11-13.avi; or, The Engagement Ring

"Yeah, lick that dick. That's it."

I wondered if he was talking to my love, my Julia. I wondered if it gave her pleasure to feel cocks inside her that weren't my own, even though she'd already taken another partner. Of course it does, idiot, I thought. It's right in front of you to see.

But truly loving a person means putting her happiness above your own, and as I heard pure joy in the quavering of her voice, and as I had earlier seen the looks of ecstasy on her face, I swelled with pleasure at the thought of her own pleasure. Her joy was my joy, because by leaving me she had arrived in this paradise of indulgence, this height of debauched accomplishment from which she could look down on me far below. I marveled at the image of her lips, my Julia's lips, sliding up and down, slowly and carefully, the long shaft of that fertile cock on the video screen.

The voices in the other room got louder and louder, and then the sound of people milling about, reconfiguring. One of the men whispered something and I heard Tasha say calmly, "I'll get some."

I soon saw her naked body pass quickly without so much as glancing in after me. She went down the hall and as I saw her pass again, I noticed she was carrying a couple of towels.

I again heard what sounded like the wet smacking sounds of fellatio being performed on a number of people and then several more reconfigurations. I could no longer resist and I felt I must bear witness to my Julia's, my love's, happiness.

I slowly looked into the parlor from the hall and my head began to spin as I took in the scene. It was as though I was surrounded on all sides by people who all wished to exterminate me through the act of mindless fucking. I felt like I was drifting into hell with each half step of my foot closer to the parlor. Tasha and Julia were completely nude, their expensive gowns in a heap. The men's clothes were strewn about as well.

The clothes in here are worth more than I have to my name, I thought amidst the sickening squelching sounds. Julia was impaled on both ends by the pricks of two men. She slid back and forth smoothly, the cheeks of her butt bumping against a pair of muscular thighs. And then she slid forward, onto another cock.

"Mm-Mm-Mmuh, Mm-Mm-Mmuh" she said around the obstruction his penis made.

But what was perhaps the most jarring sensory input was in fact the opposite of sensory input; the near total lack of vocalization, apart from my love's faint noises, struck terror into me. It wasn't filled with the overstated yelping that I was accustomed to in the porno movies I'd been watching. Looking back, I think now the relatively understated ambient noise was so striking because it meant that the act of sliding back and forth between these two cocks was, for Julia, a rather mundane activity, even if it was filled with pleasure. For her, it was like reading a book, or receiving a compliment; pleasant and gratifying, but commonplace through the repetition of a routine. This fact piled mountains on top of the weight already on my heart. The silence left the ether of the room open enough that my ears were filled with the quieter sounds of gentle smacking, of sticky wetnesses splutting rhythmically, and my nose was filled with a thick odor of male sweat that invaded my nostrils like a palpable fog. E

Now and then one of the women would let loose an involuntary "UNH!" or one of the men would grunt with effort and pleasure, but it was less frequent than I'd have expected. The haze of sweat and bodily secretions, dominated by the more numerous men, almost made me gag. It was disgusting. It stank. But it was also arousing. I felt I could drown in the revolting stuff happily. This is when I married my pleasure to my disgust, and the pair occupied the same plane as heaven and hell, love and hate. I'd always heard rumors that smell was the most erogenous scent, and now that was driven home irrefutably.

Tasha was fucking one of the men cowgirl-style. As she bounced up and down, she jerked off two of the other men's pricks as they were pushed near her face. The sixth man, I noticed now, was stroking himself and watching Julia as hungrily as I was. Then he walked over and started gently smacking her on the back with his cock while she squirmed forward and backward along the penises she'd claimed with her orifices.

This activity went on for some time as I watched, feeling as though this night's horrors would never end, and craving an end to every part of me. Soon, I saw Julia, my love, stand up. One of the men slid his muscled, sweaty body underneath her, and another moved in behind.

She fucked both of them at the same time. My Julia did.

She lowered herself onto the man beneath her, and I dizzily wondered where I was for a moment. How had my life brought me to this? Everyone in the room seemed to groan in unison now, except for me. I was alone with my shame and euphoria. The man behind Julia slowly, but insistently, nudged his dick into her anus. She let out an "UNGF" and deep moan of pleasure.

