All Comments on 'Was It Worth It? Ch.01'

Lots of good detail and descriptions, with interesting characters, but is actually too much. Being entirely third person and hearing everyone's thoughts is overload and distracting. Pick a main character and tell us from their perspective what's going on. It's okay to switch perspectives, but it felt wrong walking away from the action with our first main character, yet staying with the action at the same time.

Far too long an intro! Got bored real quick!