think almost as much as I love a writer who makes me feel.

This series is absolutely exceptional. Intensely sexual and intellectual at ther same time.

Can't wait to read all the chapters.

I think this series is easily up there with the very best of them your writing is intelligent and sympathetic to the occasion at all times np matter what or where that occasion might be you reflect the sensuality of the situation as well as the pathos, we human beings are complicated and you have imbued your characters with all facets . I Read this series when it first appeared I remember waiting impatiently for the next chapter to appear. Now I am just missing more updates I feel sure there must be some scope for a follow up. Either charting Nikki progress through uni or the progress of Jack and Jessica through life. But I am getting ahead of the story there is still a bit to go before chapter 30.