Courtesan Ch. 03

He inserted his finger in my pussy first and then pushed it in my anus. I grunted as he added another digit.

"Has your husband ever fucked your ass?"

"Oh heaven no! That's gross."

"If you trust me I'm going to take you into a whole new universe. Do you trust me?" Kurt asked pulling a tube out of his nightstand.

"You're so big. Won't that hurt me?"

"If I hurt you I'll stop. Okay? I want your virgin ass. Will you give it to me?"

"Promise you won't hurt me?"

Kurt didn't answer me but inserted lubricant into my opening with a finger. It didn't feel unpleasant so far. He twisted his fingers and I moaned. It felt like he added yet another finger.

"You're ready Jen."

Before I could realize what was happening, he pushed me to my side and lay beside me. He shifted himself a couple times gaining the right position. Kurt paused to stroke himself as hard as possible and wiped his cock head in my flowing juices. Then... he pushed forward. I felt pressure and a fullness I had never experienced.

"You okay."

"Uh huh."

He backed up and gently moved forward several times. Each thrust pushing deeper and the slight uncomfortable feeling was replaced with pleasurable sensations. Then he seemed to hit some resistance.

"Jen this your sphincter muscle. I want you to squeeze down as I move past. Okay? How are you doing?"

I squeezed like he said and Kurt pushed completely in with one smooth continuous thrust. It felt different but there was no pain.

"I'm in all the way. What are you sensing?"

"Shut up and fuck me!" I replied.

Fuck me he did. I had an intense orgasm but in all honesty I like vaginal sex better. I think it will take time to overcome my apprehension.

"Your ass is mine forever," Kurt said.

We cuddled and he whispered sweet things to me. Kurt had planed to conquer my body and will but he conquered my heart also. I was more in tune with him than any person I ever met including my husband. How could I be so foolish?

"You ready for more?"

I was exhausted but I replied, "I'm all yours remember? What's next?"

I followed his lead as he lifted me up until I straddled him. I knew what he wanted, but this was all completely foreign to me. Kevin and I had only done missionary before. He was hard as steel as I reached under me and positioned his cock at my entrance. Kurt held my waist to steady me, while I began to lower myself. Even though he was huge, there was very little resistance on my part since I was dripping wet with hours of excitement.

"Oh my lord... you feel good!" Kurt groaned.

I was erupting again with multiple orgasms. I loved this position. He pumped me faster and I gave up trying to keep up. I placed my hands on his muscled chest to steady myself during his rapid onslaught. After what seemed to be like the longest ride of my life, I felt him tense up as he grabbed my butt. I knew what was coming; I could feel it.

"Don't close your eyes," I breathed. "Look at me when you—"

"Fuck, FUCK!"

My words were interrupted by Kurt's groan, as he filled me up with jet loads of sperm. I was drowning in a sea of blue as I gazed in his eyes and he gave me access into his soul. He'd had kept his eyes open the whole time.

I collapsed on him in post coital exhaustion: my body and mind both

drained

"Jen, please believe me when I say that was the most fantastic sex I ever had."

I giggled and peered up at him. "I believe you. I was there too... remember?"

We lay there in silence, while I stared at my body through the ceiling mirror, basking in the moment.

Finally, I asked him, "What happens now?"

"Well..."—Kurt played with my hair—"Give me a few more minutes to recover and we'll see."

"No, I mean what happens with us now that you've got what you worked so hard for?"

"I don't follow. Explain."

"Kurt, you told me today that you only seek out relationships with 'no strings attached,' which means I'm in a real pickle. I haven't learned to separate sex and emotions like you have."

"Meaning?"

"Meaning, the only reason I let this happen is because I've developed feelings for you... real feelings, deepl feelings."

"Jen, I am not a robot. I have feelings for you also... but I told you from the beginning what this was about."

"Why couldn't you keep your mouth shut?" I thought.

"I... I don't know what to say," Kurt replied. "I do care for you, Jen. You're the most amazing woman I've ever met—but you're married."

"So, I'm supposed to have the most mind-blowing sex of my life with this guy that's pulled out all the stops to seduce me and then... just go back to my husband like nothing ever happened?"

He stared at me in silence for what seemed like forever. The fact that he was speechless didn't bode well with me. I knew he had some feelings for me because of his hesitation to bring me to the castle party.

"Answer my question," I said. "What exactly am I to you? Where do you envision this going?"

"It's complicated. Can't we discuss this later? The night is still young." He squeezed my breast.

"Really? That's your answer? More sex? Talk to me. I deserve to know if I am more than just a fuck to you."

He got out of bed and looked down at my nakedness. "What do you want to hear from me? That I love you? That I want you to leave your husband and marry me?"

"What I want is the fucking truth!"

"Jennifer, I was never deceptive with what I wanted. Don't be naïve. I really care for you and it's been incredible getting to know you. These last few hours have been some of the best sex of my life. I envision us knowing each other personally and professionally for a very long time. Only time will tell."

"Is that all you care about?" I said in outrage. "Sex and money? There's more to life than sex!"

"Jennifer, there can't be anything more between us even if I wanted it to be. Right now I'm not capable of more."

"So that's all I am to you then, a fuck?"

"It sounds so tawdry when you put it that way.You will never be just a fuck."

Stupid, stupid me. I felt so indescribably foolish.

"Thanks for the truth," I bitterly stated. "If all I am is a fuck, then you better get on with it"—I got out of bed—"Alone."

"Wait!"

No. I couldn't wait. I couldn't even look at him. If I did I'd run back and jump in his arms.

