Chords that Bind Ch. 12

James' studio was eclectic. The attic space was dominated by his grand piano. The refinished wood floors were somewhat creaky, and were dotted with large area rugs that had medieval patterns. An old loveseat sat in the far end, next to shelves lined with CDs and vinyl records. Adjacent the improvised sitting area was James' recording equipment. On a desk of glass and stainless steel was a sleek Mac Pro, several portable hard drives, and expensive looking equipment flanked by large studio monitors. In the two dormer windows James had fitted individual-sized window seats. The one closest to the piano was Cecilia's favorite perch.

As the Fantasie ended, Cecilia looked at the time. She should leave the attic soon before Clara or Abraham got home. She didn't want to answer any awkward questions about why she was in there.

Little did she know, Abraham had come home early. Abraham had noticed Cecilia's withdrawn behavior. When he arrived home earlier than expected, he took the opportunity to check on Cecilia.

The townhouse was quiet, although he could smell the aroma of tonight's dinner. He thought to find Cecilia in the kitchen. When that failed he looked in the den. After peeking into her empty bedroom, Abraham was concerned. He made himself check the other rooms before he grew alarmed.

Abe shouldn't have been surprised to find Cecilia in James' studio. Cecilia's tiny form was folded on the window seat of one of the house's dormer windows. It would have been easy to miss her. Abraham was briefly relieved. He took his promise to keep Cecilia safe seriously. However, one glance told him that Cecilia was not coping well. Abe didn't want Cecilia to feel like she was being spied on, so he withdrew quietly. He and Clara needed to do something.

That night the three of them enjoyed the delicious meal that Cecilia prepared. (She was becoming quite the cook.) Clara noticed Cecilia's long silences and slow smiles too. After they finished a re-aired episode of Top Gear, Cecilia excused herself and bid them goodnight. When he was sure Cecilia was out of earshot, he turned to Clara, who was snuggled next to him on the plush sofa. Her hair was damp from her shower, and her short robe did nothing to hide her dancer's form.

"Clara, have you noticed anything about Cecilia's behavior? She doesn't seem right. I'm concerned."

Clara nodded, unusually grave, "Yes. I don't it's healthy at all. She's becoming reclusive almost. It was better before James left. But now..."

Abe caught her unspoken suggestion. Cecilia missed James. He thought the same thing, but there was nothing he could do about it. "We need to get her out of the house. She's alone all day."

"I always invite her to come with me. I don't want to force her into anything she doesn't want to do."

"She's not in the best place to determine what's in her best interest."

"I know. But what do we do?"

Abe shrugged. "Maybe we need to make sure she gets out more. We can set an example: introduce her to some friends; take her to see more of London on the weekends... That's the best we can do I'm afraid."

Clara leaned in closer to Abe. His concern for Cecilia's well-being was genuine and it made Clara love him even more. "Okay. We're just going to have to do our best."

***

Cecilia was naked and kneeling at James feet as he practiced. It was getting harder to practice because she kept nuzzling his legs and interrupting his foot's movements on the sustain pedal. He would spank her for that soon: after he finished practising. She was making him incredibly hard. He would see to that soon too. He didn't finish though. In between movements he gave up, and covered the ivory keys.

He looked down and pretended to be stern and disappointed. "Didn't I tell you to be good down there? You got in the way of the sustain pedal. I made 13 mistakes because you were misbehaving." Cecilia hung her head. He couldn't wait anymore. "Across my lap Cecilia. That's 13 spanks you're due. Be good and count them."

She did. Then he started spanking her bare bottom with his palm. Cecilia counted. Her tiny voice was clear as a tinkling bell as he punished her cheeks. "Please Sir, may I have another?"

"Sir? Sir!"

James started. The attendant caught him daydreaming and startled him. "Sir? May I offer you a drink?"

James closed his gaping mouth and gathered his wits. The attendant was carrying a tray of champagne flutes. "Thank you. Yes." James took the flute and the attendant left him in peace. He stared out the window and sipped the bubbly. He sighed and wished it were something stronger.

The view outside his window was beautiful. He was somewhere between Vienna and the German boarder on his way to Berlin. His first set of engagements had been successful, and the next stop was a two-week stay in Berlin to play with the Berlin Philharmonicker. He was particularly excited to guest conduct a Prokafiev symphony. Natasha would be meeting him there to perform the Rachmaninoff cello sonata as well. She would be travelling and performing with him on his tour until they reached their final joint engagement in Tokyo.

But first he had a seven-hour train ride to get there. It was more scenic to take the train, but the solitude left James with lots of time to think. Well, he wasn't thinking. He was fantasizing about Cecilia. At least he was far enough away that he couldn't possibly act on his desires. Now that seizing Cecilia was an impossibility, he could feel how much of a toll his tightly reigned control was taking on him emotionally. He was lonely. He had been lonely, but somehow Cecilia's addition to the household made him more aware of it. The distance was diluting his guilt, and he remembered what had driven him to make such poor decisions in the first place. It was time to free himself of his self-imposed bachelorhood. He wanted a partner. Clara and Abe were wonderful friends, but he needed his own relationship.

