by patricia51
Agree with ICASTU, I think we're both probably hopeless romantics who enjoy a happy ending. Like many tales here, both stories get their authors' intentions across to the enjoyment of readers who can avoid being upset by technical errors.
that I asked about Veronica a in the My War story by Leapyearguy. Well done and I really enjoyed it. Thank you for the hard work.
Woodmanone
Yeah, war is hell, ain’t it? BTW, “Cordite” hasn’t been used, except in limited quantities and a few specific situations, since 1945. Too much better stuff out there.
Excellent, except way too short, I want to read more about them, both a sequel, and this small piece really needs to be fleshed out.
Frankly, if this was the only thing you ever wrote, you could have considered yourself a successful writer. I wasn't allowed to serve, so it's not about the memories, but about your ability to make the reader feel the emotions. Well fucking done! Thank you.
VisualPerv
A moving and empathic exploration of a facet of war never envisaged by my generation who served before females were generally accepted in a combat role.
Well done Patricia.
The one commenter that mentioned that only a fellow combat soldier could get along with an old hardnose like Sarge has got it right. One does not quite know how to explain the differences between those that go over and those that don't... It is not that they are better or worse, it is just that when they come back they are different. It's like they no longer belong in the Real World. It's taken me over 40 years to adjust, trying to be too nice to make up for being too hard... I still resent smug, pompous, self-centered civilians. Even though they know no better.
Damn Patricia, your stories are so real to life they bring back memories for some of us. Thanks LT. Ron Wood
Always good. read Leapyear's story first and the two are as good as a marriage could ever be
My congratulations to you both
I read LeapYearGuy's "My War" and thought it was a first-rate story. I really didn't expect an extension of his story could be as good, but it was. You did a great job. Thank you.
Even one young lady that died in a building hit by a missile. I can feel the pain and the love, and I understand the silence and being there with a friend.
As an infantry combat veteran, albeit without the cheerleader companion, and as a grandpa of a Marine with two tours in Fallujah, I feel the recounting of combat action seems to come from first hand. Over all, a real gut grabber.
There couldn't have been a better way to end this story. You did it so well it flowed just as the original. Great read!!
I am reading this on Memorial Day. What a great story. It brings to mind the friends who did not come back from Vietnam and the students who did and did not come back from Irag the first time and the students who have not come back this time. From talking to them, you have captured their life in brief well and added to an already great story for Leapyearguy. Thank you for your fine effort
You are a great writer as is so evident by all the accolades you receive. I found this sequel as a great piece of writing but I am in the single minority as to this adding to leapyearguy’s story. The story on its own is very good but for me diminishes the first when added to it. I find that the realism is affected by the sequel. This is just one reader's thoughts not a real criticism.<p> As I said, this is a very good stand alone story!<p>Thank you for all your effort and the feelings you portray.<p>PT
as usual. Beautifully written and obviously heartfelt. My thanks to the author.
You did a damn good job, Patti.
You really caught the emotions of those who have been on the sharp end.
I've got Mauldin's book. I must have been a infantryman in a previous life because I found his cartoons hilarious. And his 'Protective and Benevolent Association of Them What Has Been Shot At' is an idea that's stayed with me as long as I've known about it.
Wonderful work, Patti. I loved it.
An excellent ending for the story of Kent and Sarge.. Definitely an emotional story like the 'original'.. Makes the eyes mist a little.. The two of them, having gone through the hell, can probably get along very well.. Couldn't really make it with a civilian but another soldier can be fine, a knowing mate.. I read "My War" as you suggested and I find the two excellent stories really do make a complete "happy ending"..
ease up on us a bit!<BR>
An absolutely wonderful partner to LYG's story, though it could easily stand alone.<BR>
I think I can understand <I>some</I> of the emotions of those who served in war zones.<BR>
One of my younger brothers just returned fom his second tour in Iraq. He always did sit and talk with his 'big sis', and this time back home is no exception. It truly is a shame anyone has to go through the sorts of things these warriors do - no one deserves to go thru that.<BR>
Many of my school friends served in Vietnam - we had conscription in Australia to get the numbers - the poor guys did basic training, a couple of months 'jungle training', then shipped out to Vietnam.
Those who made it home were never the same again, some fataly so.<BR>
My dad could never speak about his time in New Guinea in WW2, but it sure wasn't a picnic!<BR>
I will be emailing a link to this and LYG's original to all my friends. It deserves the widest possible distribution.<BR>
Congratulations on a great story.
Some people just get it! Thank you for being a member of that elite group. This is the perfect companion to LYG's story. Taken further and adding dimensions that I didn't expect, wow! I align myself with HDK's comment, it's hard to get an old Sub Sailor bleary eyed and you did it. Thank You for a great story.
There's something wrong with this rating submission form. It only goes to one hundred! :D Thank you, Patricia, for a wonderful story.
do you get tired of hearing all the praise on you great writing. Ditto on what the others said very good story.
Thanks for the effort
Mike from Texas
They won't let me vote twice!
This is so good, so to the point, I wonder if I will ever be gutty enough to write again. Anything I've done, and probably ever will do, isn't even in the same universe as this.
Doug
the story by LYG, without using a few tissues, you're a heartless bastard! One of the acid tests of a short story is the emotion it creates in the reader. These two stories bring it, bigtime. They are both that good.
Patty, having 'been there and done...' all I can say is thanks. A positively beautiful ending to LeapYearGuy's story.
See you around the old lamp post...
Patricia 51, You never fail to write an emotional and moving story. I loved Leapyearguy;s story although I never commented on it. I will correct that as soon as I am done with this comment. For those of us who have been there done that [mine was nam] you have captured so many emotions and fears we all had or have now. My grandfather served in WW I,my dad in WW II so it seems the more things change the more they stay the same. Thank you for a great read and Godspeed to our troops in whatever place they may be now.
I really dion't have a clue how to bring these two back to life. It brought a tear tp my eyes. LYG