All Comments on 'Walking on the Darker Side Ch. 03'

I'm struck with the consistency found in these three chapters. Your character has a distinct and marked lack of empathy, he shows no emotions or emotional responses. He doesn't even show that he is getting off on her pain. It's like he's demonstrating the control and power, to bring her misery, pain or pleasure. Whatever she feels good or bad has no effect on him.

You write about the physical signs of her emotions, but again, they simply exist, they are not remarked upon or interacted with.

I think this story is mislabeled. It is not BDSM when a sociopath gets a hold of a disconnected and neglected high school student. That's erotic horror. Your story is not about power exchange, nor is it about consent. The sociopath is the master manipulator, not a consent builder.

And last, do we really have to know every damn detail about cooking breakfast, grilling burgers, prepping with condiments? No, we really do not. This kind of obsessive attention to inconsequential detail, coupled with the lack of empathy, makes me wonder where you fall on the Aspergers continuum.

Well, I can kind of see where GrumpyGampy is coming from on this. I haven't read the previous chapters, but wanted to comment before I checked out the first. (I want to see how this unfortunate kid ends up in the basement) Considering the mood of the piece, I think I understand the detail that went into the meal scene. I didn't find any of it sexually stimulating at all. Like watching a train wreck, however, I couldn't turn away. Physical pain is not my idea of a good time. On the other hand, lots of people are turned on by it. What I liked best was the whole concept of control, and the fact the third chapter can stand on its own without reading the previous two. The real question in my mind comes down to this- Was It Well Written? I think the answer is an obvious yes!

Please, please, please, continue this? A very erotic story, and the needle play is a turn on. Thank You.

what happened to chapter 2?

wont read 3 without 2. bummer really liked the beginning.

And, i was definetly bored when you explained the breakfast and lunch making. That did absolutly nothing to futher or conpliment the story. It was just kind of there.

Also, i 100% with the comment saying how scary the "master" is... He doesnt seem to care at all about the girl's feelings or well-being- and it would hurt like a mofo to swim in a chlorine pool right after yanking all those needles out of her O_O

This is the first time I remember an author leaving out a chapter. No chapter 2?????

It makes me angry when authors post multi-part stories and take months to post the last chapter. You have set a new low - Posting chapter 1 and 3 with no chapter 2. I started to read 3 but stopped, realizing I lost interest in not knowing how he got her back to his farm. A couple of other things for the "Cop" show people. Wouldn't you be suspect number one when they read your e-mails? Even with your fake last one, they'd look at you. And wouldn't they look at the cameras from the stores and areas you didn't use and see your vehicle? And then a little search of your house and farm and you, my not-so-clever-friend, are going to jail. BAH!