All Comments on 'Water and Stone'

Ignore the other comment please, I would definitely like to see this continue.

I liked this alot. Well written and a good plot. I liked the realism of the story and the sex writing was better than many. Romance is a good place for it. More please :-)

This was GREAT! And, I'm a Lit editor, but quite frankly there were just a few things I thought might need an editor's assistance, and only if you wanted such: misspellings in a couple of places and just a bit of brevity in a place or two, again only if you wanted. The thing is, it's your writing style and it's your story; so what if impatient readers want more and want it fast. Best wishes and keep up the GREAT! WOW! writing.

I could not stop reading this story, once started; except, last night when I discovered it and started reading, I had to do so but only when my eyelids wouldn't stop closing down. I had to sleep. This am, I was supposed to go and do errands and stuff on my day off today; instead, I sat down this morning with coffee in hand, sipping and thinking I'd just read a bit more.... Hah. I couldn't put down until I reached the end. I'm a picky reader, so it might be saying something that I could not stop reading. You have a wonderful writing style, and the story unfolds beautifully, with a lot of clear images from your well-written descriptions, going through my head as I read on. Anyway. I'm sure you're an accomplished writer. Perhaps this is a new genre into which you're branching out. Or something. More power to you!

Could not stop reading! Am so glad they had so much patience with each other and that you took the time and space to tell their story. It was beautiful!

good story for a 1st time writer. Hope there will be a part 2 about the future.

Perfectly paced, beautifully realised story which draws the reader in as the main protagonists reveal more of themselves to each other and start to find a possible long term future together.

Ignore the nay sayers a couple of grammatical errors in 13 'pages' on Literotica is nothing.

I look forward to seeing more of your work, it will be good to see more 'real' romance here.

story, ignore the critics who are far to keen to knock things they couldn't do in a million years.

Well detailed, well paced and you gave us good characters. I look forward to your next piece

Excellent story. I would have wished for more sex, but in the Romance category, there doesn't need to be all that much. Very good first story, and I look forward to reading lots more from you.

Thanks!

...though you sure don't seem like the typical first-time writer here.

I gave you 4* easily and debated 5*. I think I took a point off for not letting us see more of how their relationship changed and developed further once she was able to get over the orgasm hurdle after their trip.

It was very good to understand her emotional and self-confidence issues and just how profoundly they affected her - and it was great to see her begin to get past them.

What I'd hoped to see/hear, though, was that next part of the healing therapy that real actual love can bring to two wounded souls. Possibilities emerge from shadows where they'd been lost and forgotten about, and the previously desolate landscapes of lives can begin to become tapestries of color - landscapes filling anew with unexpected growth and beauty. The previous pain and scars on the landscape, getting filled with strong new growth - sometimes nearly to the point of being forgotten about entirely.

That was the pert of theyr story I'd hoped to hear. Perhaps in a future installment?

An excellent first story. Yes, there are some grammatical errors, and the text could be tightened up with some editing. Yes, there is a rather abrupt move from the first orgasm to the conclusion and it would have been good to know how the couple moved into the "partner" space.

This is a great start, and I look forward to your next endeavour - perhaps it could address the gap at the end.

Your writing shows talent. Please keep up the good work!

You have a good hold on your writing skills, no doubt. But every story needs a twist or a conflict to make it interesting. Your story seems like record of events. And I also agree with the person who said that many of the lines were just fillers which didn't contribute to the story. But its nothing that a good editor can't fix.

Also, to those who are saying, "ignore the other critics, they can't do anything...", everyone's opinion matters, just like yours does.

Good luck on your future stories, RockChaser.

Wishing you all the best,

Ronnie Debb (a.k.a The Vindicator)

I really liked the story, although I suppose it could have been a bit shorter, the characters were well developed and that is what makes it interesting. You should write a sequel dealing with the developing relationship, does she change, or do they live separately, which seems unlikely. There is little doubt they are "together" for the long haul, but the details are much less clear.

I also really liked the story. Although long, it was worth it to me. I'd also like to see a continuation to show the development of their relationship after that camping trip, since it seems they are really together at your ending.

Everyone's feedback on my first story has been a great help as I try to finish some others up. I didn't have any immediate plans to continue this one, but you've made me think about it!

Best wishes.

This story tugged at my heartstrings. It was very pleasing to see two "broken" people connect in such a meaningful way. I hope you continue to tell their story , or even the story of others getting together. Well done !!!!

Thank you for using your writing skills to show living skills; that obstacles to togetherness can be overcome with courage and empathy.

You opened the door for so much more of their developing love story. Your discriptions of Alexa's world while they hiked and camped was wonderful, thought I was there with them. I truely hope you will add another chapter or two. Hmm, maybe a threesome with that cute little lady at his work, turns out she loves to hike and camp.

Excellent first story, hope to read many more from you.

