by mspat
hey mspat, it's been awhile, but i am very plsd to see a story that seems to be as good as sabella and malcom, from you, but pls, pls, pls don't forget about them as well, i will be looking for your updates continuously as i seem to be drawn to your characters in both stories
I love a good and happy ending,
Nice story cant wait to see where this goes. also was wondering if Sabella & Malcolm was going to get
anymore attn. from you?
Great and interesting start. Might just be a great story. I promise to follow it if you upload the new chapters very very often.
i like it already. Zachary seems very kind hearted. and Ciara and Emilee are sure to be adorable characters as well. i agree with everyone else. please dont let us wait so long.
Mspat Another good story to look forward to reading. Mspat all of your stories wonderful. Don't wait to long to update this story. But could you please finish your stories.
You are off to a great start, hope to see next chapter very soon
Oh I just loved the way this story started. please continue. I didnt want it to end. Look forward to reading more.
...the story. It's off to a good start, and I'd like to see where to take it.
I'm loving where this is going. I can't wait for the next chapter.
Awesome start, great builder so far. Seems to be moving pretty fast, but i don't know how long your going to make the series like you did with Sabella and Malcolm. Hope his buddies are assholes and f*ck this up. But i figure from reading the previous series there are more people to be introduced, and his buddies will be like Malcolm's farm hands. Hope to see more soon!
I love the characters already, especially Emilee. She sounds so adorable. Can't wait for more :)
**LilMami**
Why did I almost cry at the end?!?!....this is too sweet....OMG! PLEASE CONTINUE!...
British and U.S. - ??? I liked the story, but get it checked before you submit - your heroine changed her name for a brief period.
A most interesting start to what I hope is a wonderful story. Great job on creating likeable characters and leave us wanting more.
I loved the story but what about the other story! I am seriously waiting here!
Cute story beginning but it feels like you cheated by not labelling this story as Ch 1. I assumed it was a complete story in itself.
I think for the one wondering about the "Inter racial" tab - Anglo Englishman and African American -- Think that qualifies or it does in my world. Can wait for more and looking forward to following BOTH stories.
Hey Mspat I'm just loving your new story please update it soon I always love all your stories keep up the great writing and looking forward to your next update too.
Thanks,
IP
Hi Mspat,
Glad to see a new story. I'm loving i so far. Please update again very soon.
Looking forward to chapter 2 (and others?). Can't wait until he gets his Ciara and Emily home to collect his inheritance. Fuck those people trying to control him, looking forward to their reactions.
The easy flow the author has used makes me leery of a "lived happily everafter" ending. Giving a reader a reasonable suspision of "something else coming" is the sign of an author that keeps my attention. I'm waiting........
Ms Pat
Really liking this new one. I like the ease of interation between the characters. Like everyone else hoping to read more soon.
Ciara's sister was so mean to her...her niece is in a wheel chair and she wouldn't allow her sister to stay with her that seems so unfair. I hope that the marriage between Ciara and Zak works out ok. Thanks
Your story is well thought-out. It makes you want to know more about the characters other when they are going to have sex. There appears to be so many layers to them and I can't way to see what comes next.
Hey cool story but you need to have it edited for punctuation and some missing words, otherwise cool story.
this story has agreat plot. the only problem is your transitions to other scenes are not so great. the whole story's flow needs to be better, so word choice will help with that. there was one point when you changed ciara's name to arlene. this tells me you haven't proof read your work very well. also your grammar mistakes tells me this too. please don't take my words to heart, i just want to help to make this good story better, even profesionals go through this too. so work hard and don't give up!!!!!
I like the story so far. I can only imagine what is going to happen when they get to London. I am sure that Zach mother and Abigail are going to be furious that Zach married someone else with a child. Thanks
I love the setup for this story it seems like its going to be really cute.
5 stars *****
I love the beginning of this beautiful story so far. I can't wait to finish it.
I love it Ciara and Emilee's story is heartbreaking and it makes the story truely touching. I can't wait to hear more!
I noticed when I started reading you forgot the name of your main female character. I see that happen a lot with some of the stories here. You called "Ciara" "Arleen", that threw me off. But the story so far is really interesting.
Love kidz and any story with a kid in it makes it special to me. I look forward to reading this story as your work has wonderful qualities that touch the heartstrings.
you kinda had the names wrong and repeated the same thing like..3 times but in a different way about he passport dont know if u meant to but its confusing
Fuck, you need an editor! Words missing and comma's where they don't belong, that's just a few errors!
I've never understood people's need to be rude to the writers on here. Most people on here are amateur writers and as such deserve credit for even writing. If you don't like the story or the grammar/spelling stop reading and move on to another story. It's not like you had to pay for what you've read!
This is a very good build-up for the rest of the story. I totally agree with "Anonymous" on 01/18/2014 and "Cantbuymy". There are some seriously ignorant and rude people leaving comments on this site. But, you can't change them, so ignore them. If they can do better (for FREE)... just do you and your readers will be fine.
I so happy you continued the story we've only had to wait three years . Keep writing don't listing to negative comments . At least you giving it a go. I like this story can't wait to see what happens next thanks orchid man
...an interesting start and it's an interesting premise. I don't think I've heard or read of someone marrying someone else to spurn an arranged marriage in this vein. I'm interested to see how it progresses.
I am wondering who Arlene is other than that it's a cute start to a good story. What a piece of crap her sister is going to regret not helping her.