All Comments on 'Yo-yo Chronicles Ch. 02-2 Ending'

You didn't finish the damn story. Pretty good so far though.

Can't wait till the Next chpter???

Yeah I liked it. Only a person who has been totally betrayed can understand the retribution and not be appalled. Of course it's a little severe, maybe even over the top. But that's how this sequel is supposed to be. It's just a shame you can't write a sequel to my life.

Okay now that the preliminaries are over, bring on the maggots in charge. That should be fun. Oh yeah.

Wrong category. Should't be here. No stars.

I Loved it the Dominatrix B!tch's are getting the tables Turned. Can't wait to see How Joanna takes it considering how the men hate her. and the women who are being debased are having time to think back and Realise what they have given up and Lost.

I personally feel that the reality you use to finish off stories sets you apart from most other writers. You were correct this one is really out there and could have easily been written by any other author on the site. Sorry FTDS but in my humble opinion this is far from your best effort

I mean Holy Crap.

I waited for part 2 now I have to wait for tier 5?

I hate to wait but I will be waiting for the next installment.

The writing was, as usual, very good but I have enough knowledge of what really happens with this kind of scenario to realize what this does to the guards as well as the prisoners.

Google "Stanford Prison Experiment" to get an idea.

As such the story revolves around non consent and horror themes and just like the originals that these continue, really ought to be in one of those categories.

Becoming a monster to pay back a monster is not justice. Very well done but very sad. Could I see these men doing this? Absolutely. If followed through to the honest, non-fantasy and inevitable conclusion however, they would become the monsters they hate. Look at the Middle East or the Balkans. The final result is that everyone suffers and lives in hell.

... why some tales need a multi-category status.

Over the top, well written.

I wish you'd live up to your user name and finish the damn story.All the stupid sex scenes could easily be left out and the whole story would move along better.Just my humble opinion.

Thus story is all about justice, retribution and regaining dignity. At the expense of others? Absolutely! Real life. Not on your life. Fiction is not always about a made up set if characters and circumstances that just hasn't happened yet, sometimes it's simply a fantasy that has no basis in reality. Is if possible? Yes, but certainly improbable. I think that this us dragging on too long because of the drawn out sex scenes. I think you are overdoing if there. Some of it is to show us the amount of degradation that happens, however, we get it. Spelling but out once isn't any different a dozen times. Some if it is to show the relationship bring built between Stu and the slaves. You can do that without the gratuitous scenes as well. Thus is LW not BDSM. Too much is too much regardless.

This is just too much. Consider me bailing at this point.

I thought you were a very good talented writer, but this is to much. I will not read the rest of this story. I realize it is fiction, but it is crap.

we read about a fella name of Friedrich Nietzche. I remember one of the things he said, "He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. And when you gaze long into an abyss the abyss also gazes into you."

This story isn't about punishing some bitches, this is about the fight for Stu's soul.

I guess I must fall into the minority, I have never been able to get it up more than 4 times in a day and they're able to go all day and into the night of ceaseless fucking and sucking. I'm trying to like this second part but it's just crazy now, they are falling into the void as one commenter stated. I'll try to read the rest but no guarantees. Mukden.

As others have already pointed out: the men are on the way to become the monsters their cheating wifes where - and the wifes are becoming the victims.This doesn't really help - and if you consider the hate growing deep inside those "bitches", you might have to write another story about their revenge on the husbands. In short: if these "slaves" survive they would probably not leave their agony forgotten and forgiven. Who could?

I agree with many other commenters that you should have left out many of the ugly details since this is not the BDSM-category but LW. If I and many others would crave for such ugly scenes we would go there.

But despite this criticism: thanks for (hopefully soon) finishing the unpleasant original story and for your excellent writing. From me: 4*

I didn't read the garbage of course but went to comments as most of us do and saw the majoriety opinion that this is crap and fetish what is ruining the LW category. We constantly fight with administration to give Loving Wives it's proper meaning and remove all wimp fetish cuckold shit to somewhere else but they want listen. But we will fight them to the death.

author you really spent time writing this crap?

