All Comments on 'Upon a Savage Shore Ch. 12'

I am really enjoying this story. If it was published I would pay money for it .

Woot woot so happy for the new chapter and extremely loving this story

I am thoroughly enjoying this story.

I also must applaud you on your discipline in holding back on posting chapters. Taking the time to think through your plotline and allow yourself some leeway to fix any discrepancies is a well conceived and instituted plan.

It appears to be working well for you so far and I hope that it continues to.

Creek, not creak.

Great story.

sheesh...took him long enuf......what with ALL the frickin soul searching he has to do to nail willing partners......

Refreshingly new look at an old Science Fiction premise. Your writing is excellent, your use of dialogue is spontaneous, not contrived at all. I only noticed that one spelling error and I am impressed with the editing as much as anything else. I am glad to be reading this as you finish, but I also would have liked to have found it after you finished the series and thus enjoyed the whole story at once. Which I of course will do when you finish it.

Thanks for sharing your story with us.

I appreciate the fact that you take your time. 1. Taking the time to read through, write ahead, and check plot points. Kudos to you on that. 2. That you just didn't jump into mushy sloppy kitty lovey dovey eewy gewy alin sex! :-) To many on here just jump right to the action of banging the ever-lovin fuzz out of their partners.

As for the rest of it. Most of your stoires all get a 5, this one included. Sure there are some spelling mistakes now and then but it does not really detract from the story. Will be waiting to read more. I thank you for your time and I do very much appreciate you sharing your characters with us.

Sincerely, Payenbrant.

Almost gave it a bad rating on the mobile app cause it only had the first part of the story. Glad I looked on the main site to find the rest lol. As always keep up the good work I look forward to the next chapters

The things you have to go thru just to get a piece of ass..LOL!

True About time he got her. Yet timing is whats makes the deal..

Hope to see more soon from you. Your story is quite good and well paced. Keep it coming ..

Ghost.

I have been utterly spoiled in my perception of a 'long chapter' by some of the authors I regularly read. *cough*cough*ETASKI*cough*

When you said "This one is considerably longer than most of the previous chapters" I was thinking "Okay, so it's probably 4 or 5 pages on Lit. then, right?"

Heh.

(Not that I think it's too short mind you -- just that I often forget the true difference between a page in Word/[Open/Libre]Office and a page on Lit. -- the ratio is about 5-6:1)

Also, one of the skills needed in a writer is knowing when to end a chapter, and when not to end it -- that was definitely a good time to end it.

Another great chapter to add to an outstanding story. I thoroughly enjoyed this chapter and look forward to reading many more. Thanking for sharing such a great story.

Good story, steady build up and makes sense as you read

Epic battle. - In and out of the water.

Chapeau!

And as always - waiting for more. Thx.

A Most enthralling story. Science fiction at its best IMHO. Been on this Planet 65 years and first Sci Fi I have enjoyed. BazR

When do We get more of this crack junkie needing my fix : )

Absolutely loving the story so far. I hope to see more chapters soon, at this pace I am more than happy with the fact we're getting a new chapter every few days, but I'm also impatient and want to know the full story now. I'm eagerly awaiting the rest of the story. That said... there were a few simple typos that the author might want to fix when they have time, (please not before the entirety of the story is complete though... I'm too impatient for that) such as during the fight where Liam knocked the "sir" out of Tem'ma'tel (sp?) which I feel pretty safe in believing was meant to be air.

This is by far one of the best stories in this category. Keep up the great work, you have a gift that transcends the small mistakes. I eagerly await the next installment.

Will we see the dogvaark again later?

Don't be pressured to release any faster. This is a fantastic story in all its elements, both erotica and storyline. Both are what make it so good,

Do not compromise your quality for fear of delaying the next chapters.

Yes, there are spelling errors in several chapters, but many are simply a case of the wrong word being used. One big problem with spellcheckers is that they don't catch similar words if they are spelled correctly, Grammar checkers might catch it; they might not.

I just tried WORD's spelling/grammar checker on "Her brest was bear" . It flagged "brest", suggesting it should be "Brest" but also gave "breast" as an option; it totally missed "bear".

