by Daniellekitten
Nice revision. :) Can't wait until the bad guy shows up. Mirage seems in no mood to take prisoners.
It is a good start. I am glad to finally get to see how Mirage was cursed.
i need to know who and what mirage was back in Asap. I mean all the chapters but I forget who she was when I reading about Tambor Rylan. OOOHH BTW great story I am loving this one.
This is SO much more engaging that having a million different stories in one chapter. I'm so glad you're doing this. Thanks for writing.
Some of us commented on how your previous ASP story got a bit confusing with so many couples and had asked you to focus on one at a time and yet you flat out defended your stance to write it as it was. Oh well, whoever this person is who you respect so much, kudos to that person. This rewrite is WAY better than the previous ASP story that was getting convoluted with so many side stories. I'd like to thank the person that finally convinced you to focus on one couple/story at a time.
Great writing! I'm so glad to see this being written! I love your ASP stories. They are some of your best. And the focus is wonderful!
lots of love to you,
Dianne
I really liked the first chapter of this story. It is a great introduction to the characters. The background on Mirage is just so sad. I didn't read this when it was ASP so it is all fresh and new. I just wish that there was a little more introduction to the new world that you created. I am sure that I will understand more as I read but it does leave me a little confused. You are doing a great job writing this. :)
I've been gone for a couple of months and I just wanted you to know that yours is the first page I came to. I'm really glad you did something with these characters I read some of it when it was with the ASP stories but I like that it's more focused. I'm sorry to see that you haven't been getting the appreciation you wanted so I figured I'd bring some in while I can. Keep up the good writing.
~LDL
My interest is caught. I'd like to know about the curse on mirage. I wish you'd explained why they went in and killed all those vampires. What had they done. Apparently vamps aren't bad in general since one is working in the 'ASP' office. I think you could cut out a tiny bit of the banter between Mirage and Hunter allowing the story to move a bit faster but still convey their relationship to each other.
I've read a few of your stories and they keep getting better and better!
Really liking the set up here, can't wait to read it all :)