All Comments on 'Virginia Ménage'

by Mainefiddleheads

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  • 91 Comments
Harryin VAHarryin VAabout 8 years ago
total waste of time & effort-- where is the rebalancing the scales?

Of course the cunt whore just HAD to cheat...

Of course she just had to believe the photos and not talk to her husband

Of course there HAD to be a baby.... and it just had to be his.

And every possible convoluted story and lie the wife gave. ... The husband after knowing his wife is a liar and cheater just HAD to believe everything she said at face value...

This is a bland boring story....

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
I don't know that I could take her back, baby or not. There may be courage and....

....nobility in that.....I'm under qualified to judge.

I know I made pretty serious sacrifices for my kids, when faced with devastating circumstances......but, after a few years, I also found plenty of receptive women to comfort me and whom I was glad to comfort.

HarddaysknightHarddaysknightabout 8 years ago
My problem was

that I lost interest, or more accurately, never managed to develop any interest in the first page. It just laid there. I didn't bother with the second page. It may be a good story, but you need to grab the reader's attention in the first few paragraphs in a short story.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
Well written. But still a meh story....

But not one character was likable or interesting.

The factory accident and details were unnecessary.

The wife's reasons for cheating were pathetic.

The mother was an extremely selfish whore. Anyone close to her is a person you should avoid.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
Boring

The man cucks and whores thrive. Scales weren't much balaced...

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
OK story, but something slightly off kilter

Well it was a pretty good story, not your best, but certainly not your worst. One very big problem was the ages of the twin sisters never sync'd up right. At one point when Tammy was swimming in the pool she was a 17 yr old who had a swimming scholarship to Uva , then later when his mother moved back to NYC they still had 3 yrs of high school left.

One thing I did like being a Virginian myself, was knowing all the locations in the story, although that's neither here nor there concerning the plot, but enjoyable to me personally.

Also, was too long . I don't like to use the term fluff, as each author is certainly entitled to go into detail as much as they see fit in their stories but I feel like a lot of this was kind of circular.

I'm giving it 4*'s ( but if there were different scoring system , it more like a 3.7or8 )

Cpprcrk

impo_61impo_61about 8 years ago
A good story, a good read...

A good story, a good read...maybe a little too long, but a good read nevertheless... The ending could be this one, or any other with them staying together, since Lucy's child was his...3*

EddboyEddboyabout 8 years ago
how did they get over her

cheating? And yes the twins age confused me as well and there was no real climax to this story it was just kinda flat

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
4*s

A very emotional, interesting, and disturbing story.

Gave you 4*s. Mainefiddleheads this was very good. The dialogue was natural and consistent with the characters. Plot was entertaining and kept flowing from scene to scene. The back and forth of time episodes was a little confused. But didn't make the story to difficult to understand. You did very well in giving us a sample of the different morality the wealthy can afford to enjoy!

The only disturbing part was the very end. Why would your girlfriend/baby mama to be, inform the 18 year old twins, your young sisters, of the fornication until pregnancy plans?? That struck me as strange. Maybe it's a typo or I just misunderstood.

Hell, I don't think it is any of their business. They're on the way to college. Yep, that left me catching flys with my mouth,lol....

Between your story set in Maine and this one your ready to make money at this writing game! Thanks for the fine story Mainefiddleheads.

AMerryman

P.S. So glad I didn't listen to you,and kept reading lol!

onbothsidesonbothsidesabout 8 years ago
I wonder

So Lucy spent a lot of time talking with his mother. A mother who believed that the way to deal with a spouse's cheating is to go out and get laid.

How did Carl feel about that? How did that NOT affect his relationship with his mother?

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
sorry, only 3 from me

Lucy never did Jack shit to atone for being a whore, and I highly doubt she only fucked just the one guy and only once. She fucked the gypsy. The baby reveal play is old. It worked once this time its annoying. You are better than this.

lance_spearmanlance_spearmanabout 8 years ago
Much ado about nothing

The ending was pretty obvious half way through, but not too impressed. Plenty of angst, no real drama.

lance_spearmanlance_spearmanabout 8 years ago
Just curious about one thing

Is there really such a vehicle as a Land Ranger? Land Rover and Land Cruiser, yes; but Land Ranger?

sugnasugnaabout 8 years ago
Winding Tale

I don't really know where this one was going. It sort of meandered about and wound up as a pathetic man's fantasy. Still, I will give it a 5 for creativity and writing. As far as the family relationship stuff goes, with a mother like that, I'd rather be an orphan. She was a piece of shit and she attracted flies. Yuck.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
Great Story

Ignore the negative comments from negative people. Looking forward to reading more stories written by you.

