All Comments on 'The Traject Ch. 03'

If you add the words "in a straight line unless acted upon by an external force" you have the definition of inertia. I'm just not sure how it is relevant to your story.

sorry that would not be my reaction

It's a good story. I like it!

I've been following this story from the beginning. Great twists and turns. Will D ever find happiness? What will his conniving mother be up to?

No happy ending for our hero? There has to be a way.

Let us hope for more in our next chapter.

A very good story until now...Some will ask why does this story is in LW, but I believe that a story must stay in the same category from the beginning...To change categories in the middle or in the end isn't good to anyone...I hope D's story will end well...but let's see...4*

I have followed D from the beginning and made comments on most of the chapters...I am really enjoying your tale and the character "D"...I know it may take a while but I do hope D finds peace in the end. So keep writing my friend...I look forward to your next chapter.

Thanks for the story!

"Buckeye Fan"

Not worth reading.

love this story as it recalls the life of a guy that has had so much turmoil in his life that he should actually be going nuts by now. I agree with the one comment that a story should stay in the section that it started out in as it's easier to keep up with the story as most people don't see all the new stories on this site. Keep on writing as this a very good story

An actual piece of literature in here for a change.

A plausible life/living story.

End of chapters seem a little too summed up, though. Each chapter he seems to go through the whole chapter building a relationship; all to sum up at the end that she winds up with someone else...

End of chapter reminds me of a reason why I left home and never looked back. Sometimes family needs to work through their own problems; there is nothing that an extra person can help resolve, just confuses the situation more - life lesson one might get...

it would have been better to leave the Christina revelations to a later chapter, leaving us in anticipation of a relationship hanging, to be or not to be. TK

an excellent story ...so far....but you need a proof reader to clean up the little mistakes....keep up the good work.....George

Have been enjoying each chapter. Thanks for sharing

I didn't get all the lawyers and legal concerns that were presented. As far as Bell getting fired or exiled, that would only happen in fiction. In real life as soon as D left her office Bell would be calling security and accusing D of attempted rape and black mail. "He told me he owned me now, and tried to get me to have sex with him. So I told him to get the fuck out and never come back." Given his record and the fact that she's a Woman, of course they will believe her: women don't lie about rape. Much.

Glad that Christina got away from him before he could fuck up her life next. D is a moving IED, just waiting for the optimum target.

Can't wait to see what you contrive to make D's presence of any use in resolving his brother's issues. D will probably be fucking his brother's wife within a few days of returning. It will be the perfect payback, and self-destruction.

My wartime service was way less intense than his, and many years ago, but somehow I am completely in synch with his mental/emotional processing. I want this guy as a brother/friend/drinking partner.

How many women and situations could one person endure. Without jumping off a bridge . Your giving this David a sentence in hell. He finds a loving women and you kill it . This story is getting to be a drag.

....but I'm damned if the ride isn't one of the best I've ridden.

Try to put more into your proofing and cleaning up spelling and grammar as best you can...failing that, I'd suggest editorial help.

Arraignment isn't arrangement. That and its companion in the final paragraph stopped me cold. I had to reread it four times to make sure I understood what you were trying to say. Normally, I wouldn't squawk, but if not repaired, this could become pretty annoying.

You never want to have mistakes or "features" of your writings become a memorable part of the experience for your audience. It reflects badly on the story and its originator....and we would prefer that didn't happen.

Great, great story...please continue at flank speed....or as quickly as life allows.

there is a history to how a person makes a story go. sometimes it brings back memories that after 40 years u still wake up at nights wishing it go away. thhis story line seems to have brought them back.

It really difficult to see where this going.

makes it such a great story Bruce. You gotta think to keep up with it.

new locations always brings more diseases to ward off. TK U MLJ LV NV

Quite frankly, the last few paragraphs made this whole chapter feel pointless, and that I wasted my time reading it, since everything in it just gets dropped like a hot potato.

Why the hell would he need to be away for months just because his brother is in prison?

It's not like he's a defense lawyer.

It has been mentioned several times that he had an abusive childhood, so why does he just drop everything when family comes calling?

Once again, I’m wondering what comes next. It’s not as clear as Ann’s eventual cheating. He had a mess to clean up... but why didn’t D return to Christina, or at least stay in contact? The next chapter must be huge.

and very little peace included, TK U MLJ LV NV

When he does... what will his busybody mother have to say about it. Did she know that her 'favorite' son was fucking her other son's fiance' and go along with him being cuckolded?

I've been thinking that ever since she cheated the first time, then even more when she was pregnant, but there's the light skin and red hair... There's no doubt in my mind Angel should be a dead man walking if that's the case. Now he's up to five good women that he's let slip away, shit, that's just not fair. So far all he's really been sucessful at is putting holes in others and keeping some others and himself alive which is no small feat in itself. Signed: BTW