All Comments on 'We Need to Talk, Darling'

Poor twat probably believes all the advertisments she sees on the telly. Sounds like the husband is about to trade up.

not funny... not humorous... just awful

Very humerous indeed. Beware the greener grass, particularly when someone else is telling you how green it is and you have to take their word for it.

I'd like to see a part 2 telling about Laura's awakening.

. . . and most of the ten inchers are dating the five feet tall, one hundred five pound girls who wear the thirty-two triple E bras. Yes, there are a very few tens, a few more nines, and a good smattering of eights. The real question is, how many of the big ones can write a pretty good story that is fun to read.

I don't know what the others complained about. She cockily showed him no respect and damn well went out on a date to get fucked...some loving wife - NOT!

Delia arriving and keeping house, Phillip not giving Laura any room to babble, dribble, complain or make excuses - Great...Loved it they way he calmly walked her to the door and pushed her out...and...with his suggestions for what she could do!

Thanks for a good and fun read...AND - NO Wimp!

Either she was stone cold stupid, or so naive that she would believe anything anyone wanted to tell her.

Thanks for the good read.

ha

B,

She tried to sell it, or at least she got "sold" on some strange! She bought it and tried to re-sell it and it "Killed" her to find out she was so wrong! At least he characterized her as "Not the Brightest Apple in the barrel". So, what will become of her? Will Britease have her trying to hang horns on him again OR........ will she try to hang the "Blue Ribbon" on him (or his "thingy") as the true Love artist in her group. Stay tuned and perhaps She'll do, Pt 2.....

Look at it as humorous fiction guys, it is what it is.

Thanks for sharing on Lit. Britease!

x

You follow-up and let us know how everyone fared after the Debacle of Lauras night out and how she took Delias exolanation of what her and Phillips night out or in as it may be But it would be a fun read and a Nice Epilogue to the story.

funny, sweet, hilarious, even, and still quite believable.

thank you.

Good to see you back Brit. Another good tongue in....cheek? lol story.

I do so like your sense of humour.

Full marks keep'em coming.

Amanda

I like your fun stories about real men very much, not that wimp stories other authors try to sell us.

He has no evidence against her except hearsay, but she has a witness, maybe even a camera at home. It sounds like he will be taken to the cleaner. Lots of fun! Seriously though having a stupid partner is as dangerous as having one who wants to play around.....

Enjoyed the hell out of it!

I loved it.

Normal men of the world stand up and be counter!

Let's see, HarryVA says it is a bad story while 14 other readers thought it was funny and enjoyable. One, missed that it was a light and humorous story and was concerned that Phillip would get taken to the cleaners (huh?), so I disregarded his comment. Perhaps I should excuse Harry's vote as well, as he nearly always is full of shit.

humorous as hell. The dry British humor really shines in this little gem. Thanks!

Well written, funny, and the clueless wife got her just desserts. Really, what's not to like?

Thank you! A very nice wake up story. It put a smile that I am sure will remain on my face all day whenever I think about or am reminded about you story. Great job.

Hah! Taught her right. Cute tale.

And you know it. We all thoroughly enjoy your work. I used to date Anne: gorgeous, social, sexual athlete, but could be embarrassing in public conversation.

HarryinVA nust have been in a hurry -- I've never seen such brevity from him, especially when he doesn't like a story.

... when I see one of your submissions. This one lives up to your high standards!

Thanks for sharing

I enjoyed it, as apparently, everybody but Harry did. I do get put off by the mythical proportions of body, wealth and fitness some claim for the characters in their stories.

I think it would be a good follow up to have the husband teach the wife new tricks. I think it would be fun writing it too. Even a third one where the student exceeds the teacher as in Pygmalion.

Two things:

I've worked for the Federal Census bureau where it was me and 2 other guys and 300+ women and later in life at an Union shop where it was 150 guys and 5 women. The job for the government was far worse as far as social interaction. It seems that with "enough" women working together the brakes come completely off in the conversations.

