by Cynthia W.
Awesome, but…….every damn plane will have me tearing up thinking of Grace!
Exceptionally well written, and the heart rang through it all.
Be proud of your story!
This is beautifully written. My younger son had a heart defect, and one operation fixed the issue. One of the best stories on the site. Certainly one of the best in the romance category.
Put a child with disabilities in a love story, that is as well written as this. gets the tears flowing everytime.5 stars
Actually I thought it needed a final page for conclusing. But I'm picky so I won't rate it as it is better than 4 :-)
Incredible work of art! Yeah, I cried when Grace died. Not going to lie.
That's the mark of an exceptional author. I hope you will write more.
Brilliant story, and definitely a 5 star story imho, I did find a few odd phrases/word choices though, e.g. “turned on combustion” instead of “started engine”, I don’t know if English is your first language or not, but if it isn’t, you deserve a lot more credit than the current 4.88 for writing at such a high quality in what may be a second language.
Many thanks for writing and posting, cheers Ppfzz.
This old man still has tears in his eyes. I was thinking that Grace would get a last second donor BUT it would be Peter's && Pauline's baby I am glad it did not end that way. A story book ending would be if they had married and had their own child. Great story!
As stated by others, great story.
(Grace looked down on her father and Miss Claire and smiled knowing he found love and wouldn't be alone. It was time for her to go.)
This story being on this website does it a disservice IMO. This story is beyond good, I'm a grown man sitting here crying over a little girl dying in a story. This story moved me and it's so beautiful and tragic. I was so hoping for the happy ending where Grace got a last second doner and everything worked out for everyone. This was an amazing story that happened to include a sex scene far more than it was an erotic story. Thank you for this wonderful story that deserves so much more than to be on an erotic story website.
Wow, not often a story on here makes me cry but this one really got to me. I hope you are still writing, you have such talent. 5*
lost a niece at 5 1/2 years old. she had brain cancer didn't have a name for it then but now it's 15 letters long. this story about Grace dug some memories.
I can't see the screen. It's all blurry. NO I'M NOT FREAKING CRYING!! I got something in my eye. Both of them. Devastating. Brilliant. You left out Clair saying "You know she'll never leave you. She's still here" putting her hand over his heart "she asked me to tell you that she wasn't going to leave you."
I haven't cried over many stories here. But take my tears. It was a beautiful story.
WTF…NO No No how could you. Why turn this beautiful story into a fucking Shakespearean tragedy. You had me in tears the whole last chapter….I was hoping against hope Grace would get a heart at the last moment and that Clair would be her new mum. I hate you. still I gave you ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Can't describe the feeling after reading the story. From start to finish I just can't stop reading it. Definitely a 5 star ✨🌟✨🌟✨🌟✨🌟✨🌟 ratings. Thank you very much for your story.
Ali Singapore
The degree of differentiation of forms, shapes, colours and shades of love, sympathy and affection in a- well, yes, sort of short story- is astonishing. The array of feelings, emotions , sentiments and character traits is also above average. The language is unpretentious. The world is not painted in black and white, like in "women are all noble creatures and man are pigs". You won't find blatantly displayed axioms of political correctness, with the exception of the statement that all children, regardless of their talents and abilities, deserve the best from their parents and from the society as a whole, to which I wholeheartedly agree.
In other words, there is next to no content that could rub against anybody's grain and there is next to non fancy- shmancy stuff, hyped today and shunned or forgotten tomorrow. Thus It impacts and moves readers now and will continue to to so in the future.
In other words: a tear jerker of the better kind.
every time i read about Grace there are showers in the house. between my late wife we lost 5 . the pain was still great even though they were micarries.
Beautiful sad story and semi happy ending. guessing the end brought a few tears but the coming together of two people with real love was beautiful also, Haven't heard from the author since '19 hope she is happy and well in her new country.
knew where this was going but read it all. lost a niece at 5&1/2 yrs old with gbh they didnt have a name back then. at 77 + yrs old brought rain in the house.
Told with grace, about Grace.
To the haters, grow up. Not everything is a Hallmark movie, life has lots of pain. Broaden your horizons, read some Greek tragedies. Tragedy makes you feel in a way a happy ending won't.
I have read many stories of love and death in my 60+ years but this one had me in tears and yet it was almost like Grace was watching over them. You have a great talent thank you for sharing with us.
Letting Grace die killed the story.
What happened after lost any meaning.
Taussigs has a low mortality rate these days. Having Grace live was more than realistic. You ought to have put a fricken warning.
I hated the fact you let Grace die, plus you left the ending unfinished.
why did you have to kill her...
ugh thats such a love/hate relationship writers killing innocent little kids... so full of love and all...
but thats what makes the story great i guess.....I still dont like it and at the same time love it...
