The Way Back Ch. 06

"Ann, if I were doing that I wouldn't be telling you this. They have eyes; they have ears. I just wanted you to be ready if they broach the subject."

"But you want them here."

"Please, Ann," I said, patiently I hoped. "What I want is totally irrelevant, and I'm not sure I could cope. I'm self-sufficient here by myself, but a ready-made family? What matters is what's best for them. Personally I think they're better with you, but they're frightened of Derek -- nothing I've said," I added hastily.

"Oh."

Viv stirred. "Time we were going," she told Ann. Did Ann look disappointed?

"Is it all right to say goodnight to the children?" Ann asked.

"Grief, Ann," I said. "Of course. You don't need to ask!"

She smiled and left the room.

Viv lost no time while Ann was out of the room.

"Allan," she said quietly. "Ann is in a bad way. She's been knocked sideways so many times over the past few weeks and today was the last straw. She doesn't know what to make of it all; first she's woken at five-thirty by the police who take her man away without telling her anything, all she got was that he was arrested for attempted murder, then she was arrested and grilled for nearly eight hours. David said they hardly let up. No one's telling her anything and she's confused and frightened. Try to help her, Allan."

"I would have thought her boyfriend would be the one to help," I replied coldly. Why did everyone think I had a responsibility to Ann?

"He's not there and he may not be until the trial."

"Rubbish, Viv. He'll be out on bail tomorrow, and I'll bet O'Malley will be as well, and I'll bet also that by the end of the week, O'Malley will have forgotten about any detail of his part in this business. The other three will be remanded: they've got form."

"Allan, please," she pleaded. "Don't take your frustrations out on me. Ann is now in a dreadful position; she doesn't know whether to trust Derek or not. She's not in possession of all the facts. She needs to know them. You can give her the facts. Please Allan?"

I caved in. "OK Viv," I said, as Ann came back into the room. "If she wants to know anything, she'll have to come to me. I'm not running round after her."

"Who?" asked Ann.

"You." I said curtly.

"Time to go," said Viv.

"What do I do about the lads, Ann? I can get them to school tomorrow, but do you want them to come back to you tomorrow afternoon?"

"I don't know what's going to happen tomorrow. Can they come back to you, Greta as well?"

I nodded.

"Can I come by tomorrow? I really need to talk to you."

"Why not come early, before they get back from school."

Viv smiled at me lovingly. Yes I'd given in, big fool that I was. Ann looked grateful and said she'd phone to confirm during the day. I told her to phone my mobile; I wasn't sure if I'd be at work.

As we reached the door, Viv hugged me hard.

"Thank you," she whispered. "You're a good man."

"I'm a fool!" I muttered into her ear, and she giggled.

Ann came for her hug, and once again I had her in my arms and the way we fitted together brought the memories of our past intimacy flooding back. She kissed my cheek and I kissed hers. There were tears in her eyes and a lump in my throat.

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THIRTY

I don't do cooked breakfasts during the working week, so there were all the boxes of cereals on the kitchen table, a jug of milk and, against my better judgement, a bowl of sugar. Prizing my daughter and elder son out of sleep proved a chore, and that evoked memories of past mornings, though Stefan was up and chirpy in good time. I told them to return to me in the afternoon and we would work out where they would be spending the night.

My original idea was to have them walk to school. Stefan's primary school was nearby and the high school was a twenty-minute walk away, but a look out of the window showed a small band of reporters at the gate so I took them all by car, nearly killing a couple of the news-hounds in the process.

When I returned the posse had gone, so I got my stuff together and went into work. I got a hug and a sensuous kiss from Jenny once we were safely in my office.

"Missed you," she whispered.

I told her I'd missed her too. She wanted a run down on the events of the previous day, and this I gave her. I finished by telling her that Ann was coming over mid-afternoon to talk, so I would be leaving early. I could not read the expression on her face, but uncertainty might sum it up. I did not comment.

Shortly after one o'clock, Geoff came in to tell me that on the one o'clock news he had seen Ann and Derek leaving the Magistrates' court. All the defendants had been remanded to the Crown Court for trial as I expected, the three thugs in custody, and Derek and O'Malley on bail. Apparently there was a case to answer and the Crown Court trial would be in three or four months.

