All Comments on 'Very Rewarding Evening'

Regardless of plot, I struggled to wade through this story due to the abysmal quality of the writing. Continous tense-switching, juvenile adjectives, and a stagnant, blocky structure (without a discourse marker in sight) combine with the more common cardinals sins of missing words, poor framing of dialogue and shoddy punctuation.

As a result, you've failed to create any kind of atmosphere, plot or character development. This means that the story fails to be interesting or sexy - whichever your intent was.

I'm sorry to sound harsh, but remember that writing is a craft and a skill - maybe proof-reading and refining your work before publishing will yield more successful results in future.

One of the worst stories I have read. The writing is bad and the story may be worse. It is not sexy or hot or intriguing at all. It isn't even believable in the most fantastical way imaginable.

Appreciations for the positive feedback. No one is above criticisms so I welcome yours. Please show me your writings so I can learn from you and not make such grievous mistakes again? Thank you ( PALDIES)

Stabuiella... My writing has nothing to do woth yours. Reading mine won't make you a better writer. I understand you may be ESL, but the story switches from past tense to present so much and has a lot of incorrect usage, which makes it difficult to understand. As far as plot, I find it helpful to minimally write down a few character traits and a plot line. This helps so that you can see that the events of your story follow some kind of order amd so thar you don't make context mistakes. In my opinion, tour story had both od these problems in addition to it not being believable. Scifi stories are meant to be unbelievable, but a story with the premise of non-consensual​ sex... Usually the victim puts up a fight, which is part of the appeal to reads. This girl goes from 'I am going to call the police. I am nkt a prostitute' basically to, I am a slutty prostitute', which just doesn't jibe. The reader thinks, 'what the hell just happened?' Also, in order to make improvement, it helps to seek some advice before you publish. You can do that by seeking an editor from the volunteer editor's page or on the editor's forum in the bulletin board or by posting a small portion of tour story and asking for feedback. Of course, there are more formal ways to improve your writing as well, if you are serious or so desire. Good luck.