I started to weep again, quietly, but I remained unable to tear myself away from this hell of utter depravity. At the same time my passion and adoration and love for my Julia seemed to reach a new peak, in between each distinct sound of her getting fucked into oblivion. But the oblivion was both of ours; therefore, so must be the pleasure of that oblivion.

I wandered into the jungle of bodies, hardly realizing I'd been moving my feet. They all ignored me. Tasha shouted and came, twice in a row. After she caught her breath, she separated herself from the pile of flesh of which she'd been a part, and calmly walked over to me. Her sweaty body glistened, and the entire room continued to be saturated with the stench of sex and men and sex and women. My own scent was submerged in it, just as my being was submerged beneath this panorama of shapely bodies and burning envy.

Tasha walked up to me and yanked at my pants. She slid them down, revealing my penis contained by the plastic mold. No one said anything. Julia continued fucking. One of the men, Peter, walked up nonchalantly and shoved his cock in her face as she bounced up and down on Lee.

Tasha took my hand and led me over to Julia. She tapped the man on the shoulder who had been sodomizing my love. He complained good-naturedly, but slowly pulled himself out of her and moved out of the way.

"No," I said weakly, in a complete daze. "No, no this isn't happening."

They ignored me. Tasha pushed my head down towards the nexus of hips that belonged to Julia and whichever of the men she was riding. The fuckstench grew even stronger up close. Tasha gradually applied less force and I, in a daze, started to propel my own face towards her now-vacant rear. But at the last moment I hesitated, revolted. She pushed my mouth into her ass, some man's cock mere centimeters away, working my love into yet another peak.

"Tongue," she said, simply.

I stuck it out. I tasted of her temple of waste, and my spirit was broken when she cried out in renewed pleasure in response to my tongue.

Julia. Such dark delights as this I could never have imagined her participating in.

I gagged and leaned back from a moment, watching her grind up and down, but soon I came back. I wanted to help her, you see. I wanted to help her finish my undoing. I overcame my instinctive nausea at tasting such a forbidden part of the body the more she appeared to enjoy it.

Soon, Tasha pulled me back by my greasy hair, and then used her other hand to gracefully assist Julia in dismounting the man she had been grinding on. Lee moved to the side and Julia got to her knees. Tasha pushed me down onto my knees behind Julia, and she in turn knelt behind me.

"All of you, now," Tasha commanded them.

They started to line up, all of them stroking their penises and looking hungrily at Julia, some of them even glancing over at Tasha. Even though they certainly weren't, I felt like they were looking at me, and I reflexively panicked.

"Patrick, this is your job," Tasha said as she took each of my hands and wrapped them around to Julia's front. I was pressed firmly against Julia, Tasha against me, as I was forced to caress Julia's beautiful, perfect breasts.

I raged inside. I continued to die as her nipples hardened in my grasp.

Peter then positioned himself so that his cock was in between Julia's breasts, within grasp of my own fingers. My hands, guided by Tasha's, pushed her breasts together around his glistening penis, and then rubbed them up and down on it. Peter moaned. Julia cackled fiercely and shook her butt rhythmically against my enclosed member while I helped her, my love, give a titjob to Peter.

Her breasts. They were so soft and full. I could suckle from them forever. But that salvation remained impossible.

And then they started to get a little moist as Peter's pre-cum leaked out onto the inner parts of her cleavage. I could smell everyone's sweat and pheremones. My mind reached dizzying new heights of pain and passion.

Tasha guided my hands and playfully stimulated Peter some more with Julia's body. His moans grew louder. He pulled back a little and stroked his penis faster and faster, while Tasha held my hands, and my hands held Julia's breasts slightly raised, waiting for him to orgasm. Pushing them up in welcome of his offering.

Her breasts. My hands.

I continued to die.

Peter swore loudly and I felt hot semen spurt haphazardly onto Julia's breasts and my hands. Tasha, commandeering my hands, jiggled Julia's tits up and down as the sticky white substance crept in between my fingertips and Julia's nipples. She turned around and kissed me with a delicious grin and hungry eyes. Julia grabbed one of my hands and sucked on each finger, while another one of the men stepped into Peter's place.