My personal experience with this taught me that women are more likely to discuss things liberally that men would avoid. So I found humor at the start of the story where the wife is trying to "delicately" explain what she's been telling her friends.

The other thing is, and I hope I'm right, this seemed more like a poke at stories where the husband sits on his thumbs while the wife runs off and gets the good stuff from other men and then he tries to save the marriage after she's done. Its more of a "Be satisfied with what you have at home" type of story with humor mixed in.

I tried not to get caught at work, but I laughed my butt off at some of the humor. (^_^)

-Risq

Lol funny!

Laura is both stupid and arrogant. Flagrantly so. Ridiculously so, which sets the proper tone. It's a dangerous combination as she finds out. Delia is delightful as Phillip's rescuer. I have to wonder a bit how it would have turned out if Delia hadn't shown up because Phillip seems a bit clueless, the typical Britrease helpless male. But she did and that turns the story completely around. It turns out Phillip is quite the stud and Laura is apparently a cold, dumb fish. Phillip finds his balls by fucking Delia. Laura gets summarily dismissed still not having a clue and Phillip and Delia fuck triumphantly off into the night. Life is good! <br><br>

The only difference in this story from a typical Britease story is the rescuer. Suppose there was no Delia and when Laura came home Phillip threw her our, EXACTLY as he did in this story? Does Phillip need a woman to make him act like a man? Hmmmmmmm? <br><br>

Questions aside, it was a funny story. Thanks.

You have put a smile on my face in an otherwise dull day!

Well done. Thank you for the chuckle.

The dry British humor really come through. Nicely done!

Who knew a story of adultery could turn out to be a fun story?

An epilogue would be nice where Delia would be telling all of her girl friends, including Laura, about the wonderful time that she had with Laura's husband.

A fun little story. I enjoyed it very much. Not quite as good as HDK but then who is? After all he is the master of tongue in cheek stories. Thank you for the entertainment. Always good interesting stories.

Thanks for sharing. The old 'grass might be greener' adage got a good shakedown in this tale...

H -

Whether this is a true story or not (as hinted at at the very end) it was a really good and funny story. Remember the immortal words of Stewie G. "Mark my words, when you least expect it your upance will come". Those words hold true in this story. You can also phrase it as 'we reap what we sow'. Just one small problem to this story. It needs another chapter, to explain what happens to him and his idiot wife Laura. Also, what happened to thier all girls group when Laura finally realizes that she has been conned by her so-called friends...whom all, it seems, have lied through there teeth.

I loved it. It was well written and displayed a very dry wit.

Is there a part 2 out there?

Great set up, terrific twists, and a very eccentric sense of humor. Thank you, Britease for writing a very clever story and generously allowing me to relish in your talents.

Really fun and clever. I was pulled in by his dejection at the beginning. His later triumph was certainly well-deserved. Especially since he had predicted all that his wife experienced.

Lots of humor, and a great twist.

I enjoyed the whole story.

I was getting hot under collar because it looked like another wimp/slut story, but you sure did pull it out (or push though, wink wink) at the end.

I do hope that Laura does find her 12"x8" curved pole.

And fun to read. Thanks.

I enjoyed that - about time that someone got it back - in spades !!

....perhaps the most realistic. Still, I can't get past the way your characters speak and behave like they live in the 1800s.The brits I know are more guttural and to the point."Wha the fuck wench,you believe tha shit?" Just once will you write a character that is sure of himself. Until then, harry will be on you like another man's spunk on a cuck!

Like to hear how his Wife took it. after she finds out her Friend Delia slept with her Guy and Bragged to her other Friends to find out they are trying for a Piece of her Ex.

You truly are an amazing writer. How in heavens do you scale your adultresses personalities so well in American Dream she was a total looser and slut that I had no feelings for in this one same adultry and this one I feel pity for her. Lovely writing and wonderful charators even the Ugly ones LOL

BTW spelling from an iPhone doesn't count. huge fingers small buttons

but your husband is a fucking dweeb and would never ever get dalia into his bed. His wife lays that shit on him and he goes to the pub ? wtf.