For example:" THEIR are too many apples." Spellchecker won't flag "their" because it is spelled correctly even though it is grammatically incorrect. Other examples include:

AIR vs. ERR

BEAR vs. BARE

BREAST vs. BREST (a French port city)

YOUR vs. YOU'RE

TO, TOO, TWO

CATCH vs. KETCH

It is possible that English is not the author's first language. Let's give him a break.

NWR

Yet another high quality chapter. Please keep them coming!

Aside from your writing, which is much better than the average lit story, what I am truly appreciative of is your world building. Hearing small details, like orphans on asteroid colonies, makes me believe that this story you are fashioning for us is a true world, of which Liam is but a small part.

NT

Ah yes, the world-building.

It is for that SOLE reason that I have three rules I follow:

1. 90+% of the time, GOOD stories in the nonhuman and scifi/fantasy categories require the a greater effort on the author's part to write them than stories written for any other category, simply because good stories in these genres NEED backgrounds to be good stories.

2. 90% of the time, a story rated less than a 4.5* (after a decent number of votes -- I use at least 50) isn't going to be worth reading in these categories because it's either a niche story (very specific fetish/idea is central to the plot) or the story REALLY needs an editor, and I can't stand reading error-riddled writing -- from anyone.

*If the story is a part of a series, and later chapters tend to show a higher score, I'll give it a chance.

3. The more pages in the story, the better, GENERALLY SPEAKING. (There are exceptions to this one, but they seem to happen much less frequently than other types of exceptions.)

Best chapter yet, you had me cheering for them as they shifted from fighters to lovers. Not only do they have a different kind of love, but it is one that fits them both so very well!

Jason

Hi RipperFish,

I commented on an earlier chapter, but chapter 12 is my favorite so far. I'm not a Sci-Fi person and this is my first read in that genre. I'm very thankful that it is because if it had not been such a wonderfully written story that pulls the reader into the general story line and character play, I may have never continued to this point. I have one advantage on your previous readers...your story is now complete and I get to read it one continuous read. Ok, a little break to sleep a few hours last night.

Anyway, I am loving your writing ability, your storytelling ability, and your wonderful love/sex scenes. Very well done. I was surprised to read the warm, wonderful, full of mental, emotional, and physical desire, lust, and pure sex scenes that are so nicely placed throughout your story. But in general, I simply love your story as a whole.

I love this quote: "And in this life, the moment you have is all that you can expect."

That, was so freaking epic.

So in page 1 of ch. 12, Liam and Tem leave the other two asleep and unguarded to go explore the prospective camp site?

mentioned at the beginning of the chapter. (That WAS this chapter, wasn't it?).

I noticed it, as well. Given how security conscious they had all been, I was surprised to see it. At least it wasn't used as a vehicle for an attack. The Sarge would have kicked his own ass 'tween his shoulder blades if there was an attack after he screwed up and left them without a watch.

It IS a serious deviation from character type, as defined by the author, and would/will need to be fixed before publishing.

From comments made by RipperFish, I would think it unlikely this story will ever get published, though.

After Tem`Ma`tel and Liam see the animal on the hillside they settle in to have some food and talk a bit.

"When the others are awake I want to reconnoiter that hill back over there," Liam said, pointing his fork at a rise half a kilometer away.

The important phrase where your observations are concerned is "When the others are awake..." Liam would never leave his companions vulnerable if it could in anyway be avoided.

I think this works out to be a very fitting union of the two characters. It also works smoothly with the story line and feels very natural. Absolutely love it. I hope we'll have plenty of interpersonal development to come.

Seriously, this is good stuff. I think I might cry :'-}

DJ

that was a great chapter all of it could see it in my mind terrific writing

One Storm after another, one of weather, the other passion. Both hurricanes in intensity :)

J

Now that was a love scene!

Super hot!

I can't put this down.

I can see this in the best seller section...

5+++ stars!

Incredibly hot and about bloody time too!

Talk about intense, that was just over the top. Loved it and still love the story but looking for the other shoe to drop. Things are going too good right now and there is still a lot of story left to tell. Another five stars.

Powerful.

Kind of a unique form of foreplay. I've enjoyed all of RipperFish's stories. I wish he would come back to writing.

An absolutely beautiful tale. Been reading for hours, don’t want to stop but my eyes refuse to focus. Can’t wait for tomorrow, thank you so much for sharing.

This installment is one of my favorites. Very well done.