Tasha made me repeat this humiliation for ten minutes while the rest of them turned Julia into a mess of white hot jism. My Julia, my love, how could you. I love you. And I hate you.

I was embarrassed to find that I had leaked out semen into the plastic piece, and my penis was now stewing in its own drying juices. I don't even remember orgasming, I was so caught up in the hell of that moment. The heaven of that moment.

After the last man dumped his load of sperm onto my Julia, my love, and I finished rubbing it into her soft breasts, I was pulled shakily to my feet by Tasha and Julia. I was in a daze, and I might have been weeping openly. My ass felt like it was on fire with pleasure, like it was so awakened to its senses that it could taste the air itself. I had never experienced such a deranged state of intense arousal. I was led, shaking, like a frightened lamb, into the living room. In the parlor, all the men seemed to be wiping themselves off with the towels that Tasha had retrieved.

But the women were far from done with me.

"Sit," Julia said. She went into the kitchen as I sank into the couch. My hands became sticky as the sweat and filth began to dry into my skin. I heard her pick up the bowl from the counter, open the microwave, set the timer, and start it. Tasha pulled a large dildo from a drawer, followed by a pair of panties with a harness. She calmly strapped them on, not even bothering to look at me.

"Almost done!" Julia called with a delirious giggle. Tasha smiled while she looked down at the dildo she'd strapped on to herself. In a few seconds, the microwave beeped and Julia retrieved the glass bowl. The murky-white slush was now a thick liquid. It wasn't too hot, but it definitely gave off a little warmth when Julia sat it down on the floor near me and Tasha.

"Over here," she snapped. I crawled to her.

"I think you liked that little dick you had in your ass while you watched us, didn't you?"

I couldn't answer. It had felt good. But I couldn't talk.

"Answer me, or you don't get the ring back and you leave now. Abd you know you need that money. Besides, I think you'd do it just because I ask you to, regardless" A thin line between heaven and hell, I thought. I wanted to weep again but I felt emotionally dead. My cock was softening in a small pool of drying semen.

"Yes," I said finally. "Yes."

"It's time to graduate. Congratulations," she said. "Turn around."

I did as instructed. I stared at the bowl, not daring to guess what this fresh terror could be.

But I knew. It was Julia's conquest.

"I made sure not to cum too much," Julia told me. I looked around uncomprehendingly, and she was rubbing her clit. "You should thank me, because it's going to save you some pain." She moved up to a position near my ass, kneeling behind me while I remained on all fours. Bent over and exposed, my asshole remained aflame and sensitized such that it seemed it could taste the pungent air, and it craved more. After a moment of jerking herself off as crudely as any man, she began to gush her warm nectar over the inner folds of my ass. The gentle splashes of ejaculate were a heavenly, cleansing rain and I let out uncontrollable exclamations. I sounded like an animal dying in despair. But her heat tasted like paradise.

"Now fuck him," she instructed Tasha. "Fuck his pussy."

Tasha slowly introduced her fake cock into me, using Julia to lubricate my repurposed behind.

Tasha's cock slowly entered and I yelped. She nudged me towards some precipice at my body's core, and I let out a moan of half-pain and half-pleasure as she backed out and slowly in again. It seemed to get easier each time. It seemed to feel a little nicer each time. With each thrust growing in strength, I felt I was becoming one with a kind of death-delirium, and that Julia was thriving off of my retreat into it. She mocked my desperate sounds, lording over me the fact of her ability to own her own pleasure, while I was helplessly consumed within the shadow of hers. Julia slowly positioned us so that my face edged over the bowl each time Tasha thrust into me. I felt like my whole body would explode and my mind would be gone forever.

"If you want that ring, and the money, you're gonna retrieve with your mouth. It's at the bottom of the bowl," Julia said.

"What-" I gasped. "W-w-what is-" I stammered.

"It's those six guys in there. Don't worry, you've already had them anyway. This is just what we've saved up for you in the past month of partying."

The heat baked off of the pool of filth and wafted into my face.

Welcome to hell.

