All Comments on 'Ashley, Released Pt. 01'

Yawn inducing. How old are you? The writing came across extremely childish.

Hi Anonymous,

Since you're interested, I'm 31. Also, english isn't my first language but I'll try to get better. Glad you had a good night's sleep because of me!

Damn there better be a chapter 2. Any chance you can add some pictures. lol

Hey,

Sorry no pictures but glad you liked it! Yeah, will start working on chapter 2 soon..

Keep this story going.

Who cares if English is your second language? Great cock sucking! 👍 I hope the nautical stories posted on July 4th have great sex and maybe even a plot! 5 *s!

AMerryman

I don't like where this is going, but I may be wrong.

I hope this isn't another brain damaged boyfriend.

Is this leading towards him being a cuckold?

You post Chapter 1 when you haven't even STARTED on Chapter 2? Not good.

MAYBE I'll check back when this is complete.

Good read! Good times! Like the progress and directuion. Good stuff!

more like 16,425 I have never wanted my wife to be a slut. Yes on a few of those days we used different things such as vocal and visual to enhance the play, but never have I wanted for her to be one.

Your people have only been together for fifteen months and he can't wait to see her be a slut in public? This relationship is doomed to fail (apparently on the beach in southeast Italy).

Says he loves her, is engaged to her, but wants her to be a slut in public. What an ass, and if you think this is what real life is ..... I feel bad for you.

Read the genre title.

- Married extra-marital fun: swinging, sharing & more.

Of course she is going to be fucked by others

A hot woman like that and he's trying to get her to want to share herself with someone else....total bonehead move. Simply amazing the number of guys who hate their girls enough to degrade them like that. You write pretty well, but the storyline is nonsense.

Great start, hope to see more, and do your best to ignore the weird puritan cult that has taken up residence in this category that swarms every cheating wife story with negative comments.

I do appreciate that some people took a couple minutes to add a comment and I think both positive and negative feedback can be constructive.

For those who don't approve of this story because that's not your thing, that's absolutely fine. Having said that, the 'Loving Wives' category is about (as per Literotica) swinging, sharing & more.

Lesson learned though: I will add a couple lines before Pt. 02 as a disclaimer that this type of thing is what this story is about.

And how is this a wife story? Correct me if I'm wrong, but they don't seem to be married to each other. Also the boyfriend seems to have willing cuckold tendencies. In another words just another willing scumbag who wants to see his girlfriend fuck others. That's erotic? Maybe in your world, but not in mine. Sorry, this one didn't do it for me. Wrong category = one star.

First, Author, it is a good first effort, and a very effective lead-in to a story that will become about sharing. No Martian slut ray here! Sometimes critics force authors to choose between bad choices or just ignore them entirely, but you made the better choice: providing some background--also known as hot sex--that leads up to the decision to share. To us sharing fans (distinct from cuckold fans), this is like foreplay before the agreed-upon fling. It's what makes the story about two loving people acting in coordination with each other.

Of course, it helps that she's a real hottie, including the requisite DD boob size, but it's your story, and maybe it's more common in your culture for the hotties to be busty. Some readers prefer their porn to be closer to reality. Regardless, the 2 rules of fantasy porn are to make the women hot and the sex hotter. I look forward to more postings, the sooner the better.

Second, it has long been accepted that a story about sharing--or even cucking--doesn't require a marriage license to be in Loving Wives. I do agree with the critics that it is harder to believe that a loving relationship will survive its inevitable bumps and strains if a couple seeks sexual adventure before getting married, but that doesn't mean you have to seek a new category for that story. Some couples break up after the event, just like some marriages, because love, respect and sex are all vital to most relationships AND stories. Some commenters are just yammering, not really suggesting you move the story; others would plead with you not to pollute the other categories(unless they're trying to marginalize you into the dustbin of Fetish) by moving it; and still others want to behave as though fiancée-sharing offends their Loving Wife sensibilities in ways wife-sharing doesn't. Ignore them all. Your category choice is fine.

I like your pacing. The fact that you are drawing out the sexual activity is a plus to me. Yes, you let us see what is coming, but when it arrives it was worth the anticipation. If your next installment is paced like this one, I will think we have a budding star on our hands. The biggest problem with this kind of pacing is that authors usually reread and tinker with their postings repeatedly before submitting each chapter, so we get impatient. I hope you don't feel obligated to do that.

down and down till it gets into the mud.

One Star.