Its really sad what stupid stories get high votes on this page only because there is revenge somewhere in the story.

So that is what a loving wife does. Listen to her friends and then cheats on her husband. Well he got the better bargain.

About the Britt's - Well they invented the the language but the Americans corrected it and made it the language of the world without invading, raping, stealing and killing millions of people.

and one walking who wasnt but wanted to. TK U MLJ LV NV

I enjoyed reading this as it tapped out a rhythm on my funny bone.

I enjoyed the light read. Thank you for a Five Star shortie!

A stupid cheating wife. Can you believe it? I guess no loud screaming orgasm for her.

Cunt

Women could piss into the wind! Great read

My congratulations on a very amusing Loving Wives tale. It helps that the wife concerned isn't exactly a full shilling. Your concern of the length of the story is unfounded. It ended where it should have ended any form of explanation, justification or continuation of the story would rob it of its humor and the mental image left at the end. Finishing as you did the reader could interpenetrate the conclusion as they imagined it to be,Thanks for sharing I thoroughly enjoyed your story,

So it's okay for the husband to cheat but when the wife does it it leads to divorce?

Please explain the logic beihind this

@ Fithing41 That woman who does not divorce from her cheating bastard husband that is same wimp as the wimp husbands are.....................

Looks like Laura ended up with the "short" end of the stick after all.

Women as audacious and vindictive as Laura only exist as words strung together by literary artists; even if they are real, they are extremely rare oddities. These women shouldn't be vilified but ridiculed because they clearly lack a functioning brain.

@ Dear Fighting41 If you had read more revenge stories you would have known one of the the modern revenge weapons (not violance or murder) that the betrayed husband gathers evidence about the loverboy and he shows to the loverboy's wife. In the stories the wife of the loverboy takes the husband to cleaners and earns the children custody.........

I loved this, my husband is called Phil (spurs fan) and when I read it too him he just said. careful what you wish for, shame the gooner got the girl.

Very funny and very good

Infuriatingly hilarious.

genuinely dry humour. Loved it!

That was pretty funny. Wish I could have seen the expression on the wife's face when he showed her the door. Bloody well done!

Said the judge as he granted the divorce decree.

HA Ha ha

but needed a bit more meat.

First. What a stupid woman. Enough said. The rest of the story as written was one of the funniest things I ever read. Some times I almost needed a dictionary to figure out the colorful metaphors. Is there a Queens English to American English translator somewhere?? LOL.

Can't say I like all your writing, but this story made my day. 5 stars.

Trust...but verify!

Big tits are nice...but common sense and decency are critical! Especially if the alternative can suck-start a Harley!

Very enjoyable! Thanks!

Thanks, Britease. Very humorous story with a lesson for all. Dan

cutest cock story I've ever read.

This story this time I keep Laura, keep Delia to. Chat the rest of the woman's group up, and continue to reassure Laura that I will always love her. Tell her I don't want things to change between us, or between my new friends. I'll always love you.

Oh and I love your stories.

Peac e out my brother

I think this story would be better served to the female readers here.

This was the first of this series that I read, and I think it's just about perfect! The conversation that starts it out is well crafted, and the rest of it simply flows. The only thing wrong with the writing is that you do it so much better than I do. Nice job!

Hans

Where the bullshit stops,nobody knows!

for it being you when the hero is a stud huh? Well done and of course I believe that he is you and the Delia is waiting for you right now.

Thanks for the story. I really like all but your cuckold stuff or maybe it's RAAC whatever.

Should write a Follow-up where Delia goes and tells all to Her Friends. Much to Laura's Horror.

If she wants to try a bigger cock, that's what dildos are for!

How in the hell can she know what kind of orgasms her friends have? Because they TOLD her, LOL! Besides, different people orgasm differently, if one isn't "screaming and thrashing about," doesn't mean her orgasm wasn't as good as someone who was!

