All Comments on 'Unexpected Ch. 10'

You can write a discription of a hocky game but not take the time to have Alex explain to Tracy if he'd had a crush on Callen all those years ago? That chapter that jumped a year has ruined the story.......Plus Alex and Tracy made love and you don't descibe that !!! but spend two paragraphs describing Tracy picking up the kids.

I really enjoy your writing. Sexy scenes would be great, but at the same time I kind of like that you leave it to our imagination. Have to agree with the prior comment about Alex explaining his feelings for Cal, but hey it is your story, you write it as you want. I enjoy it anyway. Thanks, btw, Happy Holidays and healthy new year!

BUBBY.? WHY BRING THE DRAMA OF THE LEGAL SHIT INTO IT DROP THAT AND GET THEM MARRIED OFF IN A DOUBLE WEDDING ,O AND YOU NEED TO GET MORE CHAPTERS OUT FASTER ...HAPPY NEW YEAR X JONATHAN UK

Hey Folks,

I don't usually write any replies. I am taking heed to what you are writing in your feedback, I am new to writing and trying to learn as I go. There is still a long way to travel for me. Please be patient, keep up with constructive criticism it helps and I take it on board. Not the complaining it just hurts my feelings.

As far as sex scenes go, I am terrible. I have someone helping me write them better so they will start appearing more in the chapters to come. I am always about 4 chapters ahead and don't like to go backwards if I don't have to.

Regards

Bndmtl

I applaud your efforts. This story is so adorable, keep up the good work.

Happy New Year

Keep up the good work loving the story so far and can't wait until the next instalment :) Have a happy new year.

Thank you for this story. I love these characters. The story is Great! Keep it coming and Thank You for these folks . Happy New Year!

Though the writing is good, it feels flat, no emotion.

I would like to add one sentence at the end of paragraph 2, just before the Gelato bribe by Tracy, and Callen and Jase are seated

Thank you God for keeping our bargain.

I'm guessing the way this engagement worked out would qualify as 'Find my brother someone awesome to love and make him happy.' from Chapter 5.