Re "I can't remember when it was ok" blah blah blah.

Well, that's funny, because your history is so recent that you've obviously not lived through this discussion before. Oh, I'm sorry, you don't have a history? That's because you don't have a profile. And the reason you don't have a profile? Because you're not an actual part of this community. And yet you want to interpret rules for everyone who is.

You want to tell me not only to get my sh*t together, but HOW to get it together, while you're still an irresponsible entitled invisible anonny, voicing an overinflated opinion from the back of the crowd because the author allows you to. F*ck off. This is fantasy and fiction, where the vitally important commitment of real-life marriage is erased with a backspace key.

You want to put me in my place? Register a name. Own your thoughts. Try to win a discussion or argument, either one. But you aren't going to shove us community members around by throwing hand grenades from the cheap seats, and then disappearing back into Anonny-land.

Evidently you consider your opinion to be as cheap as it is free, yet you think it should matter to somebody. On second thought, don't register. You spend too much time in fantasyland already. How soon do you have to start paying on your student loans?

Cry much? Let's see just took a glance at your biography, low and behold "No Answer" on every single question. And you have a fucking record? Go fuck yourself ass wipe. Nobody asked for your opinion, so keep it to yourself. You're just another anonymous bitch like all the rest of the readers, that thinks by whining he's king shit.

He's got a perfect little future slut there. If she were mine she'd be getting all the cock she wanted.

Has the potential to be incredibly hot. And yes, finances count in the Loving Wives category according to Literotica. It's such a shame that authors take time to write these stories and then these self-righteous sons of bitches put everyone of them down. I sincerely hope this author joins the others who don't put up with this nonsense and deletes those asswipes who contribute nothing here but hatred.

Thank you Aymar31 for the start to a very enjoyable story.

Great story, especially for a first timer. You are a good writer and this was a very hot story. Both my wife and I enjoyed it. I identified with the husband’s observation on the beach “Could she not know? "Surely she gets looks on a regular basis…And more importantly, did she ever fantasize about anyone else.”

I know that once a husband starts thinking those thoughts, and shares them with his wife, it is only a matter of time until she starts wondering the same thing. That is a woman’s natural curiosity. We were at the beach in Playa del Carmen in Mexico, when we went down that path.

My wife did not believe me when I told her that every man in the place would like to fuck her. So, I challenged her. I told her to hang out alone all day; on the beach, in town for lunch, and then, later that evening, go to the bar alone. I prohibited her from taking off her wedding ring and she had to at least be receptive toward men’s advances.

She loves shopping, so, I told her I would give her a $100 Nordstrom’s gift card for every man’s phone number that she could snag. However, she had to at least take the flirtation up to the point where she knew that it was a potential sexual hook up, if she were to call him back.

God lord, at the end of the day, she eagerly brought 12 guy’s phone numbers back to our room. And, I was on the hook for a $1,200 gift card! I immediately bent her over a chair, in front of a huge mirror, and started banging her from behind - as she stared into my eyes in the mirror. I kept getting her close to an orgasm but, did not let her cum. I told her to admit that she would love to fuck them. After about half an hour of this edging, she started screaming that she wanted to fuck all of them. Then, and only then, did I let her cum.

The next morning, I gave her another good wake up fucking in the same manner. After that, she had internalized this Neural Linguistic Programming, essentially self-hypnosis. During our one-week stay, she fucked six different guys. She conceived the first of our three children on that vacation. And, our other two children were conceived in a similar manner, with other men impregnating her.

Hot story and wife fucking others in reality is not my thing but I know quite a few who have but they are usually doing there own thing behind her back. Fantasy is great but when you act on it it can be damaging, I know it would be for me. This couple went to Italy, Germany, France, England and Greece. His wife a guy she picked up in each country while he watched and they went to swinger clubs where he and her fucked others together. The last guy they thought was Greek the night before heading home turned out to be from turkey. He was so rough taking her ass and leaving marks all over her body. He claims they never cheated and being married for 35 years wanted to try it and he said it all was good except that last one. They’ll never do it again . Another much older guy with no kid said him and his wife alway swing on vacation. The craziest was in Amsterdam he let her be sold for one night at a bar but the deal was he had to go along . It was humiliating because he’s a older very racist guy and had to watch his wife get fucked by some younger black guy from Africa all night. Crazy shit

treat women anyway they will let you. If its all good, good. If you hurt anyone you will one day pay. Somehow, somewhere, you will pay. Ask me how I know.

