All Comments on 'Anti Valentine's Day'

by MissyDemeanors

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  • 7 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Very good

This should have a few more chapters. I love the characters. Very well done but I feel that it ended to soon. Maybe the girls could play again sometime. It seems that Julie has maybe found a dominant side of herself. Maybe even a switch. Maybe on the next girl's night they can explore that more. Maybe even bringing in the lesbian co workers workers into play.

AlexClaytonAlexClaytonover 8 years ago
Needs More

I would've given this 5 stars had it not been for a couple of items.

1: length. There was so much potential here to go even further with it and I probably would've done a follow up for when Dominic returns from deployment.

2: suspension of disbelief. No MP, military guard, security personnel, or anyone else that I know of in Dominic's deployment would've been allowed to Skype while on guard duty let alone even contemplate showing someone over the computer where they're at. I won't even go into the fact that he was basically masturbating while on duty and none of his squad mates caught him. -1 Star.

Other than that, great story!

MissyDemeanorsMissyDemeanorsover 8 years agoAuthor

I cut it short just for the sake of the contest. I had a lot of fun with it and wanted others to enjoy the idea of their own each back story, Speaking from personal experience Ive had a few guy friends Skype date their girls when they were suppose to be on duty but I never implied where he's located either. Just somewhere over seas. My ex was stationed in japan and he didn't see a lick of action, His buddies would dick around on duty all the time. The focus wasn't really meant to be on him sorry for the disappoint there.

EosAuroraEosAuroraabout 8 years ago
Fantastic

I don't mind it was short, I enjoyed it perfectly. The story flowed well in my opinion and I could honestly see this happen so that was cool. I loved the bond you built between the girls, made the last few paragraphs even more sweet.

MissyDemeanorsMissyDemeanorsabout 8 years agoAuthor
thank you <3

Thanks Eos I appreciate the compliment

BurntRedstoneBurntRedstoneabout 8 years ago
A lovely well paced story

I really enjoyed your story! The characters had depth and their bond was crafted with care. Thank you for sharing this with us!

MissyDemeanorsMissyDemeanorsabout 8 years agoAuthor
thank you

Thanks burntredstone I appreciate the feedback :)

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