Ask Alice Ch. 06

"What have you been doing for two years?" Alice asked.

"Shadowing you. When the other Alice bought a condo here in San Francisco I moved to the city too. My other self was no slouch when it came to squirreling away money. At least we had THAT in common. She had enough to put down for a place here in San Francisco."

"Well here I am Lieutenant," Alice said. "Now what?"

"I've detected sources of technologies that may be from the future like me," Haiku said. "I want you to help me track them down. Maybe I can find both of us a way home."

"She's been a busy girl," Britt said.

Haiku gave Alice a narrow look. "You tilted your head in that way only people with companion app do back home."

Haiku's cell phone rang in her jacket pocket. She pulled it out and frowned at the number on the ID. "That's your number," she said as she put the phone to her ear.

"Hello, Mavis," Britt said in Alice's ear and apparently in Haiku's too.

"Who is this?" Haiku asked.

"I'm hurt that you don't remember me," Britt said. "I'm Alice's faithful suicide phone."

"Brad? You came over with her?" Haiku asked astonished.

"The name is Britt."

"Holy shit," Haiku said. "He can be super useful in our hunt!"

"Why should I help you," Britt asked.

"You gotta do what Alice says," Haiku said.

"Did you bug my room?" Alice asked.

"Don't have THAT kind of money," Haiku said. "My guess is Imperial Corporation is behind that. I'm more of a low grade stalker. I dropped by the book signing. You looked jumpy and out of place. It was clear to me that you had finally appeared."

"And why should I help you?" Alice asked.

"Don't you want to go back to your original dimension?" Haiku asked.

Alice shrugged and took a sip of her beer. "This ain't too different from my world. I could settle here."

"What about you Britt?" Haiku asked. "This place must seem medieval to you. It sure is to me."

"I'm a big fish in this little pond," Britt said. "I don't mind that. Plus, I like Alice, she's added new meaning to my life."

"Okay you two can stay behind," Haiku said. "Help me get out of your hair."

"Lieutenant—" Alice said.

"Call me Mavis," Haiku insisted.

"Mavis ... I REALLY don't trust you."

"I wanna go home, Alice," Haiku said sounding sincere and a little desperate.

Alice signed. "We'll hear you out."

"Good," Haiku said. "Back in my time the IIW got wind of a project that Viturvian had found a way to USE Liner energy in a virtual reality video game. We already knew that they were tapping liners to help energize worm drives. Anyway, I was assigned to look into Viturvian's project. One of my monitor robots picked up an interesting power signature. I recorded the signature on my light phone but never had a chance to look into it because of the Liner round up and then your wormhole kidnapped me.

"I had no control over that," Alice said.

"My light phone came over with me but has proven totally useless."

"What was the make?" Britt asked.

"A Dexter Galaxy."

Britt sniffed. "The second dumbest FTL put out by Dexter."

"That's why I picked that Dexter," Haiku said. "No chance of it going AI on me. Wish I had picked differently though. I could USE a truly smart phone right about now. Anyway, with the help of a friend who knows computers, I discovered the exact same Viturvian power signature here in this time and dimension."

"I don't believe you," Britt said.

"That I was able to detect the signature?" Haiku asked.

"No, that you have a friend," Britt said.

"Be nice," Alice said doing her best to not to laugh. Haiku seemed unfazed by the jibe though. Apparently, IIW spies have thick skins.

"I too have detected pockets of technologies that can't possibly be from here," Britt said. "Show me the signature."

Haiku hit some buttons on her phone.

"Got it," Britt said. "I see what what you mean. THIS is clearly not of this time. I'll see if I can find it and get a closer look."

"Be careful," Haiku said. "Who knows who's behind all this."

"Careful is my middle name."

"Don't you lead the FBI or the CIA back to me," Alice warned.

Haiku frowned and turned her phone so that Alice could see the screen displaying a funky emoji sarcastically rolling its eyes. "You watch too much Brain Tube spy thrillers," Britt said from the phone and went on his way.

"You really think somebody from your time is out there?" Alice asked.

"We popped in. Maybe somebody else did too. I just hope it will to lead a way home."

"Is it so bad here?"

"You wanna go back to 1983 and stay THERE forever?" Haiku asked.

Alice shivered. "I'll help you go home. I kind of owe you. You gave me time to get away in that hotel room."

Haiku shrugged. "I'm just glad that fucked up Marco the rotbot didn't come with us. A robot killing a human is rare and outrageous. Whom ever was in charge of it's programing is in deep shit if ever I ever get a hold of them."

"The IIW guy who got killed was a friend?" Alice asked.