Occasionally, some random member of the Anonymous clan gets it right. It's pretty obvious that you pulled this one out of the same dark recesses of your soul that enabled you to write your sequel to "Danielle's Revenge." The only thing that saved that story was your protagonist's admission, there at the end of the story, that his revenge had broken both Danielle and him.

I will be interested in seeing what you do with this one.

While normally I'm your biggest fan...and I really don't have much of a problem with offing someone evil....this drags on and on and on with the bdsm thing....ew..yuck. Just shoot em and get it over with. I hate bdsm dom types...don't want them to breath my air...and your going down that rabbit hole big time here.

The crimes the people commited add up to hours...your revenge is adding up to months...just not right...too long too much.

Better dead then a slave...

Yep. Too much? Not sure. I found myself skimming over the sex/slave training scenes to get to the next stages of planning to bring down the whole organization.

The original Yo-Yo tales were way over the top. So are these. Remember, people. This is FICTION. As in NOT REAL. Just enjoy the twisted ride. LOL

5 Stars, FTDS. Keep 'em coming.

Wow. I thnk FTDS's writing is interesting and this series is addictive. Can't imagine what he has store for the "real" perps. The wives seem genuinely repentant and seem to get it. I didn't rate 02-1 but this one is five stars. Don't know whether that will hold for part 3 though.

I have read some "over the top" stories, where every word and every action are carefully crafted by the author for the ENJOYMENT of his/her audience and, thus, the stories were great, because almost every word and every line delivered by the characters --- as well as every events that happened in the stories ---- were carefully *choreographed* (again, by the author).

True, different people enjoy different things.

Ted Bundy, et al, for example, enjoy raping women and then GENTLY, as with loving surgical intentions, inserting a spike into their forehead or vagina, afterward. I am sure that very enjoyable, too, FOR SOME PEOPLE. Unfortunately, that kind of *enjoyment* is, well, not what we "more failing people" here are talking about. That's only for the "really special kind of people" like Bundy and others who live more or less parallel realities to ours but who, nevertheless make us their victims and do so HAVING ABSOLUTELY NO VINDICTIVENESS or hate for us; we are simply animals randomly picked for slaughtered for meat...

In addition, if a story IS TOLD from a psychopath's point of view, then, I have no problem with it, either, if I choose to read it. A good, clever, and truly evil psychopath would be able to explain, in minute details, how he tortures, cuts, burns, rapes, and/or deals away with his victims.

Despite the confusion, REVENGE STORIES are not from the perspectives of psychopaths; they are from the perspective of decently sane people who are very, very angry.

There is very clear LINE separating EXTREME ANGER and the consequences (say, revenge) when it is taken out on others around you (on those who you say have angered or wronged you. etc), on the one hand, from PSYCHOPATHY and its effects on society, on the other....

Equating the two DON'T ALWAYS WORK WELL. Not in terms of story-telling, not in terms of linguistic dialogues, not in terms of character believability, and not in terms of other variables like ENJOYMENT by the average readers who are not outliers (like psychopaths)....

This story is one of those.

When you spend a vast amount of your story-development preparing to capture and torture the victims (as revenge), you can not, THEN, say it's all for comedic or farcical effect, either. Not for the audience and not for those torturing "the bad guys (women, in this case)."

That's the problem with this story...

BTB is one thing, this is something else! This has crossed over to pure sadism. Not sexy, and way beyond revenge. This is the stuff serial killers are made of...creepy, really creepy.

This story is in Loving Wives. Maybe it should be in another category.

This is the worst sadistic writing I've ever come across, and it. Continues no less. More pain and rape for some evil Women and some who didn't realize what they had done.ftds hasn't even gotten to the leader of this evil . How many broken bodies to come.this is so sad a tale.

FTDS - this is dark [agreed], but an awesome approach to those fucked up manipulative sluts. "5"

Should be in BDSM not loving wives

I gave it a five. Hey it's fiction people, read it in that mind set. I could see a tamed version of Yo-Yo and the subsequent revenge on the big screen. Very original story.

Gotta agree this belongs in another catagory but Lit doesn't have a "Disgusting Sewage" section. The really scary thing is the tiny-dicked misogynists whacking away on their miniscule pee-pees while going on about how great this is.