ForensicFossilForensicFossilabout 8 years ago
Not Too Bad

End was telegraphed by about the middle, but I assume the author intended that. Not a lot of genuine emotion but, oh well.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
A long and winding road comes to mind

Get an editor. This had possibilities and those got lost in all the unnecessary words. And I don't think Carl Jr. had the stones to run anything. Not a Plant and sure as hell not a wife and a lover, both carrying his kid. In the end I disliked the story not because of the wordiness, but because there really wasn't a decent character in the entire mess to root for except, maybe, the twins. Pretty unlikeable people.

1 star.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
The lead guy is just too passive, timid, lacking confidence, and hesitant.

A good effort, and obviously taken a lot of thought. But Carl just came off as kind of a wimp, easily dominated by the women in his life, fearful of confrontation, and too timid to pursue a contentious or disturbing issue. As soon as Kathy started working for him, and Lucy did not like her, there should have been serious thorough discussions and resolution. So the eventual series of events came off as lame and contrived.

Not your best work, but it was an ambitious effort. Thanks for trying.

FD45FD45about 8 years ago
Right

I read the first page and I wanted to immediately go to the comments and praise you to the sky about a tight writing style. You had laid out all the characters, all the relationships, and essentially laid out the entire problem in one short page. I am a big fan of a tight writing style.

You used up all that good will by page 4. Dithering, diffident, dragging. Between the cheating and any resolution, there was pages. Now, some of it, I count as good use of words. I actually liked the side scene of the death in the factory and the deft use of OSHA et al jargon which was, unlike some recent stories, rather accessible.

He just let these women make these choices, directly lie to him, insult him, use him and he just sat around and took it. You can cite all the business acronyms you want, but he, for the most part, just let things happen around him. If it was not his STUPID HORRIFYING INTRUSIVE mother, it was the twins...and Kathy...and Claire...and Lucy. Very much a story of RE-action.

I think it could have lost a page. I think it could have used a protagonist instead of an observer.

I...am not going to ding you about the end. Frankly, compared to something like three pages where he is walking in parks, wandering around drunk and watching television, calling the office, wandering around drunk, and watching television...and being called by a woman who is telling him things which FUCKING AFFECT HIS LIFE as he wanders around drunk...ahem.

Did I make my point? Summarize.

Hated the mother. But she was realistic. Have no idea why Rhodes and Robert got away with things. PA Announcement: "Hello, all floor personal. Dale Rhodes. Robert whatever. I am sorry that such low curs of humanity darken our streets. If you see them, could you please tell them that I do not like them? Thank you. That is all."

When one is the major manufacturer in a small town...it is AMAZING the way things work out. You could have used a bit more of that in the story, instead of walking around drunk in his underwear, eating pizza and watching television as his mother comes over and yells at him for being him.

That said, I liked the story

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago

Good fun read but a little revenge on the teacher and the jerk who was with his mom. I never think reconciliation is good after cheating but this is one of those rare occasions I personally think it's the right thing to do.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
its always so nice

To have fine ass waiting to take a guy in when he finds his wife has a boyfriend, no matter how unrealistic, along with the unbelievable tale that she didnt hop in the sack with her real buddy, but then, had that happened Carl would have appeared more the wimp for taking her back. 3

ejsathomeejsathomeabout 8 years ago
I love your writing . . .

I love your writing and I really enjoy your stories, but this one was a bit weird. I don't think that I would have been so forgiving toward Lucy - she certainly deserved more punishment than she received. Well, I still will never stop reading your stuff. Thank you.

bruce22bruce22about 8 years ago
Interesting Story

Not as good as your other work, but still the effort to write and read. I will agree that

our hero was not very decisive and that the story line was full of interesting and distracting details but still the aftertaste was not the best.

