All Comments on 'The Teacher'

You've written what I hope is the beginning to an intriguing story. Addiena is a beautiful elixir of curiosity, intelligence, and complexity. I recommend softening the edges of the Dom. He comes across as having just stepped out of her dreams/fantasies - a little too perfect. Adding a few real-life imperfections like you did with Addiena's initial social awkwardness would give him more depth. I think it was a good idea to negate romance in the Dom's interest in Addiena. Initially, it gives a you an extra degree of freedom to explore both her submission and his dominance. Romance can always come later.

Excellent writing, Addiena.

I love the way you write about his dominance and calmness. It doesnt seem cliche too like he earns her respect rather than demands it. Like he doesnt demand sir initally or for her to kneel which is quite cliche. Really good start. Keep going.

An excellent start. Well written.

I really enjoyed reading this story. It's well-written and doesn't rush. I like that the relationship expectations are clearly set up . . . although, I think he's falling for her ;) . . .

The grammar and sentence structure are pretty much spot-on, and the D/s is responsibly and realistically portrayed. There's too much BDSM erotica out there that gives D/s a bad rap. This is promising to be one of the pieces that portrays it in a true light, giving insight into the submissive mindset.

I can't wait to read more.