"Hell no," Haiku said. "I wanted to kill Damion myself a number of times. But robots killing humans is considered the ultimate of unspeakable sins."

She recalled the beautiful and scary Lucy a renegade class-X sex-bot from the future on her crusade to free other AI's. It was Lucy who had told her the story of a serial killer robot name Clarice Moon also a class-X.

The pair sat in silence for a minute. Finally, Haiku spoke. "Finish your drink. I want to show you something that only you will appreciate." Haiku made no offer to pay the bill so Alice paid and left a hefty tip.

Out on the streets of San Francisco, they walked for several blocks allowing Alice time to give the IIW agent a good once over. The woman definitely hadn't let herself go in her two year wait. Her figure was still firm and spectacular boasting a pair of high end C's, maybe even D's. Her butt and shapely legs added to her perfection. She wore jeans, black suede boots, a flattering, snug blue top and a black leather jacket. When Alice last saw the Lieutenant, her hair was done up in corn rolls. Now her hair was long to her shoulders, shiny and brown.

"You dating?" Alice asked curious.

Haiku laughed. "The Mavis of this world had a boyfriend but the guy was a total tool. When I told him to get out he hit me."

"Really? What you do?"

"I dropped him off at Maui Memorial Hospital. He'll always think of me when he limps."

"The other Alice have a man?" Haiku asked.

"I haven't been back long enough to know," Alice said. "You've been stalking me for two years, you tell me?"

"You were living with a guy named Nelson in Honolulu. When your book hit the sci-fi best sellers list you dumped him. He didn't take it well. Here we are."

They were on the edge of a park. It was a little after eight in the evening so the place was almost empty. "You wanna show me the park?" Alice asked confused.

Haiku pointed at a bench under a clump of trees lit by a lamp post. The bench faced a Starbucks across the street. Seated on the bench was a man. They approached the bench but the man took no notice of them, he just stared ahead at the Starbucks. The guy was Asian and looked homeless.

"You want me to talk to this homeless guy?" Alice asked.

"That's the friend who helped me trace the technology signature on my FTL." Haiku gestured for her to get closer.

"Hello?" Alice said. The dude didn't respond and kept looking at the coffee shop. "Who is he?" Alice asked.

"It wasn't that long ago that you last saw him," Haiku said.

"Just tell me who this is suppose to be?" Alice said irritated with the game.

"Picture him with blue skin," Haiku said.

Alice covered her mouth with both hands and said, "The Valentine surrogate? Is this a weird echo of him?"

The man looked at Alice for the first time. He smiled and said, "Hello Alice."

"He's no echo," Haiku said. "This is Val from the future you pulled him through just like me."

"How come he's not blue anymore?" Alice asked.

"I am no longer beholden to the laws of the Inner Cluster," Val said. "It didn't take much to deactivate the installed pigment damper. But if you like, I can revert to my natural blue state?" His skin turned a startling bright blue.

"No!" both Haiku and Alice yelled at once. Val's skin returned to a normal human tone. Alice and Haiku looked around, fortunately, no one had seen.

"Why do you look like a homeless guy?" Alice asked.

"Because he is," Haiku said sounding angry.

"I'm sorry Mavis," Val said. "Have I gone into one of my fugue states again?"

"Yes," Haiku said curtly.

"Fugue state?" Alice asked.

"Yes," Val said in his smooth perfect, baritone. "It is outside my control. I disconnect from the world for days at a time."

"It's been a month," Haiku said. "I walked him home twice but he drifted away each time."

"I go where the YIFY is best," Val said.

"You've been living in the streets for a month?" Alice asked incredulous.

"Apparently," Val said. "I could use a bath."

"I checked on him everyday," Haiku said.

"That is kind of you Mavis," Val said. "But you needn't worry. I can protect myself and I'm impervious to the elements. I don't need to eat, just a sugary drink every now and then." He leaned toward Alice who leaned back a bit because of his strong odder. Weirdly it wasn't unpleasant, he smelled like a forest after a heavy rain. "Have you tried cream soda?" he said to Alice. "It's the balm."

Alice laughed but quickly stifled it when she saw Haiku's stoney expression.

"I'm safe here Mavis," Val said. "I've made many friends among the park dwellers. They look out for me too."

"I think Lieutenant Haiku would prefer that you stay with her.," Alice said. "Mavis worries about you."

"No offense but I feel more at home with the broken people of Golden Gate park," Val said.

Haiku's face turned to stone. It made Alice wish she hadn't started the conversation.

After a long silence, Haiku said. "You coming home tonight?"