BuzzCzarBuzzCzarabout 8 years ago
A Paper Mill

I think that's a first in an erotic story, mention of a press section. Wow. The story started pretty strong, wandered all the hell over the place for a bit. The protagonist sure did dither didn't he? Overall, I liked it. Good tale. Since I've spent most of the last 40 ear sin paper mills so I'm a bit biased. BTW, it's a mill not a plant.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
Why

Why couldn't Lucy get PG again?

patilliepatillieabout 8 years ago
Nice work Mainefiddlehead, you are on of the best new writers on here

The flow of your story, esp the first 4 or 5 pages, was very good. Entertaining & dramatic. Nice job. Ending was OK, but not a 5* effort. You are getting close though.

chilleywilleychilleywilleyabout 8 years ago
Not your best, but ok

Not enough action to cover the pages. Glad he didn't fuck Kate was it, his #2? That would be bad for business, and a cleche. Her sister was the only likable character.

I'm still a fan

Chilley

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 8 years ago
Good but..

I have given a lot of 4 star ratings to you but only 3 here.

Good and readable story but no real repercussions for the stupid bastards that were involved with destroying the marriage.

Lucy should have had her idiot head examined and I don't believe she didn't fuck Dale.

Fucking Kathy was an erotic ending that was a little satisfying but this story wasn't as good as your usual offering.

You're still very enjoyable to read.

chytownchytownalmost 8 years ago
Good Read****

You write a very entertaining story. Thanks for sharing.

rightbankrightbankalmost 8 years ago
thanks for a unique

and entertaining story

Tw0Cr0wsTw0Cr0wsalmost 8 years ago
couple things

Couldn't fit Carl in the name?

You mean to say Carla isn't good enough for her as a middle name?

What kind of idiots mess around in the marriage of the main employer in a small town?

The way he treats his employees he wouldn't even need to ask.

tazz317tazz317almost 8 years ago
THAT IS QUITE A RUN ON THE GAMUT

double adultery, cheating, lie-ing and super-stupidity, TK U MLJ LV NV

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 8 years ago
Should of Divorced Her

He would of had a much better life if he would of just divorced the cheating wife.

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
One time with Robert?

One nitpick: she only had sex with Robert the one time and Carl didn't press the issue. But when he confronted them at his apartment, she was partially undressed. Sure, the one time was possibly the truth but she certainly was intending for another round. Carl should have called BS on her.

LickideesplitLickideesplitover 7 years ago
Anon 'One time'

Anon 'One time'. Re-read that section. Sweetie admitted just exactly thst!

Re: story ... A bit too elaborate, but a good read!

AnonymousAnonymousabout 7 years ago
That was a fairly long story...

...so I might have overlooked it, but where was his revenge on Robert?

boatbummboatbummalmost 7 years ago
No Consequences For Anyone?

None for Lucy, except for a few months away from Carl in a comfy penthouse apartment in Greenwich Village while she had the baby. None for Dale, who was definitely instrumental in destroying the marriage. None for Robert who was fucking the stupid cunt. One time, my ass! She admitted that she was going for a fuck the afternoon she was caught!

I can understand Carl wanting to be there for his child, but he will never be able to trust Lucy again. So Carl is really the only person to suffer any consequences here, destined to always wonder where his wife is and who she's fucking now....

norcal62norcal62almost 7 years ago
Communication, the big one for LW story authors.

Problem is, it's usually the lack thereof the the authors use to string the story along. In this story, the number of refusals to talk is right up there with the worst of LW. Makes the males into wusses. And then, about 3/4 of the way through, the author sinks into a personal fantasy, getting the two women involved with him. BS.

The dialogue was reasonable, but Carl's times with his mother were silly. No curiosity that would make him insist on straight answers? Why rely on either very weak or over the top macho man characters. And this guy is 6'4" and muscled? How nice for the author's fantasy. Oh, and please use choose, rather than opt for.

MainefiddleheadsMainefiddleheadsalmost 7 years agoAuthor
norcal

Please write your own stories so we might see how to do it properly.

Thanks

MFH

AnonymousAnonymousover 6 years ago

This store was strange. Even a little weird at times. Not exactly what I’ve come to expect from MFH. I’m not saying it was “bad”, ..... just .... “Different”.

beretta84beretta84almost 6 years ago
when do....

dale 7 robert get what's coming to them? no way they get away with what they did.

tazz317tazz317almost 6 years ago
LOOK AT WHAT JUMPING THE GUN BEGAT

a new life time of turmoil. TK U MLJ LV NV

oldbearswitcholdbearswitchover 5 years ago
Phish? Really Ferns?