Totally sappy and yet a great story that reaches out and grabs you.
What a tear jerker. Just love the story and the characters were quite well written.
Bryan said, I don't think you have any children to Claire then added I hope you don't.
That was a mean spirited thing to say and certainly out of character for him. She was after all 27 years old not 17 or there abouts. I've mistaken sugar for salt but cinnamon for coriander!?
Sad. But lovely. I love the way you wrote them falling in love.
In this story when the characters went christmas shopping they talked about shopping for themselves. It struck me as strange. I can understand treating a sick child to a toy shopping spree when it is not known which day is her last, but do adults go shopping for themselves because it's christmas? Is that a regular thing in the US? I'm from Finland and here when we do christmas shopping we shop for christmas foods, christmas decorations and the gifts we intend to give to others. Is it a part of the american christmas culture or shopping culture to also go shopping stuff for oneself in the weeks leading up to christmas?
I'm only at the part where she's done looking at the house and is being driven to meet Bryan by her sister in law. I'm really excited by this story. It's very comforting, very soothing. I'm curled up on the couch, christmas tree lights shining gently from the corner of the room, our dogs asleep close by. I'm reading this and waiting for my hubby to come home from work. I feel happy and warm. It's such a balm for the soul, reading a sweet romance story like this. Thank you, writer. Thank you for making it possible for me to spend time relaxing with this story.
Had to be hard, as a writer, to let Grace die rather than reach for the happy ending. You made it work. Good job.
Boy, what a story. Well written and kept me engrossed until the end. I saw the ending coming But I was hoping that you would save Gracie at the end and that would be the twist. Thank you for a beautiful...but very sad story.
The only thing that bothered me was Claire's continual reverting to her breakup. Other than that this is a great story and a real page turner. I also cried.
Never have I cried so much, it was really a great story, I hope you keep writing.
""Daddy thinks I'm going to leave him," she said softly, as if sharing a secret with her. "Will you tell him that I'll never leave him?"
Well, that as a kick in the feels.
Thanks for taking us on this emotional rollercoaster.
Stars, I'm crying like a child. This was truly beautiful. You have a gift that is rare and entrancing. In a few sentences you had me involved in the story and truly caring for each and every character. The way you portrayed everyone was real and the reactions were raw and emotional. I rarely cry and this got to me so intensely. It's so hard to overcome loss especially the loss of a child. No parent should ever have to outlive their child. Ever. The build up of Bryan and Claire's relationship made sense and was paced so that it never felt too soon or too slow. It was all very natural. Thank you. I really do hope you endeavor to pursue writing such poignant stories and share this talent with more of the world.
I had to stop reading several times to calm down, plus the salt in my tears was too much to handle. As a dad who has spent too many nights sitting beside my eldest daughter's hospital bed in or out of the ICU, watching her heart rate vary from 160 up as high as 220 (during asthma attacks), this really hits close to home. I am blessed because my daughter survived and rarely suffers from serious asthma now at age 25. Personally, had my daughter died I would have been shocked and offended if someone I knew wanted to name another baby by her name. I would never have been comfortable with that, I would have felt that her identity and her memory was being taken, or disrespected. On the other hand, if it was a generation later, it would feel wonderful - for instance if my youngest daughter named her child with her name.
Are you from the British Isles, or maybe Europe? I noticed plenty of word usage and idioms that I have only heard from my British friends and colleagues. No need to hide it or avoid it, because it's part of your literary voice and style. And there's no need to set your stories in the US just to please your audience!
I have a strong impression you have faced trauma and/or despair in your life. You portray these feelings very intensely, and they seem so true-to-life that I can't believe they aren't based in experience. And yet, your story is so uplifting!
God it fucking made me cry.Damn it was one of the greatest stories I have ever read here. Kuddos man keep it up.
This story is tender, loving and yet sad. You amazingly portray the power of Grace's love on those around her. Claire and Bryan are written so well. Their relationship is so much more than many stories. They take the time to get to know each other while falling in love. Grace's love and outlook on life gave hope to those around her. She accomplished more in her short life than most people in a lifetime. Excellent!
Five star story with good characters. You wrote well enough for a reader to care about you characters. The sister-in-law provided a perfect touch- enough of a comedic relief to keep it from being too dark, and a reminder that life continues. Her giving birth after Grace' death added a thematic undercurrent much like that in the song "Lightning Crashes" by the band Live.
A minor nit to pick as a medical type- Grace's condition is actually quite treatable- Kawahima procedure and others have been found to result in 5-year survival rates in the vicinity of 90%. That is quite a bit better than a lot of cancers. Just a minor detail no one except a pro would notice, though.