"Yes," Val said. "Nine okay?"

Haiku nodded and walked away.

Totally confused, Alice followed the ex-Imperial Navy Officer into a nearby watering hole. They made a bee line to the bar and sat at one end. The place was busy a mix of working class locals and business suits. Haiku ordered a shot of vodka then followed it with a beer chaser. Alice settled for a glass of white wine. Halfway through Haiku's beer chaser, Alice dared to ask, "What happened when you first arrived?"

"Like I said, I popped in the middle of the other Mavis' life. She was watching a TV show on the flattest most boring entertainment screen I had ever seen. No FTL holo, no interactive, no 3D options. It was a ridicules show called 'The Apprentice.'"

"Donald Trump," Alice said. "I hear he's running for president."

"I know, more reason for us to escape back to the future."

Alice laughed.

"Anyway," Haiku said. "There I was, sitting on a sofa on the island of Maui occupying another person's body. It was TOTALLY different from the time I tripped after participating in that art film."

Art film? You mean porno movie, Alice thought. Lucy, the renegade sex-bot had outted Haiku on that back in the future but Alice didn't dare say it out loud.

"The night after working on the film I hopped forward nine days in time," Haiku said. "But this thing that YOU do, tripping through other dimension into other lives is beyond fucked up."

"Welcome to my universe," Alice said.

"I'll be honest, with all my discipline and training in the Imperial Space Navy and the IIW, I still flipped out. Fortunately, only my so called stupid boyfriend witnessed my breakdown. In a few hours I got a hold of myself."

"What about Val?" Alice asked. "How did you find him?"

"Four months down the line a neighbor tells me about some crazy Korean guy who dyed his skin blue like Krishna the Indian God. He lived homeless on the beach in a place called Paukukalo. I raced down. Long story short I found Val." Haiku sat quiet slowly spinning her bottle of beer on the bar top.

"Mavis, really," Alice said softly. "Give me the long version."

"Another shot," Haiku said to the bartender. "One for the little miss too."

"I don't like hard liquor," Alice said as she watched the female bartender pour the shots.

"You're not suppose to like it," Haiku said as she lifted the shot to her mouth.

Reluctantly, Alice did too.

Together they knocked back the shots. Haiku grimaced, Alice coughed and gagged but kept the shot down. Haiku continued her tale.

"I drove my ex-boyfriend's suvy ground vehicle —"

"His what?" Alice asked in a strained voice still reacting to the vodka shot.

"Suvy ... a big ass inefficient combustion, polluting, monster of a vehicle. Why would someone need such a big useless car on the tiny island of Maui is beyond me."

"You mean S-U-V," Alice said. "Stands for 'sports utility vehicle."

"Whatever," Haiku said with a wave of her hand. She was well on her way to being drunk. Alice's head was swimming a bit too. "As I'm driving to Paukukalo, I'm thinking it gotta be the Valentine Surrogate. I expected to find him freaked out and on the fritz or something. The jump fucked with my head, who knows what it did to his bio circuitry or whatever he uses for a brain. It took me less then an hour to find him. A guy with blue skin living on the stony beaches of Paukukalo can't hide from the locals. The first person I talked to told me exactly where—"

"Hey babe," said a guy who pulled up to the bar next to Haiku. He wore dress slacks and a white dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up and tie pulled loose. Clearly a local business drone.

"Did he just call me babe?" Haiku asked Alice looking away from the guy.

Alice nodded.

"I really don't want to waste the energy confronting this asshole," Haiku said still not looking at the guy. "Tell him to go away, Alice."

"Don't be like that, babe," the guy said. I like your looks. You part Indian like in a cowboys and Indians?"

"Oh my god," Alice said totally aghast. "Dude, go away." Alice had seen Lieutenant Haiku in action, the woman was dangerous.

The idiot kept talking, "I gotta say, you are one fine looking Indian girl."

The bartender, a slim redhead came over and said, "Dillon, the term is Native American and stop pestering her. She came here to have a drink with her friend not be harassed by you."

"She's Hawaiian," Alice said

"Do yourself a BIG favor and go away, Dillon," Haiku said still not making eye contact with the dude.

Dillon laughed. "Hawaiian? Cool. Wanna lay me babe?"

In a blur, Haiku had the left side of the guy's face pressed down on the bar by his hair and his right arm pinned behind him at an unnatural angle.

Two men at a table nearby stood up, they were dressed the same as Dillon. Even though she didn't have any fighting skills to speak of, Alice stood and went into what she hoped was a convincing karate stance.

