All Comments on 'Vanessa and Caroline'

I like humiliation but this... isn't good. Who gives in to crap like that just from getting spanked by a bare hand? Getting spanked bare handed by a girl is the gentlest form of humiliation bare handed spanks don't hurt that much especially with clothes on.

Also it would not have been that hard for her to stop her. You wrote that they were about equal in height. No one is that passive when they feel threatened and the white chick didn't even tie her up. Throughout this entire story Vanessa's reactions are entirely unrealistic and pathetic. Especially for a girl in such a high position. You don't get into positions like that without some backbone and she certainly acted like she had some up until the fantasy part of this started which only made her personality switch from irl person to blow up barbie humiliation doll all the more disconcerting.

I also feel the need to point out that a video published like that would not ruin her career. It would be proof that she was tortured and forced to do this young woman's bidding. It would be used in a court of law to put Caroline in jail. People aren't going to think less of her if she says she was overpowered. They will most likely sympathise.

You did a really good lead up. The backstory was great. The plot progressed well, I was definitely excited for a good fapothon. But once the actual humiliation started everything fell apart. Its like you wrote with sex brain I guess? The scenes sped up way too much for the previous pacing, almost all description stopped, as said before Vanessa's personality drastically shifted and she failed to do any human attempts to escape, stand up to her abuser (which is the hottest part imo), call for help, fight back, or even really physically react to any of the things being forced on her at all. It really was like she became a lifeless mannequin.

Please try to write more, but try to keep in mind that you need to keep your head even when writing out a fantasy or it comes out mushy and garbled and just.... not good.

Sad to see there was no follow up to this. A little outrageous - for my taste - with the salary/benefits demands and whatnot - little too quick. Should have just taken the job, then coerced into raises and expanded benefits over time as she got more power/control over Vanessa.

I'd love to see you pick this up again. Maybe describe how she cannot fulfill those add-on promises, so has to make it up to Caroline with some other humiliating acts (shopping trip for new wardrobe for Caroline?). Then watch as Vanessa has to make Caroline look good and accept humiliations until maybe Caroline becomes the co-dept head (which Vanessa has to plead her boss for - offering her own salary reduction to justify it), and if their new joint secretary doesn't happen to be one of Caroline's best friends... Eventually Caroline becomes dept head and Vanessa must become an assistant (who does all the work) to make Caroline and her friend look good.

Lots of ways to follow up on this. I'd love to see how you'd do it if you took it further.

I liked it but your defense of Caroline's 'racist' motivation sounded like a cop out. The dynamic between the two need to be explored further. In addition, informing us of Vanessa's undergarments but not utilizing in the narrative was a let down. I see a lot of potential in your characters.

Vanessa needs to find among her friends assertive Black women who won't take shit from Caroline. Of her boss, give her a lot of work to keep her ragged. Discipline her for the smallest thing. Tune out bully Caroline and piss her off. Take Caroline on a business trip and have her assertive Black girlfriends meet with them for dinner where Caroline will be put down each time she talks. Fuel Caroline with as much she can drink and the demands of assertive girlfriends will wear her down as she pays for the next round. One of the girls will excuse herself to go to her room and take Caroline's room card to sneak in. Put a little sex liquid in Caroline's drink and watch her start slurring words. Then, escort Caroline to her room where she will be stripped naked, have her filthy panties stuffed in mouth and position her for her first spanking by Mistress Vanessa who will become good to go and more assertive as she spanks Caroline's splayed red ass. Shaving off pussy and one of the black girls will start turning her out by licking her bare pussy. Pinching nibbles, chewing on them, spanking her fat ass and forcing her to lick pussy to perfection enforced by hard swats on ass. Forcing her to engage on tongue licking inside mouths while she fights lesbians conversion enforced by bare back whipping with a leather belt with the process repeated after much face slapping until the stresses build up to overwhelm her senses and rational thought until she is forced to submissively lick assertive Black women including Vanessa who will lay the rules she must follow including bare pussy at all times, no bra and panties, sleeveless shirts and dresses, listening to Vanessa at all times at work with respect, no white dates, spending weekend as slave to Vanessa at her house, serving food to black women who visit while accepting all forms of discipline from Black women for racism shown them in the past and serving as a domestic to Vanessa's mother who will love having a strong bare back white slave clean her house and take humiliating trash talk from her.

Beautiful! Please keep writing!!