Love you Bruddah, but that took the story down a notch.

LoejtcLoejtcabout 5 years ago

"If I find out Dale Rhodes has been involved in any way with my losing my wife, there will be no place safe for him. You make sure to tell him that." That is a quote from Cal.

Yet it is clear that Dale was the instigator of Lucy's seduction by his buddy Robert. Dale was warned by Cal's mother not to try anything with Lucy or he would lose his meal ticket. But that didn't stop him from setting up Lucy with Robert. He supported the Robert's idea of following Cal and getting compromising pictures, then he agreed with Robert that Cal was probably having an affair when they both showed Lucy innocent pictures of Cal with a female member of his staff. He never suggested Lucy confront Cal. Nor did he tell his lover, Cal's mother, that Lucy believed Cal was having an affair. He was also with Robert and Lucy as they left the college knowing that Lucy and Robert were on their way to a second tryst. In essence Dale was a central part of the whole story.

Yet in the end Dave is kicked out of Cal's mother's apartment in NYC only because he had a girlfriend living with him not for his involvement in the attempted destruction of Cal's marriage. He simply disappears unscathed. Cal's threat was hollow.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 5 years ago
I Just Couldn’t Get Into It

I’ve never read a story by this author that I didn’t like—-until now. I think my biggest problem with the story is Carl Jr. his ownself. He came across as two different people at times. He was a big strong guy, talked tough, yet he let people walk all over him. His ditzy mother, his twin sisters, who were basically strangers, even his wife screwed him over, and he just rolled with it and kept letting it happen. It’s hard for me to care about a story when I can’t even generate an iota of empathy for the main character. This one just read like a bad soap opera.

0zed0zedalmost 5 years ago
I care less for wimp stories!

Pretty Lame! In fact this story could have been just as lame in four pages or less. Could see the RAAC coming & had to skim the last couple pages, but it still caused me to throw up into my mouth a little bit. I can see keeping Lucy around as a FWB/Fuk Buddy, but to stay married to the slut is totaly unaaceptable, in fact it's disgusting!

AnonymousAnonymousover 4 years ago
Just my reflections.

Many things didn't pass the suspension of belief for me. Not one of your better ones.

Dale did deserve to be run out of town, early on in the piece. If I were Carl, it would have been a 'quiet word of persuasion'. If I were Carl, it would mean fuck-all that Dale felt as if he was part of mommy's entourage. A little midnight visit by some anonymous party. A little insight to the damage he could happen to come by. Even a little assistance in the way of travel costs. As long as he got the fuck out of dodge, away from wife, mother, and sisters. And any clue he let slide as to his sudden departure would be met with an appropriate reward.

As another commentor mentioned, Dale still did have his hand deep in the cooky jar when it came to Lucy, the only thing he didn't do was use his own dick. That was only because of fear of reprisals. Helping his mate Robert may have even been a bit of revenge for that.

The real demon in the story, though, was Carl's 'mother'. Self-centered, deceitful, scheming, pushy. She was the real vehicle that brought hardship to the Harvey household.

It may possibly be true that Carl's father did have a string of hook-ups early on. However, the only evidence of that, is a single throw-away line from the woman caught in bed with another man. It's possible it's still the case. It's also very possible that it's a bare-faced lie. Mother dear doesn't seem to have a sliver of conscience anywhere in her entire being. It's also possible she is deluding herself. It is also very possible that she was led to believe it was true, by someone who had an ulterior motive.

After all, that's EXACTLY what happened to Lucy, and led to the same outcome.

It still could be the case that the father was a cad... but I don't believe that his own son would not know his father's true character. After all, once a philanderer, he would have less restrictions on his behavior now that his wife was out of the picture. And as for hooking up with the widow? Why the hell not? It's a FWB type thing, but there's a re-balance there as well. He even made sure she got some of the inheritance, which is what I would do, for a friend who had gone through the same betrayal that I had.

In contrast, his mother turns up out of the blue. Vein, entitled, irresponsible... Carl didn't even know he had sisters, until it was convenient for his mother to bring them into his life. She also brought with her the slick gypsy. This is testament to the standard of people and relationships she allowed in her own life.

So even though I make allowances for an author to create his own reality, and his own truths, nothing about that whole situation ever passes the smell test.

