All Comments on 'Under The Influence of Surrender'

This was so freaking confusing, I had to stop reading. You keep going in and out of plots that I didn't know what was a fantasy what was real. When she bumped her head, did she pass out? if she did, how can she can taste the semen? Just a few observations....

The idea of the story is a young girl who is able to experience the physical sensations

that someone else has. Everything that happens in the story is real and not a fantasy. Hopefully if you give it another chance the explanations provided will clear up any confusion. Thanks for taking the time to read and comment.

For some reason there are large chunks of my story that have formatting problems making it difficult to read. I am trying to correct this problem but so far have not found a solution. My apologies to all of you taking the time to read through it.

But I just couldn't finish reading. A 50 line paragraph?? And into page two, it seems like it's in the wrong category

They're college girls but have lockers? And are going to a Valentine's Day dance in a gym? No.

I thought it was hot . Understood it all and loved it 👌

I think the idea of two girls having mental-physical connection is quite interesting

But not too like the sex with male scene and honestly I skipped a really large part due to the terrible organization..basically I have only read from the beginning to where they got to Colleen's house, then skip and scan to the ending where Colleen told Fran she loved her, but anyway to me these 2 scene were the best parts already.