Great story but holy hell do I look a mess on this bus!! X
One of the best stories I've read. The strength of a child is miraculous. Known many that have left this world too early. You've captured the spirit of these brave little people. Well done.... 10
How could you do this. It was devastating. I'm not crying. It's just really hot and my eyes are sweating.
I loved reading this wonderful piece. I had to hold back tears....very emotional.
It was a very story that one could relate to and I felt connected.
Thank you ...to a gifted writer.
Indra
I cannot honestly comment on your story. It was too long to justify my reading it. KISS, Keep It Short Sister
omg! i am still crying and sobbing thinking about the pain they faced! i would feel so happy if grace had heart donor and she gets fine because she is the one who helped claire from getting out of her misery! u just can believe i've been crying since she was hospitalised and got serious! i have shut the lappy doom twice to make a break out of tears! soooo heart touching i can't just explain my feeling! awesome moral story!
So of course I'm going to criticize. But before I do let me say, at no time was it hard to give you 5 stars. This story was brilliant! Perfectly executed and masterfully crafted. Did I cry as so many others did? No. I did not. But only because I am a lying bastard.
I know I am posting this two years after the fact so please forgive me if you've already addressed this. I did spot a few type O's and some juxtaposed words and there were a couple of instances that stood out to me as odd.
When Pauline had the cramps suddenly it read, to me anyway, as if they both already knew she was pregnant. I didn't think much of it. I just assumed you had missed mentioning it before. Then later when her pregnancy was a surprise it took me back a bit.
That night, when Pauline came home there were several things that stuck out as odd. It read as if Claire, after downing over a half a bottle of JD let her in found out she was pregnant and then her brother came in. Drunk Claire, who just drunk dialed her ex, decided to take Pauline's car and drive away. I say Pauline's because I got the impression Claire didn't have a car. Then Bryan shows up and offers to drive her home. But he doesn't have a car? How did he know she did?
So, I do agree you should grab a trusted someone to act as a reader. Preferably someone who can actually sit in the room with you. Some one you respect. That being said, I didn't see ANYTHING that stole from the beauty of this story. If I had paid money for it, I -still- would be elated and recommending it to people.
I am looking forward to reading the rest of your work.
Thank you for this magnificent story.
I started crying when grace got hospitalized. Heck i'm still crying. I loved this story
Nice passionate and I would suggest write more. It was heart felt. I could not stop reading till I finished. Great writing.
There is a fierce and passionate protectiveness in the heart of all good men.
Once its targets were marauders, beasts, and other physical threats to the clan.
Nowadays a common thing that causes it to well up is insult or affront to his wife.
You captured its essence perfectly on pg 9 when Bryan defended her ambition level.
I could feel his ire rising as he sprung to here defense. Well played LoneGirl !!!
Wonderful, beautiful, heartbreaking, uplifting...simply amazing!
This story has me at a loss for words. Your story-telling was spot on, letting us fall in love with Grace, Claire and Bryan. The touching reality that not everything goes in life as we have planned. My wife and I have lost a daughter, I totally understood the numbness, walking only by putting one foot in front of the other, the tears, the gut-wrenching can't eat anything feeling. This story brought me to tears, many times. Life does go on, we never forget, bursting into tears even after many years. We lean on each other. I was so glad you brought Claire and Bryan back together to continue their relationship, he needed the love Claire had for him to help him thru.
Well written, thank you for this story.
I have read many excellent stories on this site. This story doesn't even get close to "excellent." You are so far above excellent that I don't even know what to call it.
You nailed this one. Yes, it was a long story but it needed all of it. Your use of "off the car" and a few others like it were a very nice touch. There are many ways of saying the same thing depending on what country you learn in.
The emotions of love and pain were handled in a very loving way. Even the grieving reactions were spot on. This story should never have a sequel. You started with Grace and ended with Grace. Very well done.
I can't imagine that any author here or elsewhere could ever write such a good story. One thing I wondered about half way through was how many shares you own of the tissue companies. My family sends its love to you and yours for taking the time to write such a lovely story.
Thanks for posting. The only complaint I have is that you should have warned us early on that we'd need some tissues. Worthy of at least ten stars!
Ive read this a number of times, always leaves my face a little wet and eyes watery. wish I could score this 10*
Thanks for sharing
I'm lost for words, honestly this was a story I couldn't stop reading. And as said in another comment, I wish there was more, more moving forwards in the story and more in the middle. Now, with the story concluded I only wish there was more Grace, as you had me in happy tears at one point, and plenty of sad tears later on. Its been quite awhile since I've cried this much, and never have I had this much emotion from a story.