The other thing is that Carl, big man on campus, business leader for the community, all of a sudden is always the last to know, about ANYTHING. By his own admission. Surrounded by schemers. People with not enough respect to let him make his own decisions for his own life. The level at which he submits to this means that he is the world's biggest fool, who deserves to be cuckolded and used his entire life... or he is actually just that mentally deficient.

Another thing I disliked is the closing scenario. Wow. Sorry. You took it there? Nice fantasy. Lucky it is a fantasy, because that means it all worked out.

If he is willing to settle for that kind of arrangement, he has removed himself lock, stock and barrel from the moral high ground. Idiot.

Not saying there is any devious back-play to that scene... obviously not, this is your story. However, what idiot would pave the way, if and when the next Gypsy came sniffing around. Things change. That's life.

I have the feeling that if Carl was a working-class everyday nobody...

-He wouldn't have ever had Lucy.

-His mother would have never returned.

-The Gypsy would have never been looking for an easy ride around him.

-He wouldn't have been used for breeding stock.

Scary story, to think someone could be led along in life like that. Even if unintentional, he had no real control of any serious outcome.

Sorry, just 2 stars from me.

AnonymousAnonymousover 4 years ago
Mother?

Did mom lie on more than one occasion ? The most obvious when she told Carl that Dale was not at the NY apt. but in LA. Yet when Carl arrived at the NY apartment Dale was there fucking some broad.

AnonymousAnonymousover 4 years ago
I agree

This was not your best work .. But then again everyone misses .

AnonymousAnonymousover 4 years ago

It's a shame, really. I thoroughly enjoy your well-crafted stories, but this one missed the mark by a WIDE margin. Normally, I'll devour the entire story word for word, but I found myself skipping over portions of this due to boredom and the convoluted storyline.

SorchakSorchakover 4 years ago
Just sorta wondering

why Carl Jr. didn't make Lucy pregnant again while he was impregnating Kathy... Gotta admit, though, I too don't trust his Mom or Dale.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 4 years ago
Shame about the ending

Stuck with it, even though there were sections I just skimmed as it got a bit tedious, but the ending, really, what was that about, totally destroyed his 'moral high ground' - hence only 2*

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 4 years ago
Pretty Good Story

I liked it, didn’t have any major problems with it. Well, okay, one small thing. “Mother “. She walked out of his life when he was ten, then just sashays back more than twenty years later and acts as if it had only been a day or two? Yeah, thanks Mom, but no thanks. And the first time she waltzed into my house unannounced and uninvited would be the last time she waltzed into my house unannounced and uninvited. I gauran-damn-tee it. Entitled bitch. Other than that I kinda enjoyed the story.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 3 years ago

Really enjoyed the story but like another commentator I didn't like the epilogue. don't understand why he would do that given his very moralistic stance. It seems completely out of the character portrayed in the rest of the story. It actually felt like the author had rushed to finish the story.

AlericAlericabout 3 years ago

This was a good story. I did see something that threw me off though, how old are his sisters? At the pool party they are almost 18 and ready to graduate, but at the end of the story they have 3 more years of high school. Please explain, I'm confused.

secretsalsecretsalabout 3 years ago

Protagonist's a bit of a racist, so sympathy is on the low side to begin with. Which actually makes reconciliation easier to take, like some half-assed karmic reprisal.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 3 years ago

Two points. First, the twins went from 15 to 18 then back to 15 when Mother left for NYC.

Second, the story went off the rails with the threesome. Was a 5 before that, but the out of left field threesome (yeah, I know it was broadcast with the title) was wat too abrupt and it was out of character for all three participants.

oldmanbill69oldmanbill69almost 3 years ago

That would be a good life...sortof

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 3 years ago

Didn't understand the need for a threesome the story hadn't played that way. Got marked down for that.

Just_WordsJust_Wordsover 2 years ago

Horsefeathers?! It's been 20 years since they closed the one in Portland. I miss that place. Good story, but the ending is pure lustful fantasy. I doubt a marriage put back together after infidelity would lead to consensual adultery.

BigfundrewBigfundrewover 2 years ago

A few bits of weirdness throughout, but pretty good. Main character's Mother sure enjoys leaving her children..and taught her daughter-in-law how to run and hide when pregnant. Everyone considered the main character last...in every decision...all the women in his life made the decisions....then told him what was going to happen.