***

Clara was being considerate. Again. This was the third time this week Clara had invited her out. This time it was for cocktails with some of the other dancers in the company. Cecilia sighed. Clara came home from rehearsal looking radiant and refreshed, as if she hadn't spent the last six hours demanding physical perfection from her body. She cheerily told Cecilia to get dressed and come out for drinks.

Cecilia had been spending most of her days in James' Oxford sweatshirt and yoga pants. Her curly hair was knotted and frizzy. She hadn't seen any point in cleaning up when she spent most of her day alone. Now she stared at the wardrobe and struggled to find something to wear.

"Abraham is working late so I thought we'd have a ladies' night," Clara came into Cecilia's bedroom wrapped in a fluffy towel. She pulled a plum cocktail dress out of the wardrobe and flung it onto the bed. "You haven't worn that one yet. Go on, it's time to get out of the house. You've been cooped up too much." Cecilia didn't have time to respond as Clara sashayed out of her room to continue getting ready.

This was the last thing Cecilia wanted to do, but she couldn't bear to let Clara be disappointed. She showered and tamed her unruly mane of curls. The purple halter was tight in all the right places and Cecilia felt self-conscious in such a revealing dress. She was never allowed to wear anything like this growing up and hadn't had the nerve to try once she left her parents' house.

Once she finished getting herself presentable, Clara ran in wearing a cranberry mini dress. She grabbed Cecilia's wrist and dragged her out into the London night. Clara's energy was infectious and Cecilia found herself smiling as Clara brought her up to speed on the inner workings of the Royal ballet. They were meeting up with a few other up-and-coming dancers in the company.

It was a quick cab ride to the swanky cocktail lounge that the other ballerinas had chosen as their first stop. Once out among people, Cecilia retreated behind a fixed smile. She didn't know how to interact with these beautiful creatures. They all held themselves with inhuman grace. The ballerinas ordered strong martinis and cocktails; clearly, they were out to burn off some steam.

Clara hoped that a cocktail or two would be enough to help Cecilia relax. She was aware of the good face Cecilia was putting on the outing. Cecilia had demurred every invitation to get out of the house so far, and so today Clara had been more assertive than was her wont. Now that Cecilia was out of the house, Clara had every intention of getting Cecilia to enjoy herself.

"Cecilia, let me introduce you to everyone. This is Gabrielle." Clara motioned to a striking girl with blue eyes and raven hair. "This is Jennifer." A tiny ginger inclined her head.

"Meet Alicia, and Sophie." These dancers were exactly the same height, but the similarities ended there. Alicia was dark and had fierce, proud features, while Sophie's porcelain complexion and almond-shaped eyes couldn't have been more different.

"And this is Mackenzie." A long-limbed brunette with a pixie cut winked in acknowledgement.

The angelic faces of Clara's fellow ballerinas smiled easily. Clara decided to continue with the assertive direction. "Two Sapphire gimlets please," she said to the boy taking the order, "and give the other one to Cecilia."

Cecilia tried to decline the drink when the server handed her the lime-coloured martini, but Clara cut off her objection. "Cheers Cecilia, we're so happy you came out with us tonight!" The other girls clinked their glasses. Clara was moving up in the company. That much was clear to the other dancers, and so they took their cues from Clara.

"Do tell me where you found that dress Cecilia. It's so becoming on you. Not that I have the curves to pull it off..." Mackenzie asked. The feminine chatter went on from there.

Cecilia became less and less guarded as the night went on. Clara was secretly pleased with herself. By the time she was on her second martini, Cecilia was laughing at scandalous stories the dancers had begun sharing, all trying to outdo each other. The unspoken competition ended with the girls laughing so hard tears ran down their cheeks, and more than one had to retouch their mascara before hopping to the next bar...

The dancer named Gabrielle was very conversant. "You'll have to come work out with us sometime Cecilia. It's so much fun. Not class of course, but swimming or yoga. Besides, if you're going to keep up with us when we go out, you'll need to build up your endurance."

"I'm not sure... I'm not very in-shape."

"Nonsense. Come with us tomorrow," Gabrielle prodded. "Clara will bring you. Right Clara?"

Clara nodded enthusiastically. This was going well.

Gabrielle tossed her raven hair back. Her blue eyes were seductive and her small mouth made the most perfect smile. "See? It's all sorted."

Cecilia was feeling the pressure to acquiesce. "Sure. Tomorrow then."

Cecilia was not used to so much alcohol, but it felt good to feel her inhibitions lower. She did look good tonight. The British ballerinas were tall and willowy, but they barely had any curves. Cecilia felt out of place with her petite Latina build, but they all seemed to envy her in that regard. The second bar they went to was a regular hangout for the dancers. The barkeep poured them all shots of Sambuca in between drinks. Cecilia was feeling pleasantly buzzed and faintly dizzy. Clara kept a keen eye out for Cecilia and saw that it was time to get her some water. Soon after, the rest of their coterie was ready to call it a night. "We do have class and workouts tomorrow," they chided themselves, loathe to leave, but mindful of their positions.

