Carmen & Alyssa: An Afternoon Snack

"Hey," Alyssa interrupted Carmen's thoughts by caressing her face, "what are you thinking about? You get quiet when you think."

Carmen smiled and then tensed up, nervous about what she was about to say.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Alyssa noticed Carmen's body language had suddenly changed. She shifted and sat her head up on her left arm, now slightly above Carmen.

"Alyssa," Carmen paused before proceeding, "did you mean what you said to me last night?"

Alyssa gave a confused look. "Did I mean what?"

Carmen tried to find the courage to ask her question, just like she found it last night when she told Alyssa about her feelings. "Before you left my apartment, you told me you loved me. Did you mean that?"

Alyssa's heart started beating so fast, she was sure Carmen could hear it thumping through her chest. She had confessed to Carmen at lunch that she left her apartment in the middle of the night instead of that morning. She still didn't think Carmen was awake when she whispered the words in her ear.

Alyssa's non-response made Carmen even more nervous, so she tried to fill the awkward silence with an explanation. "I thought— I thought I was dreaming at first. But when you told me at lunch what time you left, I figured..." her sentence trailed off. Alyssa still didn't say anything. "Alyssa, I didn't mean to put you on the spot." Carmen wanted to bury her face in a black hole. "Forget I ever said anything." Carmen felt so humiliated; she thought she would start crying that moment.

"You know, when I saw you earlier today," Alyssa finally spoke. "There was this brief moment when I couldn't breathe." Alyssa stared off into space as she described the scene. "You were sitting at the table, not really paying attention at first. But then you looked up, and smiled. Your hair blew in the wind, and your skin was glowing." Alyssa laughed, "It was like this cliché scene out of movie."

Carmen smiled, her embarrassment waning.

"That exact moment, it felt like someone punched me in the gut and I couldn't breathe. You were so beautiful." Alyssa looked at Carmen. "You are beautiful."

"Alyssa, you don't have to—"

"I meant it," Alyssa said with certainty in her voice. "I was trying to convince myself all morning that I didn't but the moment I saw you, I knew I meant it. It's just that," Alyssa paused. She felt more and more vulnerable, and it made her uncomfortable. When she looked into Carmen's eyes, though, they told her she was in a safe place. "I've felt this way about someone before, Carmen. Felt like I couldn't breathe. It started out as something good, but turned into something horrible and I've been able to avoid that feeling for a while. Feeling this way about you now scares the hell out of me."

Carmen was staring into Alyssa's eyes. She knew it took a lot for Alyssa to say those words. Carmen stroked Alyssa's cheek, moving some of her long, dark brown hair out her face. "I love you, Alyssa. You don't need to be afraid because the way I feel about you is never going to change."

Alyssa leaned down and kissed Carmen, pulling her body closer as they embraced. "I love you too," she whispered.

That was all that needed to be said. That was all that mattered.