At two o'clock, I got a call from Ann.

"Allan," she said rather breathlessly I thought, and visions of them making passionate love after being reunited came to mind. I reprimanded myself and listened.

"Are you free now?" she asked. "I'm in the car ready to come over."

I knew I would take me five minutes to leave things at the works, and a further ten at least to get home.

"Twenty minutes," I said and rang off.

Jenny and I tidied up and left together. As we emerged, there was a camera crew photographing us. They made as if to come to interview us, but I was in a hurry to get home before Ann arrived. Jenny stopped; I left.

I was only just inside the house when Ann arrived. She was dressed in tee shirt and jeans and looked good in them, but then she looked good in anything!

I didn't need to ask her if she wanted some tea, and set about making it. She sat at the kitchen table in silence until there was a mug in front of each of us.

"Can we go into the living room?" she asked. So we did. I sat in an armchair and she on the sofa. She looked at me and I sensed muted hostility.

"Why are you doing this to Derek?"

The question was stark and unanswerable. It was akin to the famous 'Have you stopped beating your wife, yes or no?'

"I thought we'd been through this before. I am doing nothing to Derek."

"Derek says you are. He says you're responsible for this witch hunt."

"Well, of course Derek must be right, and by implication I am a liar."

"But he says you've been accusing him of trying to murder you."

"Ann, I've told you before, if you can find a single person to say I've accused him of anything, I'll be amazed, and in fact I'll show you a liar. I have never made any accusation against Derek. In any case, how would he know if I did or didn't?"

"But you believe he's done this."

"Oh yes, but that's a far cry from accusing him to anyone else. Ann, you are the first person to whom I've even admitted what I think privately."

"I don't understand."

"OK," I said. "I'll do what I've done for others. I'll give you all the facts I know. I told anyone whom I gave this information to, to make up their own minds. So you can do the same. Make up your own mind. How's that?"

"Allan," she said plaintively. "No one will tell me anything. I need to know."

"OK." I said again. "Here goes. You know I remember nothing about my attack, or the time immediately before or after it? All that information came from others. How can I accuse anyone? I don't know anything about this thing from my own experience. Greta says that Peter told you a great deal. This is what I've been told.

"I met Felicia, my cousin, by chance in the hotel. You remember the man O'Malley in the photo? He was there and also at the station. You remember the photo of O'Malley and me leaving the station? Recently he told Colin, Keith and me that he was paid three thousand pounds to follow me and lead me to three other men, who he named as the ones who appeared in court today.

"The three men drove a Red Toyota. The police found the car (was it last week?), and also my DNA in the boot. The car was registered at the time of my attack to one of those three men. Derek is their employer. O'Malley sub contracts for Derek and he said that they boasted to him that they got ten thousand pounds each 'to get the job done'.

"There was a witness who saw three men unload my body onto a building site out of the boot of a red Toyota.

"Next. You only saw four 'incriminating' photos of me and 'my woman'. The other two, which would have exonerated me, were not sent to you. They were there. Why weren't they sent? Colin is fond of a Latin phrase, 'Cui bono?'"

"Yes," interrupted Ann. "It means 'Who benefits?'"

"That's right, and that's the question you have to ask, not me. Who benefitted from the photos being kept back?

"Everyone tells me that you didn't give up hope about me returning until you received a letter purportedly from me telling you coldly that I did not love you. I could not have physically written it; neither did I have any memory of you or of the children at the time it was written. It is a forgery. So once again 'cui bono'?

"Now," I had one more piece to give her. "Who urged you to get a divorce? Who urged you to go for half the company? Whose building firm is in serious financial trouble and needs a great deal of money urgently?"

Ann had been becoming more and more pale and agitated as my account continued.

"Derek never said anything about his firm being in trouble," she said quietly.

"I have it from Colin and Keith, who obviously have been privy to that sort of information, and even Geoff had heard rumours. So you could say that it's common knowledge."

"And he didn't tell me," she said pensively.

"Ann," I said gently, "have I accused Derek? No. I've laid before you the facts, as far as I know them. I don't need to accuse him, Ann. The facts speak for themselves."

"B-but," she croaked, "I've lived with him for a year, and he'd done this to you? I feel sick."

"You didn't know."