AnonymousAnonymousover 2 years ago

Horrible torture story of a man.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 2 years ago

When Eleanor grew up, did she become the first female who actually gave a fuck what Carl thought or wanted? My best example is that while he didn't want his wife near his mother's lover, neither woman felt that his thoughts carried any weight. I don't blame the twins for not caring about their brothers opinions or desires because, well, I have three sisters of my own and that comes with the territory.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 2 years ago

Thank you for consideration of the child, so many comments on here are to btb and they give no consideration to how that affects the child no matter the parentage. Children don't ask to be born yet they bare the consequences. And so many of these assholes just say fuck 'em. Those are scum who who should not procreate and infect the gene pool.

Demosthenes384bcDemosthenes384bcabout 2 years ago

Plot got a little too convoluted for me in this one. 4*

ZippityDoDaDayZippityDoDaDayalmost 2 years ago

Was going well until you added in Kathy at the end. You don't have baby making sex with anybody but your spouse, especially when the other one cheated already and had a big pregnancy scare.

AngelRiderAngelRideralmost 2 years ago

This was pretty horrible

eljj546eljj546almost 2 years ago
Carl Jr?

I'll have two cheeseburgers, order of fries, and a large strawberry shake 😁

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 2 years ago

Pretty good. Hope the ménage stayed active.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 2 years ago

"The doctor I am seeing says a paternity test is risky because it is an invasive procedure so I won't know until she is born."

Non-Invasive Prenatal Paternity Testing

The test can be performed as early as the 7th week of pregnancy, meaning you can choose to confirm who the father is nearly immediately after your pregnancy is confirmed. Unlike outdated methods for determining paternity like amniocentesis or a CVS (Chorionic Villus Sampling) test that can cause a miscarriage, a prenatal DNA is completely non-invasive and safe for both mother and fetus.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

For a dude who has to be in charge of a business operation responsible for 450 jobs in a small town...decisive and confident in decision making. He sure is a total pushover with every other interpersonal relationship he has.

I was close to my mother God rest her soul. Respectful and loving as a son should be. She was faithful and good to my father in their nearly 50 years together. A good woman. A good mother.

IF she had cheated on my father. Left and abandoned him and myself and siblings for more than a decade?

Let's just say I would have been less than respectful to her. Her opinion would have meant shit to me. And I would have been very clear to her that she would NOT be welcome in my home. Around my land/farm/buildings/business. And definitely NOT welcome to have a relationship with my wife.

If she didn't get the message the first time? Well I would have been a bit louder and forceful the next time. Probably used the phrases and words "liar. Cheater. Miserable diseased cunt. Betrayal. Slut. Skank."

What kind of woman walks out, and never attempts to contact her son? Not even once time? Gives birth to his sisters and never let's him know he has twin sisters?

I'll tell what kind of woman. A self absorbed narcissist slut cunt who does not deserve to have a relationship with her son and his ffamily. Most men would tell the horrible excuse as a mother to gtfo and to not let the door hit her in the ass on her way out of my wedding ceremony and life.

And if my newly married wife cannot abide my wishes when it comes to staying the fuck away from my lying mother?

Well that's what annulments are for.

Where the fuck is his balls? He just let's his mother back into his life? She just waltzes into his house any time she wants? Walks right in like she owns the place? For fucks sakes.

I had a great relationship with my mom. Big ffamily. NEVER once as an adult did my mom ever just show up to my home and walk right in? And after I moved out of her home as a married man? I didn't just waltz my ass back into my parents front door without knocking or ringing rhe bell first. Why? It's called respect.

And every character in this story had zero for Carl Jr.

I'm a big fan of this author. But this story fell flat for me.

And if he was 6'4", 220 and a gym rat? It would have been rather easy to express in a very direct way to the gypsy mother fucker that if he was found alone within 5 feet of the wife? That he'd physically be sorry. Utterly regret it. There was no relationship, friendship, inside jokes, or even lingering eye contact. If the MC found ANY kind of contact between the two of them? Phone calls. Text messages. Emails. Lunches. Anything. He'd make sure the guy would be sipping his meals through a straw. A message such as this delivered while gripping the slimy bastard's hand in a strong handshake? Whilst staring him directly in the eyes? Is usually VERY effective in terms of messages received. Also a comment about the chastity of his sisters should never being compromised would not hurt.

