All Comments on 'The Surprised Attraction Ch. 03'

There is so much wrong with this story: poor grammar, misuse of vocabulary, misspellings, nonsensical facts. Sometimes, struggling writers need encouragement and the suggestion to enlist the aid of an author. In this case, I would suggest that you stop writing.

While you could use an editor it's still readable and very hot. Can't wait to see where this story goes next.

Instead of talking thru your ass why don't you do something constructive like use your username instead of anonymous. This way we the others readers and the author will know in advance where the shit stench is coming from.

And to you Milo don't let yourself pressure by readers whether a normal reader or the type like anon. Take your take to write what you want. Because you as you know peoples are always complaining, i.e. if you take your time to write, readers will ask, where's the next chapter. If you write to fast to satisfied those impatient reader then someone like we know who will accuse you of writing like shit. So make your own choice. Maybe one day the readers in general will understand that you're supply entertainment free of charge and that you have a life too.

so what going to happen next

Just because you are submitting an erotic story on the Literotica website does not excuse the appalling spelling, punctuation and grammar,

Literotica should not have accepted this story without further proof reading