All Comments on 'We Own a Legal Brothel! Ch. 01'

Great story. Keep it cumming

Definitely worth going on with

Great story. Episodes 2,3 ....as soon as possible please!!

Off to a rollicking start. Keep going, please. The characters are quite believeable, and the entire tale has just enough realism to make it a hot read. More! Soon!

title says it all, start with the next morning

Best story I have ever read.

If you and Chantal become popular enough, people will write you complaining about your grammar and language usage. I suggest you get an editor (LadyCibelle, my editor, is a top choice).

That said, I liked this story a lot. I know some women who went into legal prostitution after the breakups of their marriages, and they seem to have done well. The details of the story were "stranger than fiction" (hard to imagine the events happening in the order and sequence they did), but handled rather carefully and with a strong attempt at credibility.

My name is Captain Midnight, and I'm an author for this site. I post anonymously because I can't remember my password (I log in to my account automatically). If you want to converse some more, please respond to this comment and I'll see about talking to you, or I may drop you a line directly.

Best wishes!

If you and Chantal become popular enough, people will write you complaining about your grammar and language usage. I suggest you get an editor (LadyCibelle, my editor, is a top choice).

That said, I liked this story a lot. I know some women who went into legal prostitution after the breakups of their marriages, and they seem to have done well. The details of the story were "stranger than fiction" (hard to imagine the events happening in the order and sequence they did), but handled rather carefully and with a strong attempt at credibility.

My name is Captain Midnight, and I'm an author for this site. If you want to converse some more, please respond to this comment and I'll see about talking to you, or I may drop you a line directly.

Best wishes!

With the "We" in the title I rather expected Chantal to join him again on the sidelines and maybe marry him to get the "We".

But, apparently that won't happen. The Statement about her "descent" into more is ominous. She's a whore. Can she descend further without great pain?

I thought having a 2 foot cock jammed in her cunt would be pain enough.

Why are large cocks associated with blacks? I read somewhere, that white men are bigger. Average larger.

I will read the next chapters but when it gets to BDMS I quit. The tit slapping is more than I need.

With the "We" in the title I rather expected Chantal to join him again on the sidelines and maybe marry him to get the "We".

But, apparently that won't happen. The Statement about her "descent" into more is ominous. She's a whore. Can she descend further without great pain?

I thought having a 2 foot cock jammed in her cunt would be pain enough.

Why are large cocks associated with blacks? I read somewhere, that white men are bigger. Average larger.

I will read the next chapters but when it gets to BDMS I quit. The tit slapping is more than I need.

I love women's bodies. They're soft, smooth, and curvy and I wish them to stay soft and smooth.

I really enjoyed the story. thanks for posting it. Great job mate.

A well writen story with a good plot. I hope you post more soon.

I don't vote on stories, I just give comments. You really need to use an editor. Great plot, great character interaction, but you need an editor to take care of the grammar. Keep writing.

Nicely done author. If you keep the tone respectful you will continue a winner - absent that things could or will get grim for all.

An editor could be a good move as it will free you up in some regards without losing control.

please change the word "then" to 'than'

Not much more to say about this literary travesty!

Don't waste your effort on more. You just can't write.

This story was well-written, imaginative and highly erotic. Both my wife and I liked this story a lot. We both grew up out here in Nevada. It is always interesting to see how fascinated folks from England and Europe are with our culture. Especially, with the legal brothels in Nevada.

You put a lot of thought into the story, did good research and got the details right on how a brothel operates; we appreciated that. One thing most foreigners don´t know is how deeply brothels are entrenched in our culture; to us it is just another business. A lot of housewives, college girls and recently divorced women work in the trade, especially on the busy weekend nights.

When I first started dating my wife, we were both going to the University of Las Vegas, and I had the good sense not to ask her why she vanished most weekends! Once she graduated, she got a real job, we married and then had kids. However, she learned enough tricks of the trade to keep me a happy man!

Now she is a stay-at-home mom, but, does some occasional night work as an escort, when she needs a little excitement. Sloppy seconds don’t bother me at all. A lot of house payments in our home state of Nevada are made by wives working on their backs!

We will enjoy reading your next installments to this great story-line.

I can completely understand her feelings. Being able to experience her sexual adventures with out having an emotional attachment would be wonderful.

Your story was enjoyable and is the start of a wonderful series. Thank you for writing and sharing it. I understand that it is a lot of effort that authors put into these stories.

There are a few items of note, or changes that you could make which would make this into a much, much more enjoyable read. Here are my thoughts and they are just my humble opinion...

I hope that in other chapters, you will explore what the other prostitutes are doing and get the owner more involved in the fucking. If, in this chapter, you had included several "chimes" where a different girl was selected, it would have been more realistic. You didn't need to include the details of those other girls, but it is hard to believe that EVERY (or nearly every) customer that night chose Chantel.

I agree with previous comments that recommend getting an editor. A good editor is worth their weight in gold! (Check out the author forums to find a free volunteer editor.)I don't want to sound like your high school English teacher, but your story had many run-on sentences and other grammatical errors which detracted a lot from the story's readability. An editor would help you to catch and correct these errors.

Of particular note, is your use of "Than" and "Then." In what I'd guess to be about 181 occurrences, you used the correct word only once and I'm guessing that was by accident. Then (as in next) Vs. Than (as in rather than or instead of...) These are small but very important items. It was only the story line that kept me reading. Usually, the grammar alone would have made me just go read a different story.

Thanks again for sharing your creation.

The story is good and I enjoyed it. However, I do hate a story that has a lot of issues that would have been solved by being edited. These problems were spelling, grammar and conflicts of information.

Also, some of the STD stuff is wrong, and even if this is fantasy I hate things that give information that would be bad for people to assume is correct. She would not be safe just because she only ever had sex with her husband. If her husband slept with 1000 women then she has not slept with just him, but all of them too. Also, why bother with no fingers allowed and condoms for oral when she then lets him go down on her? Without dental dam she could just as easy pick up an STD passed on orally. Not to mention most STD's can't be seen visually, and certainly not by someone with no medical training except the very obvious cases of certain ones.

Super verhaal ben echt benieuwd naar het vervolg :)

Loved it