All Comments on 'Three Square Meals Ch. 009'

Now the guns are out its even better, hope the next chapter is coming soon.

All of the chapters so far have been well thought out, presented, and delivered. Keep up the good work.

So now you've dropped two hints no?

1. Alyssa past = either sister / childhood friend

2. Alyssa feeling something grow = I knew she did not have the time to go on birth control!

As far as I concern we should expect two more developments

1. Finding more on John's history = is he a royal prince???

2. When do we get a sexy green alien lady into the mix?

Your first two guesses are answered in Chapter 10 which is nearly complete.

As for the other two... You will have to wait and see! :)

I see that you are a new author, and it's obvious you're not writing this story just for the sake of sex scenes. It's obvious you're a fan of sci-fi and space battles, and of futuristic technologies, and it's damn awesome that it is so.

However, I'm noticing that you tend to jump from sex scene into a space combat scene abruptly, then shift it back into sex rather quickly. It's not bad, per se, but the abruptness may cause a bit of a hitch to the flow of the story - just a cautionary notice. So, let me put an idea through to you: How about you dedicate one whole chapter or chapters to non-erotic part of this whole adventure, and make it into an extended suspense/action/thriller scene, with an air of seriousness, gunfights, hoverbike chases, and dangerous spaceship battles? Maybe even something wrapped up in spy stuff mystery? I mean there is a war brewing on the horizon, isn't there? So, when that extended chapter is done, the main characters get to celebrate their victory with awesome sex? You did something like that before in this chapter, as well as when they saved Calara, yes, but it was short. I'm talking something more dedicated and lengthy - something that would be much more rewarding overall. I mean, just think about it.

Anyway, when it comes to the sex scenes, I'll just say that you're doing awesome. It's nicely written, it isn't forced, a chemistry can be felt, emotions and love are present, and kinkiness is very welcome to spice it up. If you do feel like increasing the level of kinkiness even more, that's okay, since you're obviously taking effort to make it more than just sex. That much is from me.

Good advice, thank you for the feedback. I'll think about that for future chapters. I have submitted chapter 10 and it's awaiting approval. Coincidentally it follows some of your advice, so let me know if you find that format works a bit better.

So, is this incest in disguise? If he's modifying them to share his own genetic material, he's basically turning them into his daughters-by-injection. And he is old enough to be their Daddy.

Is Daddy-Daughters one of the kinks, here? Incest is the most popular category on Literotica.

It's a bit like those idiots that thought it was a good idea to blow up that beached whale carcass...

When a spacecraft is "destroyed", unless antimatter is the manner of destruction, the navigation hazards that remain must be attended to. Salvage of the power system is important, and maybe picking up the loot from previous piratical acts might be somewhat profitable. But no, they hypered on their way without a backward glance.

And no ship's computer at all?! The Invictus is just a dumb transport?

You might want to find a good editor to help you flesh out your line drawings.

This isn't a science story, it's science-fantasy, because that makes for much more interesting and exciting fight scenes.

"the navigation hazards that remain must be attended to."

I've never seen a scene in Star-wars where they stop and clear away the ruins of a tie fighter, or in Star-Trek where they stop to clear up a wrecked Klingon Warbird. Such scenes would be boring, tedious filler, and a waste of the readers time.

"And no ship's computer at all"

The ship is mostly automated, but they need crew for functions such as flying and shooting, just like the Millennium Falcon or the Enterprise.

Tefler

This is my 5th time reading this story. It's the best story on this site "in my opinion" please keep it going Tefler.

If you want hard science fiction go grab a Heinlein book, or Weber, or Herbert or or or or or.

Why don't you go ahead and toss a link up for something that you have written so the rest of us can take a peek at it.

To clear the air... regarding the possible captured/slaves or anyone that may not be a pirate on the pirate vessels... because not all pirates would toss a fine women into a pit with a Largath, some might keep them around for weeks as the pirate ships cum storage. At the very least hail all three and give each the chance to surrender. But to keep it short and justify the destruction have them shoot at the invictus and in the ensuing brief battle they are destroyed... that way there’s no need to check for survivors.

1.Its not a game where you destroy a ship ,collect the loot and upgrade it.This is real life (not as real you know what I am saying) and they had to get to somewhere important so they didn't bother collecting any useless scrap which would be worth as shit as compared to tyranium on karron , so if you want to do it ,go play a game for god's sake ..... And another thing ,they actually get an artificial intelligence later so read the later chapters first and then comment , don't fret over things you don't know much about ,And he has amazing editors,no need for your worthless concern....

2.well you know they actually do this in the later exploits ,scanning pirate ships and searching for prisons so as not to kill them in the process by using an on-board scanner,maybe they just used it here and didn't find any , except it's not mentioned,maybe tefler forgot anyway he has written separate ebooks on Amazon and it has all the improvements maybe you should check them out.....

each chapter builds on the next one, each character grows and compliments the other character. They have great balance and a foundation for love and a healthy relationship...

Pages of fucking separated by 2 to 3 paragraphs of actual things happening. Hope this turns around into a bit of a story soon.

I agree with Anonymous 07/25/19; the sex is fine, but so repetitive after 6 or 8 or 20 or 50 times, it becomes routine and tedious. The story is extremely interesting, the writing superb, but I find myself skipping past all the sex to find something new. Even so, it's a great story.

Story line

I respect the comments about too much repetitive sex

But

Lols there is always a but

But the short chapters make it work. The works I find tedious and often abandon are the wannabe great novelists who seem to forget that lit is a community exploring the erotic dimensions of human sexuality

And then, remember Coleridge and the active suspension of disbelief

This series, to me, is perfectly designed

The sex is not just a decoration I promise it's a necessary facet even in this amount

"First combat" ?? What you saying ...