On the walk home Cecilia was more than a little unsteady. Clara debated hailing a cab, but Cecilia was laughing and chatting animatedly. It seemed the G&T's combined with the Sambuca did their job and made Cecilia far less reserved. Clara was somewhat concerned. She wasn't sure how much Cecilia usually drank.

Cecilia didn't seem to mind at all. She was laughing, most certainly a bit blotto. She clung to Clara's arm and giggled at her wobbly ankles. Clara was happy to see such a carefree attitude in Cecilia, even if it was alcohol-induced.

Suddenly, Cecilia seemed serious. "What do you think James is doing right now?"

The question came from out of the blue, and Clara didn't know how to respond. "Well, I don't know. It's rather late." It was only half past eleven, but James wasn't one for raucous partying.

"He's probably practising." Cecilia said matter-of-factly. "Maybe with one of his girlfriends."

"Who?"

"Those women he plays with. The one plays piano and she's pretty. But the blonde, the cello player, she's gorgeous. I bet he's with one of them right now." Cecilia had affected a rather poor London accent. Clara bit her lip to keep from laughing, but didn't know what to say to that either. She knew James rehearsed with other musicians from time to time, but he had never been involved with any of his musical partners. "I wasn't aware James was seeing anyone." Clara tried to keep her voice as even as possible. She opened Pandora's box when she tried to set Cecilia up with Sebastian. Her promise not to meddle meant she couldn't do anything to alleviate Cecilia's jealousy or suspicions.

"Maybe not. But the blonde one probably wishes otherwise..." Cecilia's new accent was awful, and Clara was exerting some serious effort not to laugh.

Just then, Cecilia's heel caught in a crack in the pavement. Clara grabbed her arm tightly to keep her from falling. "Watch out!" Then she did start laughing.

"Oh! Good catch Clara! If I were less clumsy you could be my dance partner." Cecilia did a terrible approximation of a pirouette and started laughing too. Clara decided they definitely needed to take a cab home.

***

Cecilia was slow to wake the next morning. Someone shook her. "Wake up! Come on Cecilia. No time to waste."

Cecilia rolled over. "No, no, no. Up! Let's go."

Clara pulled the covers off Cecilia, and she curled up tightly in a ball. "Mmmm... No, stop..."

"None of that now. You said you'd come and do yoga with me and the rest of the girls last night."

"No I didn't."

"Yes, you did. Now come on! You'll make me late."

Clara was glad Cecilia had agreed to the invitation, and wasn't about to let the opportunity to get Cecilia out of the house go to waste. She threw some yoga gear onto Cecilia's bed. Cecilia tried to get up. The clock on her bed said 6:00 am. She slumped back into bed. It was too early for this.

Clara flicked the light on and blinded Cecilia. "Okay, okay. I'm getting up."

"That's right. You promised Gabrielle. I have a mat you can borrow. Grab a water bottle. The studio's a ten minute walk, you can wake up on the way."

Cecilia was hung-over. The last thing she wanted was to go do a yoga class with a bunch of perfect ballerinas, but Clara still wasn't taking no for an answer. It was kind of irritating, her bright cheerfulness, but Cecilia found even at this ungodly hour, that she couldn't hold it against Clara.

Clara urged Cecilia to drink as much water as possible on the brisk walk to the studio. Cecilia begrudgingly listened to Clara, and found her fuzzy-headedness started to fade.

Cecilia hadn't known what she was signing up for when she agreed to take a yoga class with the corps of the Royal Ballet. Sweat was pouring off her body in less than 10 minutes, and the instructor quietly modified some of the more intricate poses for her. Cecilia was out of breath and embarrassed by the end of the hour and half class. Her body protested when it was time to come out of savasana.

Clara tossed her a towel. "You did really well. Was that your first class? I didn't expect you'd keep up with us."

"Then why did you invite me?"

"That's the point: you'll get stronger."

"It's not my first class. I took a few in college, but I haven't been in a very long time, and I never advanced very far."

The ballerina that invited her to come in the first place, Gabrielle, shook her head. "You could have fooled me. You are so flexible already. I'm glad you came today! I was afraid we scared you off with how much we drank last night."

Sophie answered, "Well, no more alcohol in the system now! A little vinyasa is the best morning hangover cure I know."

*****

"Unless it's a wake-up call from that husband of yours" Gabrielle lifted her eyebrows suggestively and looked over at Clara, who smiled and blushed. "Well, good point. Vinyasa is the second best hangover cure. But you'll all have to settle for yoga. Abe is mine."

"Come on Cecilia, let's get a green smoothie." Gabrielle said. "You'll need something for recovery after last night and this morning." And with that, Cecilia followed her new friends out of the yoga studio.