All Comments on 'Brotherly Obsession'

Is this Camp in Fairmont NC?

Wasn't sure about it having impregnation in it but apart from that I really enjoyed it

I am so HORNY..

Having quads is a little much, but the sex was great.

Quadruplets really. Why does everyone think getting family pregnant so hot. No way the kids come out healthy, but what ever.

The idea isn't bad. How you wrote it is pretty weird. If they're running a Christian camp, no way they're going to so calmly and matter of factly decide to have unprotected sex as siblings after one hot afternoon.

You didn't explore any of the moral conflict or perversion that would have to be involved for them to succumb to that sort of temptation. You should have had them have an awkward nude afternoon in the cabin and then slowly become more intimate as they both can't stop thinking about the other. If you wanted to be realistic, having them continually deal with everyone around them having sex would wear on their self control. Hearing it, seeing it, seeing signs of it. Eventually they'd cross a line of some sort and then from there they'd cross another and another until they fucked.

Also, the quadruplets was a bad idea.

get tumor

Aren't fraternal twins look-alike? If so, it would be hard for them to go anywhere. And quads?? Your premise is good, and the grammar/editing is good to, so keep writing. Everything gets better with age.

XYZ