All Comments on 'Twelve Gates Ch. 10'

really love this story its so good keep up the good work

This could go either way. Everything depends upon his whim. I wish she were stronger.

to me, the gap between how fast and deep she submits to his control *outside* the bedroom vs. the relative slow pace of her sexual submission to him is at the same time intriguing and strange.

but it works - i mean, i "believe" it, weird as i may find it - and it makes this story stand out amongst the rest of them.

bottom line - thoroughly enjoyable read, 5/5, and eagerly waiting the next chapter :)

Wait - hang on - they haven't had vaginal sex yet? Is that how I've read this? She's pierced her nipples, quit her job and moved in with a guy she hasn't had sex with yet? No mention of her friends? No mention of his motives/thought process? He moved across the country to be with her? She spends all her waking hours with him?

There's nothing in anything he's done (yet) that is a cause for concern, but I still feel like I'm watching a horror movie slowly unfold. Ominous music plays in the background, and I worry that this relatively inexperienced girl is getting isolated from her family and her only means of livelihood are now dependent on him.

(Sorry. I know this is fiction - really well written fiction - but if this were real life, I'd be the friend insisting that she runs for the hills. In real life, this is dangerous behaviour.)

You certainly know how to write a story and get a reaction.

And you know what ?

I'm with fun girl and STG here...cue ominous music....Jaws theme will do.

However ...we shall see what we shall see.

5/5 for a continuing good read

So so good!!

You do have the gift of making everyone wonder what's going to happen next, which for the record is a good thing when you're a writer. I can't wait for the next chapter to find out.

5 more from me and thank you!!

I look forward to BUYING your novels someday! I'm also looking forward to a marathon re-read when all chapters of the Twelve Gates are published. You have really kept me on the edge of my seat. I also liked the little writer's block story you recently published. It had a lot of subtle humor.

This can end really well or really badly. I cannot wait

sex on a page

I'm not sure how this will end, but still loving the way you write.

Her submission outside the bedroom is far more complete than inside and i am left wondering just how far he is going to take away what makes her...her..

Waiting the next chapter eagerly as always, but now to see wether the Jaws music is necessary!!!

5 stars for the writing style and for leaving me wanting more!!!

You have a talen!!!! Beautiful chaper, I wonder where this will end...

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