As a writer you've successfully made me feel for the characters, something I struggle to achieve on my own writing. I'm no genius though, but you are. I'll have to check to see what else you've written as well, in case I find another gem like this.
Thank you for the wonderful read.
~J
I loved this story, you did an excellent job crafting a detailed beautiful tale. I just wish it carried on for just a bit longer. But that is what the readers imagination is for.
I'll say this: If you don't get a tear or two in your eye while reading this story, you are not freakin' human. One of the best I've read in a while and thank you LoneGirl for it.
Everyone should give this story 5 stars. I certainly did.
Your story is magnificent. I am a kidney transplant recipient of over 33 years and this story hit very close to home. Just a few months ago my wife and I attended a funeral of a 10 year old boy who died while waiting on the transplant list. The pain and emotions you brought forward were so realistic and authentic. It brought me to tears more than once. If I could give you more than 5 stars, I would. Excellent read!
these kinds of stories allways brings me back to feeling completly despretate to whanting to burn the world down i proberly should not have read it but it was such a great story
I'm guessing it's a true story or at least true for a lot of parents. There a lot of Claire's in the world, but hard to find sometimes. There are even less Bryans around, I am one but no one ever noticed. Good friend zone is all I get. That's ok. I loved this story and I love LoneGirl too.
I have never read such a beautiful , touching, real-life story in my whole life... God, I almost cried.... You ought to publish this.... Hats off to the author..... Keep going
The moment Claire decided to name her niece as Grace. I knew that I'm going to cry. Such a beautiful story. Thank you for writing.
Poignant...touching...awesome...a favorite!
After reading this amazing story I have used two boxes.
Thank you.........
You made a 50 plus year old former drill Sargent cry. 5 stars.
A great story. Sad for the loss of Grace, but a true and endearing romance.
This happens to be one of my favorite stories, if I can remove the dust from this room, which is causing a serious allergy in my eyes ...
5 * for you.
I apologize for my English (yet), is not my native language.
An absolute treat to read. Will be checking out your other stories.
This was a fabulous story. One of the best I've ever read. Thank you
All your stories are about broken people, and no one portrays pain and anguish the way you do. I sense a broken heart behind those words, because pain is sometimes more inspiring than happiness. Like the commenter before me said, I think you're indeed a beautiful human being. Looking forward to more from you.
Lone Girl,
There is some sadness in your writing; people don't write like you do who have not been there. But it's your life experiences brought to life in this and other stories that give your writing impact, compassion.
The little girl in your story is aptly named; she brings love to all she touches, at least until she passes, and even then her memory does the same.
I would like to remind you of what the word "grace" means. Biblical terminology in Hebrew (Old Testament) and Greek (New Testament) connotes unmerited favor. In other words, love, acceptance, affirmation, forgiveness, etc., all without being earned. It is THE theme of Christianity and Judaism. One of my own daughters is named "Graziella", or gracious-one. And she is.
I think your little grace would have forgiven those that had done her wrong or betrayed her. I hope you, Lone Girl, will be able to do the same in your real/personal life. Not forgiving someone, no matter how awful they have been to you, is like living in a prison, and I don't want that for you --- your writing speaks of a beautiful, loving human being behind your words.
Merry Christmas from the other side of the pond.
Your friend and fan,
Christopher
Just amazing!! I was bawling by that last chapter, and it ended beautifully.
Thank you for this
What a wonderful story. I fell in love with that little angel. And I hope Grace is resting in peace and her family finds closure..
Like a few others I saw the end coming and I cried. Such a sad a beautifully woven story and definitely 5 stars. I wish it wouldn't have had to end that way for Bryan but I saw it coming. Terrific story.
Moving.
I've been through that, the surgery, the hope, the funeral.
Though I didn't get the girl !
Very very well written.
Now I'm going to play Sarah Mclachlan 'full of grace' that's been going through my head while reading this.
And get another box of tissues.
You write wonderful stories. Yes I really choked up reading this one. Wish I could give it more than 5 stars. Thank you.
This is one of the most tender, caring, loving stories I have read in a long time. We should all take our lead from Grace's positive attitude towards life, despite all of the physical limitations with which she dealt. Every day is not perfect, but it can be much closer to that if we focus on the positive things in our lives.
Also, this story gives new meaning to the concept of saying Grace before meals. We should ensure that we really mean it!
Knew what was coming and still... tears. Well written. Realistic reactions from all. Of course father consumed with grief for a couple weeks. Any other reaction for a person who loved his daughter like that was not going to seem real. Bravo bravo. Family interaction superb. Well done. I am rambling and going to wash my tears away now. Thanks for 5* story.