All Comments on 'A Taste of Sarah Ch. 01'

I enjoyed the storyline very much, but the dialogue was a bit hard to follow at times. I look forward to reading more.

And well worth continuing please.

A nice twist to the online meeting idea. You have several layers of things happening which, as justahole mentioned, makes it tricky to follow at times. It's porn, we don't want to have to work at it and pay attention.... :D:D:D

Putting his onscreen directions in italics was good, but then we must sort on screen conversation, off screen thoughts, on screen 'story' action/dialogue. You need to find additional ways to delineate these things.

And is he Luke or Frank...or Frank with the on screen name Luke?

Try to find some one to give future chapters a read through. Tell them you need to know not just 'did ya like it,' but 'did anything not make sense.'

Looking forward to the future adventures of Sarah/LukeFrank. ;)

This was very good, especially as a debut story, although I feel you must have written quite a bit before submitting this story to Literotica.

Multi-layered, as the previous comment pointed up, this was a most enjoyable, if sometimes a little difficult to follow story - and I find myself worrying about 'perpetually' - but then again, this might be one of those US/UK things - yet again!

Welcome to the site, please write more for us and again, well done.

I really enjoyed the varying layers, the depth of the character Luke. The BDSM stories on here have become a bit dull, I like the peak into the dominant mind that you've added. The psychology behind the sub/dom relationship is the intoxicating part. Keep it up.

the author got a dictionary last christmas...

You simply must continue this delightful story.

Absolutely breathtaking! Still there’s always a slight divergence what is erotic in a written format doesn’t always translate to reality, in your story Sarah read his story, followed his instructions and orgasmed because of a combination of the story, his commands and her actions. Would she have responded as well to being caned? Maybe if she had been edged for 2 weeks who knows?

I know that if I was in that situation the prospect of being caned even after 2 weeks of edging would freak me out, erotic pain is the good kind of pain but for me I think the cane is too much like real pain, just like face slapping for me that would be a massive turn off and likely to invoke a similar reaction. Not everyone is a “pain slut”, that said just because I’m not one it doesn’t mean I won’t enjoy reading about them.

Your story was almost overwhelming in its reality, so descriptive and vivid. For me it was an automatic 5 stars. Thanks for sharing.

Tess (UK)

Thank you for the constructive feedback Tess. Your comment about the cane is good and I'll think more about it in the future. I was try to conjure a cane used to walk that line between light pain (not excruciating) and pleasure. The connotations of cane do imply something more vigorous or corporal and I'll think about this in the future.