Totaly sick. Disgusting even.

Very hard to read. A good example of why revenge is a bad idea.

This is only a story story? Right? ;} bill.....

I know this is supposed to be enjoyed as fictional but are the guys letting the females use birth control? Or their tubes would have to be tied or some other medical reason to prevent pregnancy? I know they aren't using condoms so its a possibility for at least one of them to get pregnant.

Since Stu wants to now have kids and Ellie mentioned she was going to stop using pills its odd that none of the guys mentioned that the women could possibly get pregnant with all the sex they had.

Yes the wives were the ones who shouted balloon setting up their husbands. Yes they should suffer consequences for their actions. Were any of the husbands placed in a permanent torture chamber and subjected to repeated rape and mental and physical abuse? no. Were the wives the ones running the moving torture chamber? no. It is time for the wives to be returned, chastened and rueful to what is left of their lives.

Is the floating abuse party still going on? yes Have any of the people running the party been punished? no. Have those who lied to the wives and misrepresented the severity of the actions on stage been even neutralized? no. Have the two men who week after week sodomize and brutalize the hapless "good actor" suffered any consequences? no.

It is time the husbands, to whom their singular event occurred, direct their rage at the serial rapists and exact some meaningful retribution from the perpetrators. This should be done for themselves and all of the other men on whom this torture and humiliation was inflicted. It should be done to take down the ongoing torture chamber and direct the rage at the source of the wrongs.

The story is a bit wild. I have it a 5*

...it has been 2 weeks now and I am very curiously looking for the next part.

It is scary, though, how it almost seems right?

FINISH THE DAMN STORY

where is the next part?

That says it all. For the love of cliff hangers, finish. Please.

FTDS!!!!!!

Great revenge story,hate to see how cuc he is too his own wife when she betrayed him twice though.

I mean he barely healed up and she was going to do it to him again.

Now hopefully the ones in charge ,I really need to see some of those broken.

Take a look there're more that one slut in this story

Payback - Ten Fold

byTurned©

I doubt if I could have been as tough on them as these men are. However, if I was one of those that were treated like they were I am sure that I would be as tough as these men are. Great story.

When you have a favorite whip...

Extreme betrayal calls for extreme reprisal. FTDS does.not disappoint here.

I only wish tmit was more drawn out. The mind break, submission, training, slowed down and more elaborate. Delicious story, nonetheless.

Would execution be more just??

We are not animals

Breaking someone puts us below that level

Animals establish pecking order or kill

BUT in story you say broke BUT written as not totally broken

So I keep reading

Any SOB thinks it ok to totally break someone I will more happily convince them of their error than VC NVA shooting at me in Nam

I know this is all fiction. Even then I’m concerned for the thinking of the men that wrote it. That’s said, let’s all make sure nobody thinks this kind of thing is justified.

How come none of the women got pregnant?.

The FTDS were two seriously fucked up individuals. This also shows why forgiveness is so important. There is a very old proverb, when seeking revenge be sure to dig two graves. By definition of the story line, the wives were caught up in the moment, fantasy, these men deliberately planned and carried out a plan of personal destruction which rivaled anything that the Hitler, or Stalin did. Believe me, the wives will see the kingdom before these men will.

So many whiners and wimps in the comments section. My apologies to #jtwheels#; I am also a vet and COMPLETELY disagree with you. Things I saw and did, and continue to do and see, hardened me. (Jungle back then, other places, and later deserts. (Yeah! I'm now that old.)).

1. This is only fiction (mental masturbation). 2. It is well-thought-out, and well-written. 3. Within the confines of this fictional world, these women CONSPIRED, and accomplished truly horrendous acts. Think of the organization they built to power their evil. Think of the bottom-feeding men they recruited to help them. The consequences to the husbands are lasting, and on-going. Not only humilation from the acts themselves, also blackmail videos, knowing those videos have been shared, threats of bankruptcy, etc. The ficttional wives are being dealt with quite properly by their fictional husbands in that fictional world.

I would like to see the "men" that helped those women punished, also.

In the end, though, its only words on a page. If it's too strong for you, read something else. I hear this site has many reconciliation and cuckold stories.

Brilliant stuff

5/5