The Way You Look Tonight Ch. 04

The fact that Nicky was going to finally realize his childhood dream of being in the major leagues filled me with both joy and sadness. I wanted to be there with him when he drove to the ballpark. I wanted to watch him on the field working with the players. I wanted to fill with pride as I watched him live out his dream. I couldn't share the experience with him. It seemed that every step I took without Nicky was accompanied by some kind of pain. Bea left shortly after that.

About a week later she called again. She told me that her plan worked. He agreed to come to the wedding. The team made it into the playoffs, but were eliminated in the first round. Watching Nicky and Mickey together on the field on television was a mix of joy and pride, dampened by the emptiness I still felt without my husband.

On the day of the wedding, I was as nervous as a school girl about to go on a first date. The plan was for Bea and Monsignor Mickey to trick Nicky into my room. I didn't feel good about that. But I needed to speak to him, and whatever that took was worth the price of deception. And their plan worked. I had finished getting dressed, my make-up and hair were all done, and I was ready. I was so nervous, I hadn't had anything to eat all day. The knock on the door came.

When I opened the door, Bea and Nicky were standing side-by-side, and Mickey was behind them. God. He looked so good, I just wanted to jump into his arms and hold him. I could see by the look in his eyes that he wanted to do the same thing. But he started to turn and tried to walk away. Mickey stopped him dead in his tracks.

"Don't you be gettin' any ideas about runnin' away now Nicky. Sure 'n you will not be leavin' this room right now unless it's over my dead carcass."

Mickey nudged Nicky into the room, and he and Bea left and closed the door behind them. It was awkward, so I broke the ice.

"Nicky, you are looking well. It's so good to see you. How are you doing? You must be so excited to be with Mickey on the big club."

"You look good yourself, Candice. Too good. I think you know how I'm doing. Yeah, it was a thrill to be up with the Feds, but it was empty without you."

Nicky appeared very anxious and at one point started walking toward the door.

"Nicky, please don't go...please. I know you hate me and that you don't want to be here. But for all the years we had together, can't you just give me a few minutes? I don't know how many ways to tell you I'm sorry. I've rehearsed this a million times when I found out from Bea that she was getting you to come to the wedding.

"I know this is hard for you. Please sit down and let me tell you my story. I have the divorce papers with me. I promise that if you just listen to me, if you want to walk away after I'm done, I'll sign the damned papers and hand them to you today."

Nicky sat on the bed, while I took the chair across from him. I told him everything that had happened in my life from the time I was fourteen. He sat there in stunned silence. When I was done, he got up. "Was this it?" I thought. "Would this be the end?"

"Candice, I'm stunned. I'm still trying to wrap my head around all of this. It was enough of a shock just to see you. And now hearing your story...I'm sorry...I don't know what the hell to think."

"Do we have a chance, Nicky? Please be honest with me."

"Candice, I need some time. Don't sign the papers. Let's talk after the reception."

With that, he got up, kissed me on the cheek and left the room. I managed to hold myself together for my daughter's sake.

The wedding was absolutely beautiful. Faith was so happy that her father walked her down the aisle. And both Faith and our son Mickey were hoping there could be a reconciliation. But at the reception, Nicky seemed a bit cold and distant, off in his own world.

After the usual introductions were made at the wedding reception, and things quieted down, Faith noticed that her dad was up by the DJ. The music stopped and the DJ made an announcement.

"Ladies and gentleman....At this time, I have a special announcement. I'll bet that you didn't know that today is actually the mother and father of the bride's twenty-fifth wedding anniversary. Let's see if we can get them out on the dance floor."

I heard the words to the song begin... "Some day, when I'm awfully low...."

Nicky began walking toward my table. I started shaking. When he got closer, he held out his hand to mine. I grabbed it and he said, "Hi. I'm Nicholas. How about after this dance I take you out for some ice cream?"

I jumped up into his arms. We danced, and everything felt like it should be. I put my head into Nicky's shoulder and chest and held him tight, never wanting to let him go. I knew then that we would be together for ever.

Yes you're lovely, never, ever change

Keep that breathless charm

Won't you please arrange it?

Cause I love you

Just the way you look tonight.