"Oh, Allan. He lied from the beginning. He took over the 'search' for you, and I sat back and let him."

She lapsed into silence. I watched her face. It showed her suffering, but gradually anger replaced the sadness. I waited, and waited. Then she spoke. There was gritty determination in her voice, and once again it triggered a clearer memory of the Ann I had known and loved. She was no weak defenceless female, but a proud independent woman. I think the tragedy in her life of her husband rejecting her had destroyed a lot of that confidence and assertiveness; the forged letter had given gave her new fire against me. Now it was directed elsewhere.

"Well, he really is history now. I need to find somewhere for us to live."

She smiled wryly, "I never did like that house anyway."

Was this the old Ann? Even in a situation like this she could find a modicum of humour.

"What will you do Ann? Tonight, I mean?"

"Oh, I'm going back there." She had that set in her jaw that I now remembered with a new acuity.

She thought for a moment.

"Will you have the children here? I can take care of myself but I don't want them there."

"Are you sure," I asked, "that you want to be alone with him in the house?"

"Allan," she said patiently. "Derek is a pussy-cat. He doesn't do violence -- himself. And I have to say he loves me to bits," she added smugly, "Mind you, he's not been getting any since I spoke to you and cancelled the wedding, unless of course he's been doing some DIY."

We both laughed at that, and the phone rang. It was Jenny.

"How did things go?" she asked. "Do you want me over?"

"Hi Jenny," I answered, watching Ann's face. "It's been a bit busy; Ann took Derek home and is here now. The kids will be staying over. Want to come over this evening?"

She thought for a moment.

"Is Ann staying?" she asked.

"No. She's going back to Derek's tonight. I think she has a bone to pick with him. Then she'll be looking for somewhere else to live. Any ideas?"

"I'll think about it and get back to you."

I normally read faces well. It is a skill which seemed to return early after I began to recover. It is essential if one is engaged in sales and negotiation.

However the emotion on Ann's face during that exchange on the phone eluded me. Was it disappointment, or perhaps resignation? I did not know. What I did know was that it was not a happy face, but that could have been down to her discovery of Derek's machinations.

"What's the matter Ann?" I asked ingenuously. In reality I was sure Jenny was at the heart of this.

"Nothing," she answered in a measured tone that brooked no follow-up questioning. I knew better than to try so I changed the subject.

"How are you going to handle this?" was my next question.

"Well," she said. "Could you look after the children for a while? I know they'll love being here; it's home to them. I'll put together all their things tomorrow when Derek's gone to work and I'll bring them over."

"OK, that's fine with me," I said. "Greta's met Jenny, and the boys will have to meet her as well. She's good with young people, so there shouldn't be a problem."

I hastened on the to the next question: "How will you handle things with Derek?"

"I don't need to. I'll tell him the children are going to live with you, but I won't tell him what I know. I can live with his lies, and he can live with mine, or my silence. He's getting used to sleeping alone. I can stand the occasional kiss and hug. I need to find a place to rent, and when I've got it, I'll have some fun with his mind."

She saw my puzzlement.

"I'm going to tell him what I've decided to do. Allan, I'm going to withdraw all claims on you financially. I don't want any part of the company, I never did; I was doing what Derek thought was best, and now I know why.

"God! I was so easily led! I'll also withdraw all claims to any of your invested money or maintenance. Then I'll tell him. It will mean there'll be no money for him, then I'll see what he'll do. I just wonder how far what he did was to get me, or get the money. In a way I hope he chucks me out.

"Then I'll move all my stuff out and finally tell him he's finished."

I must confess I had to admire her single mindedness and her calculated viciousness. It was a side of her I had not known or did not remember, and rapidly decided I did not want to remember.

"Stay for tea?" I asked.

"Please," she answered with a smile. "It'll be good to be around the children without the stress of having Derek around, they really hate him, you know."

"Yes," I replied with a grimace. "They told me. Greta said something else which worried me a little. She said she didn't like the way he was looking at her."

Ann looked surprised then her lip curled in distaste. "Just as well she's moved out then." There was a pause and her brow furrowed. "That's worrying."

I had decided to make pork chops in breadcrumbs with rice, corn and string beans, and an apple pie for afters. We went back to the kitchen and worked together getting everything ready for when the children arrived.