Good luck with future efforts.

No offense but as a sometimes editor, I have noticed a certain non-fluency in your writing I associated with ESL writers.

I have come to find there are many out there under forty who just lack fluency in writing due to lack of practice.

If that ain't you, I apologise, but if it it is you, keep writing, read more classic/post 1900 American authors

Or should I say, "Has the three-headed fly gone yet?"

Aymar31, I apologize for turning your comment section into--well, whatever it became. As I stated before, your story has the potential to become what few others do, tracing the sexual and relationship journey of a young couple. I assume that's what you are going to attempt. In my perception, it is very difficult to keep the love and respect primary for your characters when your literary goal is to turn the girlfriend into the biggest slut possible. But, hey, let's go for it.

To the (multiple) Anonnys who put me in my place:

This is me dialing it back. I am deescalating the war of words. But you're still wrong.

First, you used the same sentence structure, the same format, the same tone, the same questions, the same logic in using my own profile to shut me down, and the same inability to read my attacks comprehensively on all three of your sequential anonymous responses to me. In so doing, you illustrate my point: you irresponsible anonnys hide behind your anonymity. I think your priority in commenting and arguing is winning.

Second, I think you are not interested in making this board a better place. If you were, you would be more loyal to logic and open to discuss viewpoints that differ from yours. Repeatedly saying, "Guidelines are there for a reason" demonstrates that you don't know what that reason is and you have no experience in establishing guidelines that encourage all behaviors (I am quite sure you do have experience establishing guidelines that RESTRICT certain behaviors.)

Third, it was obvious you didn't want your sensibilities offended by this story in this category. Is it the premarital sex that bothers you? Or the fiancée sharing? Why does it matter that he is sharing her when they haven't even promised yet 'to forsake all others'? You say this sex could go in Erotic Couplings, but that is more for non-relationship sex. Loving Wives is for sex when a woman steps outside of her straight, monogamous relationship. In order to step outside it, she has to be in it to start with. The relationship requirement is more substantial than her actual status in the relationship. And if you are offended that easily, did no one tell you that this is a porn website? Porn is considered to be sexual behavior outside the norm, even if all it is is talking about it openly. That's still aberrant behavior.

And don't think you're hurting my feelings by calling me a "prevert". You probably are, too, or you wouldn't be here (though I'd love to know what a prevert is).

Fourth, Literotica does not (to my knowledge) police its categories. Category choice is left to the authors at the time of publication. In order for a story to have its category changed, (i think this is true) the author must pull the story and republish it. All current comments will be lost, and discussions ended. Believe it or not, authors like to have their work discussed. So if an author makes a poor choice regarding category, he will usually stick with his original choice rather than reposting the story.

Fifth, and this is the main point, being a registered community member gets you more respect than YELLING IN ALL CAPS, pontificating about politics, legislating your interpretation of category guidelines, using abusive language to an author who has just posted something worthy of articulate language, calling yourself (an anonymous) BiG BoY, or even being right or demanding respect. The community members have widespread, differing opinions, and some are pretty extreme; but no named member has ever spoken as abusively to me as Anonnys do. Of course, i ask for it; when i see abusive anonnys bullying and trying to cuckold an author, I won't stand for it. An author is allowed to express himself creatively however he chooses (within a very broad range), and when you try to control his story you might as well be cucking him. Yet you gotta pretend you're the bull, don't you?

Last, when I challenged you Anonnys to register, i was not implying that giving Literotica your personal info makes you a better person; i was stating that getting a name forces you to be more honest and respectful in your dealings with others. It prevents anonymous bullying. Yes, i realize that some 40-60% of all anonymous comments are worthwhile. But that means 40-60% are thoughtless or worse. Have you ever thrown a hand grenade at your spouse, even during a fight? Of course not, we all want to have makeup sex so good we can write stories about it! Then why do we throw verbal hand grenades in our critique? Because we obviously don't care if the author ever writes anything inspirational ever again. We are being destructive, not constructive.

I hope this clears the air a little. I don't hate Anonnys. I was one, for about 18 months, and at times i found myself saying things i was ashamed of ( though,not often).

Now that i've joined, i try to encourage anonnys to become regular contributors in the comments using an identifier. I really don't care who you really are, just what you think. Using an identifier allows us all to get to know the person you are projecting to us.

Thanks for reading

I neither read the story nor submitted a score for it but would like to express my thanks to the writer for the warning not to read it.