I really enjoyed this story of two tortured souls finding their way to each other. Speaks to me personally. The length of it was needed for the necessarily slow way of opening up, in my eyes (though the closing seemed just a little rushed). I found it to be a really intriguing paradox of intimacy that Alexa and Kevin shared. Nice character design, interesting plot, well written with good proportions of dialog, inner monologue, and description. Thank you, again.

- R

So well done!

You did a wonderful job on this story. You can tell by the emotions it bring up in me. Write more about these two!

Imagine, 13 pages and almost nothing happens. I'm glad I didn't read every word on every page. Two unhappy people share their woes in a long drawn-out, tedious fashion. Time to move on to a more rewarding author.

Reading this story was an amazing journey, quite unexpected turns evoking emotions that I have suppressed for so long. The descriptions of Kevin's feelings & emotions seemed to flow thru me. You are an excellent storyteller. One of the BEST stories I have ever read. Thank You

Some don't like long stories, period. As long as you warn them, they shouldn't get to the end and complain that it's too long. That said, I love these two very deep characters, both damaged but interesting in their own way. You did a great job of exploring them, and I encourage you to continue their story. In a sap sometimes, and truly think these two deserve a happy ending that would align with their uniqueness. Thank you for sharing!

While this may be your first story on Literotica, I find it hard to believe you aren't a writer in other genres. Your wordsmithing skills are excellent! I've read some of the negative comments and while they may have some (very minor) points, I rank the success of a story on whether the author makes me care about what happens to the characters. You did that very well for me. I'd like to know what happens next!

Sex is really about the mind, not the body parts. They are only the tools. I do not agree with the complaint about "nothing happened". More happened with these two characters than 98% of the stories on this site. This was emotionally draining to read, and I can only imagine what it was like to write. But it was deeply satisfying and it was among the top ten I have read on this site, It was very deep, but realistic. Both characters were highly motivated to solve some of their issues boiling over from the past. It is very hard work to do this and that came through in the writing. The length was necessary, but it probably would have worked in about 5 or 6 chapters as well. The only problem with that is that the readers would have had to wait for them and when it is this complex it works better as one long story so readers do not lose the thread. The story itself was far better than the few edits that required the reader to stop a moment and analyze the intent, but an editor might have helped that. At any rate 5* for you my friend. Congratulations!

You are an IDIOT that wouldn't know a good story if it bit you in the ass!!! The author here has one hell of a good story here with all kinds of action going on, you're just to much of an idiot to understand it, I have to say you're probably a young idiot with no understanding of real life...

I also notice that you don't have any stories of your own on here, let's see you write something better before you start criticizing someone else's stories!

A suggestion, not a criticism. Some have mentioned the length, rather than length I think it was the pacing. Some passages seemed repetitive, but in real life, that is sometimes the way it is. It could also have been the way it was left, unresolved, incomplete. Again just like real life. We should always working on ourselves and our relationships. Perhaps that too will come with experience.

thanks for the story

I'm supposed to be working now, but just couldn't put the story down!

I'm on the cliff above the pacific and the fog has retreated..

Need to go and look down at the ocean, then forge some steel.

I'm sorry, I may have simply overlooked it, but I couldn't find the ending to this story.

You know, "ending", the part of the story where it comes to a logical conclusion and then stops. I read all 13 pages and was mildly entertained but the final few paragraphs of the last page kind of threw me for a loop. I kept thinking there had to be more left of this story. But there wasn't. Isn't. Too bad.

Love your writing style. Stories well crafted, then your muse seems to skip out a little early. Not that uncommon even with some of the better lit authors. Seem in haste to tie up a couple loose ends, then move on to next project, or perhaps back to real life demands. Still 5* for me. Only read Strangeness and Water so far. Strangeness a bit like Twilight as each sensitive person has some unique skill. Intentional?

And I enjoyed it a lot. Until I began to think that there were things going on within the story, in the writer’s mind, that the writer wasn’t putting down on paper, so to speak. And the last little bit, what followed the “Four Months Later” heading, made absolutely no sense. Maybe it’s just one of those “You Had To Be There” stories. Anyway, a long way to go for such a strange ending.

The story became about one thing. Orgasm, romance, and vaginal penetration. There was the first, but disappointing in the second, and the third's consummation was merely teased. Which is disappointing, because the story was written where the climax was nearly continuous for three pages before the epilogue. Good writing, a bit too much contempt for the reader in the plot's creation. "I can make a perfect story, and I know it, so I'll do it and totally ruin the ending after the reader gets through thirteen pages, and I have 100 more where that came from."

so tender, so strong. I miss Alexa and Kevin already: Hi there, you two! How have you been the last four years?

At first I did not dare to read this story. Your first story here. It seemed very personal. To read the beginning was like a blow, I almost felt the pain.

You find the metaphors and stories to give beautiful words to my feelings.

Thank you so much.

So glad to have found this. It's a wonderful story. Please ignore anything negative in some others' comments. The ending is beautiful. The whole psychology is believable with so much beauty. Thank you!