by mpqm1968
unbelievable and unrealistic seems she would have found a friend to live with instead of moving. as is it was totally rushed and not very interesting in any way.
I'd like to see where this story goes and how it develops, and definitely what kind of creative imagery writing about sex you come up with.
Great lead up to what would be a great story.
2 women & 2 men in the house could lead to much adventure.
Needs another few chapters
The concept has some potential; but it wasn't realized in this submission.
what the fuck has this got to do with incest there was no incest what so ever what an asshole
This was a great start to what promises to be a wonderful story of sexy adventures. I started of hating it, but ended loving it.
Nookiehunter
i liked this a lot.. a pilot, a bit of a tease, but a great start. im not usually a series fan, but finishing out this plotline is a great idea.
That was one of the best stories that I have read in a long time. Congratulations I cant wait for the next part please post soon.
great story, want much more!!!
also, would love to see a pic of girl that inspired such a hot tale!!
You've been mentioned on the New Story Review Thread in the Author's Hangout Forum on Lit's Bulletin Board
This story has an excellent build up and leaves plenty of directions that the story can now go. It would be a crime to not develop the story into an excellent series of senarios where the characters can inter-react. I look forward to the next instalment.
this story was very hot, its what i like to read, please continue it, maybe have Mandy walk in and see him jerking off, and they do the mutual masturbateing thing? That storie was so Hot,,, Please keep it going.
We are pleased to inform you that your pilot has been approved.
You HAVE to continue this story!!! It was hot!! Can't wait to read the next episode.