There message delivered to the meddling bitch who gave birth to him "stay away from me, my home, my wife and my life." She stays away. Message delivered to new wife "stay away from my mother." And the implication is "we can get this shit annulled at any time if you can't stay away from my cheating lying mother." And message delivered to asshole fucking my mom. "Stay the fuck away from my wife and out of my life." I guarantee men such as him? He values his balls and good looks too much to stop the gravy train he's got going with the old slut. He knows he'll have to run for his life if he's ever caught with the wife.

There. Easy peasy. Now all things clear. Lines drawn. Mother moves into the farm place next door. But she might as well still be living in NYC the good it does being close to me. Because if it were me? I have zero need for proven lying cheaters to be in my life. Most people don't need toxic people like this in their life.

As for a comment made 4 months ago by an anonymous. About consideration of the child.

Go fuck yourself. A woman in her 30s who has unprotected sex with another man...puts herself into the position to have sex like that? Knows she might get pregnant. Isn't some vapid clueless 17 year old. Knows the consequences of that action. Stupid bitch.

If the kid was not his? He has zero fucking obligation to her or the kid. He owes her whatever the prenuptial agreement holds him to with regards to her adulterous actions. And there WOULD have been a prenupt with him in line to inherit the factory, business and assets. And her being a glorified secretary with zero assets.

So...she gets a little payout. Title to her automobile. And her walking papers as a single mother. Good luck to you.

Maybe she could shack up with his slut mom? That would be a great home...gold digging men coming and going. 2 sluts living the dream helping to raise Robert's bastard.

And this wealthy and attractive man goes back on the market. Probably married to the much better and much more loyal Kathy. With aot more in common. And happier.

He doesn't owe the slut or her bastard kid ANYTHING. And frankly anyone who whines about "the baby is innocent" is one of 3 things.

Is a lying cheating slut who fucks around on a husband and has probably wondered at least a time or two about the parentage of her own offspring and deep down is guilty and thinks women who cheat and make cucks of their husband should be forgiven.

Is a pathetic cuckold himself and lives every day with the twisted abnormal shame of being a knowing beta and tries to convince himself and everyone else that raising another man's child makes him some kind of strong guy. Hahahaha. Let me be clear. Marrying someone who has children from a previous marriage or relationship is not what I'm talking about. It's "my wife fucks other men and got pregnant by someone else while married to me. And I stayed and love her and don't care that she is a cheating cunt who doesn't respect me at all." Everyone just laughs at you.

Or you are guilty of being ignorant and obviously have never raised a child. You do not realize how challenging being a parent is. How expensive it is. How much effort and time is required to raise children. If you actually knew how the day to day responsibilities weigh on you. Looking into the eyes everyday of a child/teenager who obviously isn't yours...the child knows it. You know it. And your lying cheating wife knows it? It would be a cancerous growth in that home and family. It would grow. Fester. Mastastitize. Eventually would kill the entire thing.

So fuck off about "the innocent child". That baby wouldn't know any different. It'd be a child of a single mom just like tens of thousands of other babies born every year.

In this case mom goes to work. Probably moves close to her sister and other family. To help with the child. And she does her best living with regret. Life goes on.

That's not how this story turned out. But passing judgement on what the natural response by 99 percent of all men and society? If there is a man who can accept it? And actually forgive a wife? And keep his self respect? More power to him I guess. But that is the rare exception. Not the rule.

Getting pregnant by a man not your husband (unless at a fertility clinic)...or even getting pregnant and not being sure if the baby growing in your womb is your husband's? Even wondering about paternity says a lot about a woman, her relationship with husband, and her own mental and emotional health.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Prenatal testing is almost never invasive and poses no risk for the fetus except in extreme circumstances. This was just a forced plot device to make the separation longer. Wasted 6-7 months over this. Lame. As usual another wife (only married 3 years this time) who is convinced her husband is cheating based on some amateur photographs, and the guy who tells her there is a problem, ends up fucking her. Way to go!

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

This story is well below your usual quality.

The storyline is just feeble and so unbelievable it borders on fantasy, not fiction. And the main character is just a walking talking emasculated weak cartoon character.

Carl is too too goody two shoes to be true.

He is too weak and indecisive to be the boss of 450 people.

He is too gullible to run a business.