He has more planned

This could get interesting

Note to self; pack ELECTRIC candles to set mood for romantic times when traveling.

Eh, isn't it actually bummer that their bodies transform into same proportions.

Shall I tell you where you screwed up author? It is the 28th century, humanity has united, but for some reason it does not use a much more convenient metric system. Inches and pounds, ugh.

He did say "first ship to ship" combat. So that's a promise of what's to come.

Most intriguing. Eagerly anticipating .... to read how this story develops.

Hoorah! ..."they sashayed out of the gym together"... beware: the sashaying has begun... ;-) TTFN

Love it!

Awesome story

TIT TO TIT COMBAT.

That's it for me... I gave it 9 chapters to develop into an actual scifi story instead of just a boring fuck fest... I'm done... If you took out the fucking this thing would only be. 3 pages long... If that... As to all of these admiring comments... Some people have really low standards as to what good lit is...

-jaye-

I agree with the commenters who have asked for more substance or some separation between the sex and the action. Yes, I recognize the irony of asking for less sex in stories published on an Erotica site, mmmmI have already taken to skimming the sex scenes, not because it’s poorly written, but because the repetitive nature, even written well (as it has been) makes it rather dull. At this point, I’m going to stick around and keep reading, so I hope future chapters gain some balance.

Your reply to the previous poster was a bit over the top - I’m surprised no one has called you out for it. While I appreciate defending an author’s choices and also his team of editors, a good author will consider alternative views. They may not utilize them, but even when they don’t, those views serve to reinforce the author’s decisions. Also, and with the understanding that getting a story updated on Lit is akin to catching a leprechaun, there are quite a few grammatical and linguistic errors in these early chapters, so let’s not go around sucking each other’s d*cks just yet.

---- Invictus crew demolishes Pirates, ... The ship has hidden weapons, behind armored and sliding panels, ... Now Alyssa has a story or two to tell, ... ;-) TTFN

--- Although, John might have sent Charles an AAR from the Invictus first Pirate stomping, ... the Vice Admiral would have loved it, ... ;-) TTFN

I love the slow build up of the crew. I’ve read this 4 times so far. Also for those reading for the first time, THIS STORY IS STILL BEING ACTIVELY WRITTEN, it’s not dead. Sure personal reasons stopped the author writing for 2 or 3 months but it’s still alive and adventurous.

I recommend joining patreon to get the story as it’s so far ahead on this free release and you can just signup to pay for each chapter as it’s released each month. I personally would buy the four books that have been released but it’s only on Amazon so it’s kindle shit and I’m happily in the walled iPad garden wanting epub book releases.

But read on the story is fantastic and imaginative. Sure a few bits get repetitive way down the track but it seems as if comments were taken on board and that was solved easily. Processes and lore of this world are set very early on in this story and apparently the author didn’t intend to write such a saga. So with that in mind you can understand how a story could trip itself up down the line on early established lore but it’s handled well.

Great story, never gets old or boring.

Keep up the magnificent work Telfer

@ Texster. This story chapter release is 8 YEARS OLD ! Nothing is going to change it. That’s a given but I can say that as the story progresses and morphs from a quick limited story into a saga the sex tones down a bit, mellows out if you will and the story line is far far more prominent.

This has been published into 4 books so far so enough people must like it. Remember it wasn’t started with the intention of being a 160 chapter epic with way more to come. Literotica is intentionally kept way behind on releases and only patreon is truely up to date being 30 chapters or so ahead of here. Free has its limitations.

So complaining about the story or it’s style or it’s composition is pointless here as it’s old already released and everyone already knows. Patreon members get a voice so there is always that if you want.

I have to admit as this story really takes off I did find the sex in the latter chapters to be repetitive since there is a very definite and fixed method of joining the crew. So after a few crew members join… you get the idea. However Telfer releasies this and it gets dealt with but more ‘sex off camera’ so to speak as one method.

So read on see how the story and the author find their way in the TSM world and the authoring world. It’s worth it.

@ Anonymous who only gave it 9 chapters then bailed. You should have given it a few more. The first chapters are very short as well. This story was started and meant to be a short sex filled romp. It changed into an epic with more substance. You need to realise that you’re 8 years behind at chapter 9 still in the old short story mindset not the epic story mindset.

So read more or bail, you be the judge.

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

"I wanted to talk to you about my past and why I want to travel back to Karron".

Four ⭐ with 4 thumbs up!! Next stop, more ✨.

... was Calara struck dumb, creaming her shorts when she first saw Invictus, "The Assault Cruiser loomed in front of them, taking up most of the view, and Calara took in the intimidating sight of the many weapon banks bristling along the ship's hull." Alright, the armored panels were pealed back while she was docked, can this be normal? I think it was just Tef taking a little artistic license, ... not making much sense, but hey, it's his story to tell, ... ;-) ttfn

... okay, "I wanted to talk to you about my past and why I want to travel back to Karron". -- just what or who did Alyssa leave behind on Karron? '-) ttfn

patiently waiting for the yellow N

A nice little space battle, swatting a few pirates, it was enjoyable seeing the girls and John do their things.

-- Telepathic range, ... Alyssa started at a max range of 10 meters early in the chapter, ... then by 3 days later she focused and increased the range to 50 meters, then by the following week, she could sense John anywhere on the 500-meter-long vessel, ... granted, there was more psychic cum along with the greater range, ... I wonder what, if any, new talents Calara might soon manifest, ...

-- And what is the special story Alyssa needs to tell her lovers? Is it related to what she left behind? ... the Mining Asteriod of Karron awaits! ;-) ttfn