All Comments on 'Confused and Horny'

I like the idea i really do i want to see a part 2. Don't stop writing but please spell check and perhaps an editor.

Keep going!

But you could definitely use an editor/proof-reader to help before you publish.

NOT being mean - just honest.

Keep writing!

This attempt-at-a-story was so pathetic that I could only give it a "1"!

spell checking (whether in British English or American English) would help immensely

also checking whether the words used, such as cardinality, bought, son, tots, image, et al, actually make sense in the places they appear (as I read the sotry it seems to me that the first is unknowable, the second should not be there, the third is meant to be so, the fourth is meant to be tits, the fifth is meant to be imagine)

a final grammar check might also help tighten this story up

A good start but it seems English isn't your primary language so I suggest working a little more on that.

"Her tots"

Yummy

Bad writing style.

Please get an editor?

"He handed me the box and he watched as I opened it and pulled out a beautiful red dress. "Wow, daddy!" I ran to him and hugged him. He responded in earnest and pressed against me. His solidness moulding with my soft curves. "It's lovely. Thank you."

He'd handed her the box how far did she have "run" to hug him? A foot? An inch? Please have your stories make sense. I didn't enjoy this at all and decided it wasn't worth the read. Your writing style gives away your age and if I am not mistaken, English is not your first language.

"He pressed his large clock against me and lubricated it with my live juices before lavishly stoking my neglected cloth with it." This had me laughing so hard. I mean really you must have gotten yourself so worked up thinking about what you were writing that you couldn't write. Live juices? Clock? LMAO

You need an editor to fix word choice, grammar, spelling, etc. your story had promise, but the end fell flat.

I liked the story, I hope there is a second part. But I have to agree with some of the other comments about the spelling.

Omg i can't stop laughing especially when he used his Clock to tuck her! Dude you are a top notch comedian Leep up the God work!

very bad

You got to spell check your spell checker... it does not like cuss words.

Good start , how about a part 2. Hopefully she's pregnant.

Great comedy...I think...

This is screaming for another chapter.

I have never seen such a terrible use of words in a story until I tried to wade through this story. Spellchecker definitely could not make up for the totally improper usage of words such as residential and cardinality. This story is an Editor's worse nightmare.

What a load of utter made up rubbish. Terrible spelling very bad word use . I guess this was written by someone from a non english speaking nation. No offece but please learn the launguage your trying to write in before you write anouther sentence.

Gave it one star! Let's see how fast we can tank this story!

What were you thinking? Don't you have a dictionary? Where the hell did you pull words from that made no sense in the sentences you typed?

Please please please before you ever post another story get an Editor. Read your story out loud to yourself. Have a friend or five read it out loud.

Your sentences most of the time don't make sense and it causes the readers to stumble making the story very uninteresting.

That was just awful I mean truly awful.

Watch your spelling....other than that, made me horny as hell

Horrid. Could not get past the spelling and grammar. I have seen better writing by a 10 year old.

this was good!