Julia swirled a finger around in the hot, white honey, and tweaked my lips briefly with it. I gagged in response, trying to keep the pleasurable rhythm with which my buttocks slammed back into Tasha's hips. I felt like a dead thing skewered over a spit as Julia pushed her glazed fingers into my mouth. Then, she pulled her fingers out, and pushed my gasping mouth into the small pool of manspunk.

I exhaled sharply in a panic, screaming, and spluttering cum all over. I cried. My Julia, my love. I hate you. You are my hell.

I came again into the cock mold as I wept and pinched my engagement ring between my lips while in the viscous fluid. Then I pulled my head out of the muddled soup and slowed my pumping rear. The ring fell to the carpet. The touchless orgasm that shuddered through my penis died quickly, but my anus wouldn't stop. I convulsed as my asshole seemed to have an orgasm of its own. It doesn't make sense, but it felt like the nerves in my anus had rendered the orgasm in my cock completely hollow and unsatisfactory. Before I could wipe the fetid spunk off of my mouth, Tasha yanked me up by the hair and wrapped a hand partway around my throat. Julia leaned up and started to kiss me passionately, playfully smearing the cum around my mouth and spitting some onto my tongue. Tasha leaned around, exchanged a look with Julia, and they simultaneously moved in towards my face.

Grinning, Julia said, "stick out that dirty tongue."

Tasha also had a smile on her face, and as I stuck it out, both women took turns gently sucking on my tongue as though it were the penis of one of the well-endowed men in the parlor. They made gentle love to it, suddenly adopting the care of a nurse tenderly administering to a patient. They flicked it with their own tongues . Julia, my love, my hate, took it fully into her mouth, gently swallowing all of my being, and then slowly backed her lips off. As she did, it felt like all the pleasure was pulled from my anus and rippled up my back one last time, went out through my tongue into her body, and then my body gave up the ghost, and the pleasure was gone.

And I was finally dead.

I must have passed out then, because when I woke up everybody was gone. I was on the floor sleeping, naked and with my cock free of the cage. The crusty ring was on the floor in front of my face. My face hurt, its pores clogged with the dried glaze of the night's evils. I sat up, head pounding, horrified that I had survived my own death. I dressed, feeling dizzy, nauseous, ecstatic, and horrified all at once.

I hate you, Julia. I want you out of my life forever.

I left as quickly as possible. When I arrived home, I fell asleep again.

I slept for a long time.

The next few days were as horribly boring as most days are when you have no job and no money to spend. I was able to pawn the engagement ring, but didn't get as much as I'd expected for it. My thoughts were mostly occupied with either nothing at all, or with the hellish tableau of fucking that I had both been a part of, as a bizarre nexus of humiliation, and cruelly excluded from.

Earlier tonight I got an e-mail from her. It's the one I read right now as I try to determine the course of the rest of my life. It opens with a rather mundane:

--"Hi Patrick! I'm so glad you could come to the party the other night. --

The e-mail has one attachment. I love you, Julia. I hate you, Julia, and I want you out of my life forever.

The attachment just says, mysteriously, "11-13.avi".

--Anyway, it felt so good to get to talk to you and catch up on old times! I'm so sorry things aren't going very well for you at the moment. Don't worry though, you'll find someone new soon, I'm sure of it. Though it might not be a bad idea to hit the gym or something; don't take that the wrong way, I'm just worried about your health is all."--

I am still dead, no matter what size my stomach is.

I want you gone forever. But I want you always to be happy. And I want to be able to watch your happiness.

--So I don't know if you had much fun at the party. I'm so sorry, sometimes I just get caught up in hostessing! ;) --

--But in any case, I had a -really- good time and I think this is a good step for us. I'm so glad you're willing to be friends. Most guys wouldn't! See? I always knew you were special in some way! --

--Since the night was so wonderful, I thought you might like a little memento of the evening. So that you NEVER forget it. I've attached an avi file; the video quality isn't great, but Tasha was able to edit together the best shots from all three cameras that were in the parlor. --

I won't give her the satisfaction. I'm deleting this horror, this atrocity. But I am dead, so I feel powerless to do that.

My Julia. My heaven. My hell.

I save the file to my hard drive. I gulp my bourbon faster than usual. I unzip my pants and begin to plunge myself forward into oblivion once more.