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End of Part I
- COMMENTS
Anonymousover 1 year agoThe vocabulary has been mentioned several times. Fancy words do not equate to good story telling. If they are a stumbling block for the reader and break the narrative flow then they do not aid the story. That's beside the fact that some of them weren't even used correctly.
IaOldTimerover 6 years agoWhy is it that when you stumble upon a writer with this skill set, they stop publishing?
honybipolaover 7 years agoI got hooked... and I just stumbled on this...you are one hell of a write...
MadBrownover 8 years agoSo far well written and your phraseology is interesting but don't try to tell me you haven't made ample use of your thesaurus. Geez, you kinda go overboard with your use of two dollar words.
Anonymousabout 10 years agoYour vocabulary is well beyond that of the average Literotica writer.
Anonymousover 12 years agoI'm sorry I didn't read your stories before. You are really good. Please keep them coming and thank you whoever you are u06la14b!
Anonymousover 12 years agoGood story. Liked it a lot! I think this is the longest one I've read here.
Anonymousover 12 years agoMan, this was good. Enjoyed every aspect especially the sister-brother stuff!
Anonymousover 12 years agoSexual and emotional tension, physical danger and suspense, excellent grammar, great character and plot development, awesome wordsmithing (hypnagogic, signum), it's all here. I'm eager to get into the remaining chapters. While I'm not a casual user of superlatives, you are one of the best writers on this site. Keep 'em coming!
Anonymousover 12 years agoIt's a nice change of pace to read a well-plotted story with a dash of good grammar thrown into the mix. The characters are nicely developed, and their physical and emotional connection is compelling. Well done.
SilvesterMover 12 years agoNice story. It seems I have 5 more chapters to read at this moment, but I can't complain :-)
Anonymousover 12 years agoAs shown by his writing
Great story so far keep this series up!
sabine_doucetteover 12 years agoYour writing is easily the best I've read here. Keep the good work coming!
Anonymousover 12 years agoI love how this story is moving along, the flashbacks can be a tad bit confusing but overall, the language is flowing nicely and is kept up-beat...
Well done ;)
petecoover 12 years agoI read almost 3 pages until it got dumb sorry it's just to long and through in the dumb and it's just not going to happen
Anonymousover 12 years agoSame story/different title?
This story was placed in the new category several days ago and you posted part two of it also.
