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All Comments on 'Co Worker and Neighbor Convert My Girl'

by Shadow_chaser

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  • 2 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousover 9 years ago

You might want to have someone proofread your work before you submit it. It has a decent plot... but the grammar and structure of the story seemed jerky and a bit frantic. It wasn't a bad story, but I think it could have been written a lot tighter, and posibly long enough to make it 2-3 chapters without adding any more "plot" to the story. This isn't your first submission, and the other one i just read has the same issues, so I'm going to call this a constructive 1 star.

AnonymousAnonymousover 9 years ago
You don't have to write

Seriously, you don't have to write. At all. Keep reading for a while.

Anonymous
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userShadow_chaser@Shadow_chaser
12 Stories
62 Followers
Hi everyone. I'm Gary, from NC. I love to read and write erotic stories! I love to share my fantasies and realities with like- minded, horny people! I live in a constant state of arousal! I've been posting my fantasies however am in the process of re-writing them into stories ...