Big Dirk Allen and the Tiny Blonde III

"Affirmative," the AI answered. "Sending rescue team now. Are the Doopherilians still a threat?"

Dirk lay collapsed on top of the control panel. His heart pounded and he couldn't catch his breath. He didn't have the energy to pleasure Tina one more time. He almost hoped the Doopherilians would shoot him with their ray gun orbs. At least then he'd have an excuse to lie prone on the ground.

He turned his head slightly to see Tina bending over one of the purple aliens. It, like the others, lay on the floor and stared up at nothing.

"They're no threat," he said. "They're still tripping."

"No, they aren't." Tina looked grave. "They aren't breathing. I think they all overdosed."

"What?" The jolt from the news gave Dirk enough energy to stand up. "They're dead?"

"Shit," Fac-Tel muttered as the ship gently bobbed up and down with the rolling waves. "That's a lot of forms I'll have to fill out."

"Do you think the Doopherilian King will take this to the Universal Council of Supreme Beings?" Tina asked. "Are we in for another biblical flood?"

"Probably not," Fac-Tel said. "We'll most likely do what we did when something similar happened with the Martians."

Dirk tucked his cock back into his jeans and zipped up his fly. "What was that?"

"We'll pay the Doopherilians off with opium," the AI explained. "I mean, that is what Earth is known for, best snack foods and narcotics in the galaxy."

Dirk didn't mean to laugh, but the whole situation was so absurd he couldn't help it. He expected Tina to scold him for laughing at a tragic event, so it was a surprise to hear her light chuckles mix with his low belly laughs. Their eyes met across the room and the laughter grew between them.

Tina got Dirk. She understood him in a way no woman had before. She got his sense of humor, his need to improve the world, his outlook on life. She was the human connection he didn't even know he'd been searching for. And he knew this moment of connection, of shared mirth, was a moment he'd remember for the rest of his life.

But eventually, they both fell silent, stared at the death surrounding them and waited for the rescue boat to come.

The End