All Comments on 'The Succubus'

Yeah, the dreaded "but" rears it's ugly head. Not too ugly though. =o)

Your story had excellent flow and build up. Here is the "but" of the critique... Read the story OUT LOUD, word for word, to the end. You will feel the flow of sentence structure and pick out spelling errors much more accurately than the word processor. The word "fee" appears when it should be "feel" instead. Fee is a word and thus not misspelled. Just a suggestion. Continue writing material like this. It was quite erotic! Looking forward to seeing more from you.