Great finish! Five stars from me!

Good fun!

Gullible and stupid, good to be rid of her.

Fine story about the theories of relativity and reality.

I've always enjoyed the "we have to talk" stories by this author. 5 stars

well done its about time theirs a story about a man and not a fag bitch

Typical Britease fun, puts a smile on ones face.

What a welcome relief to finally read a decent story; they're very much in short supply these days, what with all the cuck & really poorly written tales littering LW of late. Congrats.

4 ****

................has not lost a step. Indeed, it may have gained a pace. Well done.

Thank you......

Silly indeed.

You kinda have to feel bad for Laura, 'cause dumb-as-hell chick who's been in a marriage for 15 years doesn't usually fare too well when said marriage dies, regardless how big their tits are or how long their legs looks.

The worst person of this tale, undoubtedly, is Anne - I seriously don't know why she went all of her way to destroyed her supposed best friend's marriage, but hey... I guess they will have more time together to find a way to cuckold her own husband.

Kinda of a bittersweet story, really - watching a couple break up over such silly things give me no joy whatsoever. Glad that Phillip bounce back so fast, though - he didn't deserve what happen to him, but he sure recovered quite beautifully.

Because sir you are a husband character developed by one of the stupidest people that has ever lived in the United Kingdom

I'd expect all live squids to be a bit damp, if not outright wet. Did he excrete slime, have tentacles, or leave trails of suction cup marks? If not, then he definitely was not a damp squid.

A squib is essentially a small explosives device. A damp squib is probably not going to explode when the igniter is....ignited. Squib can be used stand alone to express the diminutiveness of something, since it's not a proper explosive like a full stick of TNT. A damp squib can be used for something that doesn't live up to expectations. So its used right, it's just wrong. Squib.Squib.Squib.Squib. Not squid.

I rated this story one star. I guess I wasn't in a humorous mood, I'd probably rate it three since it's fine, minus the squid part, and well, it's not particularly offensive for fantasy. I typically dislike anything Britease writes, but this is comparatively plausible for pre-existing end-stage marriage cancer.

There's a bit more to say when it comes to culpability, but I am not going to bother this time.

and the past is now the present, TK U MLJ LV NV

Good little story. Women exaggerate too, don't they?

Enjoyable nonsense which did make me chuckle.

"A damp squid" is often used colloquially in conversation by the less well-educated. If this was in the narrative, then by all means criticise it, but in dialogue this was just further evidence of how thick Laura was.

I tell myself that no wife is that stupid, but then I'm sure there is someone out there who will prove me wrong. This story of betrayal put a smile on my face.

A TRUE moron. That laura's picture should be in a dictionary right next to the definition of a moron!

Loved it get so damn tired of stories with LARGE dicks

Taken enough group showers sports USMC etc

Guys talk also especially when young

Saw one in marine corps not erect matched the one in Sears catalogue

He took unmercifully teasing for a while from all of us sorry to say me included

Guy in your life exactly right in talking about size

Thanks for sharing

Well done, good story and a not unsurprising result! Too many spouses undervalue their partners 'attributes' on both sides of the sexual divide. Large cocks are not unheard of but they are not always a panacea to sexual satisfaction. Like large tits, shaved pussies and 'bubble-butts' they are often responsible for arousal but seldom stand alone as components of good sex. The grass is always greener..... but the cock,tits and pussies are NOT always better! As to your unnecessary regrets about the ending I loved it... Everybody knows where it goes from here... p.s give Delia my address!!

Loved it

Loved it, just loved it. Your short stories are such a hoot!

How does he not know his wife of nigh 15years is not a gullible mindless idiot? He has to be just as clueless as she is not to have figured that out long ago. This was difficult to read as you can't even grasp at how mindless she is. Not a good story. No one to actually root for as the wife clearly has a learning disability.

Gotta have a little humor on occasion to keep things easy. really good job.

Even a less than bright woman should never believe another woman about someone else's size.