Nothing written about him flows cohesively, it is all a maelstrom of contradictions.

bigurnbigurnover 1 year ago

3 stars, that's all I can say about the way the story unfolded. That should have been Robert who, somehow stumbled into the line machinery. Maybe Lucy and Dale as well. Some sick, double murder, suicide possibly. That storyline could have been set up just after little Eleanor's second birthday. I say this folks, because in the real world ... Actions have consequences...

davezqdavezqover 1 year ago

Didnt resolve the trust issue between Daddy Bro and Lucy. Sounded like it was big enough to split the marriage. They just let it all drift along?

AnonymousAnonymousabout 1 year ago

The whole "paternity testing is invasive and dangerous" was total crap. The odds of such testing harming the fetus is extremely low. Thr fact that his wide quotes it as a matter of fact from a doctor makes it even worse. Transparent plot device to force the separation to be longer and for.her and Kathy to become friends. Minus one star. And also her seeing pictured of him with Kathy at a hotel in a restaurant but nothing else beyond a tame kiss is lunacy to cheat. Worse she did it once while high and drunk with the asshole who tricked her, but she went back for seconds. Guess she wasn't that guilty, huh? And probably enjoyed it. Thr amateur photographs from then asshole's "friend" were ridiculous. Show proof of sex or emails or texts that show proof of sexual activity of hire a PI yo get it. Wife was insecure, stupid, and naive and did not trust her husband enough to even confront him. Weak sauce. Yeah the kid is his and all is well. Good writer but not one of his best works. Yeahnshe did it one time, but she was going back for seconds, and if he didn't discover what was happening, how many times? No discussion of what she did that night. Why she went back a second time except she was pissed. And why no protection (guess drunk). Was she going to use protection a second time? Lot of holes in items that WOULD get discussed in real life. Protagonist was a saint.

SmellerSmellerabout 1 year ago

So no revenge on Robert or Dale whatsoever? Pretty wimpy considering one lied to and fucked the wife while the other made the introduction and helped with the seduction.

You can even forgive the first time that she fucked Robert because she was inebriated and he probably wasn't. But the second time she was completely sober. That would've ended the marriage for me.

ImNotanAnonImNotanAnonabout 1 year ago

I suppose this was your one foray into cuckdom. Needless to say, it failed miserably.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 1 year ago

Lol. Paternity test is invasive and dangerous. What a quack doctor. Absurd. They are done all the time. Artificial plot device to force separation. And after all their problems and work to reconcile, then he beds Kathy during six ovulation cycles to impregnate her? That came out of left field.

AnonymousAnonymous12 months ago

Fine until the totally unnecessary, unbelievable and incongruous polyamory.

🌟🌟🌟

WillupbossWillupboss11 months ago

I’ve read all your stories and this is one of the best ones yet! Thanks for writing.

AnonymousAnonymous8 months ago

Weak male character. Needlessly long and tedious. Brain dead wife should have become an ex-wife.

AnonymousAnonymous8 months ago

Was entertaining but the doctor claiming a paternity test is invasive and can hurt the baby knocked it down a star. Lucy was not a bad person, but she was stupid. Fortunately she was very remorseful afterwards. But the waiting til the delivery of the baby was a strange plot artifice.

AnonymousAnonymous8 months ago

Loved it. Good job.

SorchakSorchak6 months ago

I know it's minor and petty, but my bitch is the repeated use of the spelling of gypsy with an 'ie' at the end. Like those people who spell panty (the proper way), pantie (the wrong way).

AnonymousAnonymous6 months ago

Many things about this tale are disquieting. Left with far too many gaps and not enough answers. Really I would t have been surprised to find out that he wasn't even related to the two twins, that's how unbelievable his mother is. Not sure a single true word ever purposefully came out if her mouth, as for the wife ....

AnonymousAnonymous4 months ago

Why do this author's always write a wimpy cuck husband if it's going to be a reconciliation story? Do They secretly enjoy being cucked?

hoolabihoolabi4 months ago

Cuck obsessed story

AnonymousAnonymous2 months ago

Beat the crap out of both the bastards, 1 for the “I didn’t know she was married” toss of Lucy under the bus, 2 for the enabling bastard gipsy. 5

AnonymousAnonymous24 days ago

The ending ruined a good story.

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Not a great story. Carl was a real wimp. His mother WAS nuts. Lucy was an immature slut.

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But fucking and impregnating Kathy in the end was pure adolescent fantasy…and cheapened the story.

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2 **

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