When the lads did arrive they whooped with joy at seeing their mother and, I suspected, finding her with me in the kitchen as they remembered.

After hugging her the inevitable questions started.

"Have you come home Mum?" Jan.

"Are you staying with Dad now?" Stefan.

"One at a time!" cried Ann, as she struggled for breath having been squeezed by her sons. "I've asked Dad if you can stay here for a while."

"Does that mean we're never going back with him?" asked Stefan.

"Yes," she told him. "You're never going back to that house again."

"Oh, cool!" he was smiling all over his face, as was Jan.

"And are you coming home?" persisted Jan.

"Jan, it's not as easy as that. Dad is with someone else now; she's called Jennifer, and until today I was with Derek."

"Can't he dump her, like you've dumped Derek?"

"Jan!" exclaimed Ann, "There's a good reason why I'm going to finish with Derek."

"Yes, he tried to kill Dad," said Stefan.

"Where did you hear that?" Ann asked aggressively and looked daggers at me.

"It was on the TV, Mum."

"And what did I tell you Stefan?" I asked him.

"Everyone is innocent until proved guilty, Dad," interrupted Jan.

Ann looked relieved, but I was angry. She had assumed I had told them even after I'd told her I didn't. I shot her a look and she had the grace to look embarrassed.

"But you're finishing with Derek so you think he's guilty as well," added Jan.

Now Ann was conflicted.

"I think there's enough evidence to worry about your safety," she said at length, "and that's why I want you here. As soon as I can get a place for you all, you can move in with me. In the meantime I'm going back to Derek's place."

I'd had enough.

"OK, folks," I said decisively. "Listen. You three are going to live here with me. Mum has to finish with Derek properly, and she has to find somewhere to live. She can't live with me because I already have a girlfriend who I refuse to 'dump' as you so eloquently put it, Jan. You will meet Jenny later tonight or tomorrow. She is a good woman and you will be polite to her. Greta has met her and likes her. Conversation closed."

At this point Greta arrived, "Who do I like, Dad?" she asked, coming through the door.

"Jenny."

"Oh, yes," she enthused. "She's really cool. Oh, hello Mum!"

The latter was said with some surprise mixed with delight and she crossed to Ann and hugged her.

"You staying for tea?" she asked, getting a nod.

The children dispersed and Ann and I finished cooking the dinner. I added a pineapple ring to each chop as a sign of added celebration, the children loved this meal and usually asked for it on their birthdays. Another isolated memory.

We ate together in the dining room as we had always done. It was comforting and felt right, but at the same time faintly unreal since we were no longer a whole family. Still, the conversation flowed with much talk about school and friends. There was a good deal of laughter and plays upon words; Ann gave as good as she got.

Once again I was reminded more clearly than ever how beautiful she was, how animated her face, how bright and quick her wit, and how her smile lit up her face. Again the anger arose that all we had had, all this happy family life had been wantonly destroyed by that man to whom she was returning.

After the meal Ann said she would have to go, but would return the next day with the children's things. It was confirmation if any were needed that they were to stay and they looked happy and content.

Jenny phoned and I asked her round. She said she had an idea which she wasn't sure I'd like, but which she'd tell me about when she arrived. She also said that she wouldn't stay the night with the lads there, since they'd only just moved in.

She arrived and I called the lads down to meet her.

Stefan took a look, said "Hello" and went back to his games.

Jan stood and I had to hold back my laughter. He looked at her and I recognised that look. He had fallen in love at first sight. He was tongue-tied and shy but could not take his eyes off her. Thirteen and fancying a woman more than twice his age!

"Hello, Jan," she said softly and smiled.

"H-hello," he stammered out and turned and ran.

She turned to me and looked puzzled.

"What?" was all she said.

"He's fallen in love with you," I laughed.

"What?"

"He's smitten. You've captured his heart! I've got competition. Are you going to leave me for him?"

She recovered quickly.

"Well, he's much younger than you, and much better looking! I could be tempted!"

"You slut! So fickle! Thrown over by her lust for his son!"

We laughed a lot at this, and retired to the living room.

"I've an idea," said Jenny, "I don't think you'll like it."

"Go on."

"Well, Ann needs somewhere to live."

"Yes. Perceptive as always," I said with a touch of sarcasm.