All Comments on 'The Slave of Dystonia Ch. 04'

Good to see this author continuing the series! Full of context and character, the true engines of eroticism in writing, focused on a *genuine* story about non-consensual slavery, rather than a three paragraph slide directly into "romantica". Looking forward to future chapters!

What a great chapter! Ah the ending makes me want more 😩 I CANT WAIT FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER!!!

I commented back when you were first writing that this story seems similar to the Rebellious Slave, but after reading this chapter it is just so obvious that you are clearly copying that story. I just didn't expect it to be so blatant. The whole scene where Emi realizes she wasn't whipped very hard, the introduction of another slave who was a military medic, Harper's mind games (aka mind fuckery), and some lines that Im pretty sure appear verbatim in TRS are just a couple of issues I have with this chapter. (the previous chapters also have a lot of borrowed material) I don't know what the rules are on literotica about plagiarism and Hispet21 seems to be on another hiatus so she probably won't see this but seriously if you're going to so explicitly copy a story at least just credit the original title and author.

I agree with Anon, it's totally obvious that you're stealing the premise of The Rebellious Slave, however, that's not quite enough to make me stop reading it. Writing the exact same story will make me stop reading. You can redeem yourself but only if you change it up, you've got a good story here and I really am enjoying it. We don't need another Arlington and Kara. Good luck!

I don't think it's intentional - you may not even be aware you're doing it, but there are clear examples of HisPet's work here.

I knew I wanted to write a story similar to TRS, but it's been honestly unintentional that I have used a lot of the same themes. I think the similarity comes from my love for that story (it's my favorite on the site). But if you all check my profile, you'll see that I am planning on rewriting the story. I just wanted to post this chapter to give you all a taste of where I was thinking the story would go. Obviously I need to change a few themes! Do you guys have any suggestions as to how I should change it to make it more individual? I would love the help... I want this story to be great for everyone reading it and sometimes it's hard to come up with new ideas when you are so inspired from a personal favorite. Thanks everyone for the feedback. It's greatly appreciated:)

This story has me hooked can't wait for the next chapter! & ignore all the negativity just because a story is similar doesn't mean you're "stealing" their ideas. There's obviously a whole bunch of stories that generate around this theme so just focus on you girl! Can't wait for more

So first off I vaguely remember reading this a couple of years ago and had a slight double-take upon seeing the update, really to see this continued, the writing is really solid with well flowing prose, a solid narative and at least a couple of interesting well rounded characters. So I guess with all that I mean welcome back, glad you continued this story :D

Things I liked; well I liked the mirror scene, it made sense and was a good character moment that showed how emotional our protagonist is. I also really liked Lacey, she's cute, has an interesting backstory with some nice characterisation and I have to admit I look forward to her and our protagonist playing together even if it's forced by their master. Also I'm really glad you gave us the disclaimer when she woke up about her whipping, the amount of times I read over the top punishments in stories of this genre is unreal and doesn't make much sense in context, I mean who spends a fortune on a slave to permanantly scar them 5 minutes later in routine punishments.

Things I liked, less; the whipping scene and to an extent the end scene felt a little much a little too quick, his expectations of behaviour for a new slave girl, especially one who he knows hates him on a fundamental level seem squewed. It can be hard to tell in these stories whether it's a calculated choice to start strict and soften over time, or whether it's just a hot-headed master, my hopes is that it's the former but it can be hard to tell so maybe something to keep in mind.

Still, really enjoyed the story, looking forward to reading more, keep up the good work :D

5/5 stars

p.s. don't let people drag you down with the comparisons to "The Reluctant Slave", the victorious lord master who takes a slave of his conquest is a long standing theme within the genre, and even if you have similar themes (which lets be honest there are only so many options) your writing style, narrative flow and story intentions make you distinct. Take the comparisons in stride and do right by your narrative and don't let the haters boss you around :D

p.p.s. everytime someone brings up "The Reluctant Slave" I remember how much I love it and also how much I hate it being left on the cliffhanger it was left on.

I'm enjoying your story immensely. Keep on writing the story as you know it needs to be. Well done.

Lmao its not just that the premise is the same or that there are similar themes. Its that there are literally the exact same scenes in the rebellious slave and certain descriptions that sound shockingly similar to it. Its still in the early stages so the author can salvage it. I really hope they turn it around and make it their own unique story.

Impressive !

I love your fiction and I hope you publish the following chapters quickly :)

I also like TRS, but your story deserves to be written and read ;)

I congratulate you and I encourage you to continue !

I'm looking forward to seeing more...

More?

Hope you update again soon

Please continue this.