"Cole, Marvin!" the bartender yelled. "Not another step or you can find another hang out!"

"Any closer and Dillon here gets a dislocated arm and broken nose," Haiku said to Dillon's friends. She pulled on Dillon's hair to lift his face away from the bar. "One hard slam and there goes the nose."

"Okay! Okay! Okay!" Dillon chanted. "Dudes! Sit the fuck down!"

His friends sat back down. Haiku let Dillon go."

"I think I'm in love," he said as he walked back to his friends rubbing his arm.

"Idiot," the bartender said as she poured fresh vodka shots for Haiku and Alice. "On the house. You gals in the military?"

"Imperial Space Navy," Haiku said as she knocked back her free shot.

The bartender frowned then went to the other end of the bar to help some customers.

Lacking the stomach to knock back another shot, Alice sipped at her vodka.

"What was that bullshit stance you took?" Haiku asked.

"Just that ... bullshit," Alice said. "I know shit about fighting."

"Better learn girly," Haiku said. "Liners like us can wind up in straaaaaange places."

"What happened with Val?" Alice asked.

"I found him sitting in the living room of an old Japanese lady. She was serving him sweet iced tea and showing him photo albums of her cats. Val called me by name when he saw me standing at the screen door. He had adapted to this world just fine, much better than me in fact. The locals gave him clothes and sugary drinks. He lived on the beach most the time. He would wonder into Wailuku town every now and then to tap some free YIFY.

"Does he need to sleep?" Alice asked.

"He takes sporadic little naps no more then couple of hours at a time."

"The locals didn't freak out about his blue skin?" Alice asked.

"They thought it weird but took it in stride. Even in the future, people from Maui embraced the bizarre. Anyway, I took him home."

Haiku went quiet. Alice rolled her eyes. "AND?" she asked.

"And what?" Haiku asked innocently.

"Mavis! The dude is a sex-bot! Did you guys do it?"

"Everyday," Haiku said and went quiet again.

Trying not to lose her patients, Alice asked as delicately as possible, "Mavis, what happened?"

"I'm addicted to that fucker is what happened," Haiku said. "I can hardly think when he's not around. I go into rages thinking of him sleeping with other women, which is stupid because the guy is a robot made to fuck. I worry about him all the time. He's my only link to my old world and I NEED him to keep me sane." Tears were running down her cheeks. She looked at Alice with a retched mournful expression. "It's super fucking CLEAR that he doesn't need ME." Haiku wiped at her face and regained some composure. "I know that it's those pheromones he puts out. His model came with a warning label about over exposure."

"Sounds like good old fashion love sickness to me," Alice said.

Haiku laughed. "I've read warning labels about that too."

"How's the girl's night out?" Britt asked in Alice's ear.

"Britt's back," Alice said.

Haiku put her phone to her ear.

"Alice is attracting attention from the Imperial Corporation," Britt said.

"It's the book," Haiku said. "They helped her publish. They're interested in Liners. They've been watcher her long before the book came out."

"Its more than that," Britt said. "They detected a power signature coming from her hotel room."

Haiku rolled her eyes. "I told you to lay low."

"It's not ME," Britt said sounding offended. "It's Alice's mood-suit."

"The mood-suit?" Haiku asked.

"Like Britt it followed me through. I had it on remember?" Alice said. "But it's off and hanging in my closet."

"That kind of technology is never off," Haiku said. "We better go get it and clear out."

"I'll call Uber," Britt said.

********

They raced away in an Uber cab away from the Braddock Hotel into the heart of the San Francisco night. The mood-suit was tucked away in a hastily packed gym bag resting on Alice's lap. According to Britt, they had beat the Imperial people by only one minute.

"What would they have done if they had found the suit?" Alice asked.

"Don't know," Haiku said. "You were already on their radar. This has probably got them thinking real hard. Any one following us?" that question was aimed at Britt.

"Britt says all clear," Alice said.

"Can't they trace the mood-suit signal to where ever we are going?" Alice asked worried.

Britt said, "The thing has dampers built in its skin-suit and stealth-suit circuitry. I compelled it to use them."

"Turn here, go up three blocks drop us there," Haiku said to the cabbie.

"Where are we going?" Alice asked.

"My place," Haiku said.

"Aren't they watching you too?"

"No reason too. I'm just some Maui girl working a shitty dead end job."

They pulled up to a modest Victorian duplex and piled out.

"This is nice," Alice said as they entered Haiku's home. The place was airy with white walls, hardwood floors, tasteful area rugs and lots of plants. A fat tabby cat trotted out to meet them. Haiku bent and picked up the cat.