"Jennifer!"

The door slammed behind me as I shamelessly headed back to my room, completely in the nude. I didn't care, though. This was exactly what I needed: I needed to hate him.

What the hell was I thinking?

How could I ever endanger my marriage and family like that? The only conclusion I could make was that I was temporarily insane while in the presence of Kurt Krause. I had to get away from him. I had to leave this beautiful place. It was turning my life into a living nightmare.

-oOo-

I woke up disoriented and confused as I looked around me and panicked. Last night had not been a dream. The dried semen on my pubes bore testimony of my infidelity. I couldn't comprehend why I had let myself cross so many lines. Lines I never thought possible. As I sat up, propped on a pillow, I glanced at the nightstand clock; it was ten o'clock in the morning. Seven hours of sleep was not enough, but right now all I wanted was coffee. I phoned the service operator and waited for someone to pick up.

"Yes, Frau Sheffield?" said a lady on the other end. "May I help you?"

"Could I get some coffee with two sugars and a splash of cream?"

"Certainly. Do you need anything else?"

I replied, "No just coffee... unless you can provide absolution."

"Pardon me. What is that?"

"Never mind. Just the coffee please."

"As you wish. We will be there shortly."

-oOo-

I kept wondering if Kurt would pay me a visit or have someone "summon me" on his behalf.

I can't believe I basically told him I was falling in love with him.

Disturbingly enough, my confession of feeling for Kurt felt more like a betrayal to my husband than the actual sex. I had emotionally betrayed Kevin by letting myself to develop feelings for Kurt. The guilt was all consuming.

As I got up to grab a robe from the shower, I heard three knocks. My heart began to accelerate as I opened the door and... saw the maid standing there with a tray.

Sigh. False alarm. As if he'd actually come and see me after what happened last night.

The maid was carrying a tray with coffee and pastries. She was the same one I'd seen in the hallway last night. I guess there was no sense in pretending modesty as my robe fell open taking the tray.

My life had changed so much in just a week. I wasn't just in a foreign land that spoke a foreign language, but my own thinking had become foreign to me. Those hours spent in Kurt's bedroom were sure to cost me dearly. I could still feel him inside of me, and it made me ache in my heart. I was a different woman this morning than I was yesterday: completely conflicted and fallen from grace.

I sipped my coffee and evaluated myself. My reflection in the mirror looked the same. I knew I couldn't see an "A" branded on my forehead, but it was certainly etched on my heart: adulterer. I knew despite my self loathing, that if Kurt desired me I would give him little or no resistance. Suddenly a chilling thought washed over me. Did he really possess me?

The outfit I chose was tennis-wear. I quickly dressed and braided my hair into a ponytail. When I looked in the mirror I appeared normal but I knew I was now something else.

Ready to face the world, I stepped out of my room and headed down the stairs. As I rounded the corner to the study, I suddenly bumped into Kurt. The unintentional collision caused an even bigger impact when I realized who was standing beside him.

"Kevin! What are you doing here?" I was in shock.

My husband looked distressed as he stepped forward. "Jennifer, I made a big mistake."

I was speechless. All I could do was look down in shame.

"I flew all night to come and save my marriage.Tell me I'm not too late."

Kurt tried to diffuse things as he said, "Kevin, she loves y—"

"Shut up!" Kevin shouted. "This is between my wife and I. You've done enough!"

"Honey, calm down. We can talk about this," I pleaded.

Kurt raised his hands in mock surrender as he backed out of the room, avoiding the inevitable confrontation. I was left to deal with my angry husband on my own.

"Tell me what happened last night," Kevin asked with a mixture of sorrow and anger.

"Not here Kevin. I'll tell you in private."

"I don't want the details. Just tell me the truth. Did you fuck him?"

I didn't answer and stared at the floor.

"Well? Answer me! Did you fuck him?"

Tears flowed and I shamefully answered, "Yes."

"How could you do this to me? To us?"

I had no convincing excuse. The truth was that I felt horrible.

"Kevin, I am so sorry."

"Bullshit! You're not sorry! Why lie? You called me two days ago to inform me you were going to whore yourself out to this notorious playboy. When I called back to stop you, it went immediately to voicemail. I called your folks and asked them to watch the kids telling them I was going out of the country on a last-minute business trip... so here I am."

"Kevin, I love you. I love no other. I don't know what came over me. What happened between Kurt and me was just sex and nothing more." I knew that was a lie.

"So, did you enjoy yourself?"

"Kevin! Don't ask that. I told you I'm sorry."

"I guess that's it then, right? We're done? Ten years of marriage tossed away like yesterday's garbage."

"Honey, don't say that." I tried to reach for his arm, which only seemed to repel him as he backed away from me as if I was contagious with a disgusting disease.

"I'm gonna get sole custody of the kids. You're unfit to be their mother, you cheap whore!"

Oh no he didn't...

"Don't you dare call me that!" I screamed in rage to mask my hurt. "I may have made my fair share of mistakes but I am not a whore! Nor am I an unfit mother!"

"You fucked him!"

"You told me to, you hypocritical asshole!"

"Oh, so I'm the bad guy now?"

"Yes! Yes, you are! Both of you! If anything I've become a victim of your tag-team brainwashing and mind fuckery!"

"Mind fuckery? I know I was wrong to send you on this trip but it was you spreading your legs like a whore."

"You've both manipulated me!" I broke down in tears.

My hands were trembling as adrenaline coursed through my veins. It was fight or flight, and I was choosing to fight. I was defending my dignity as a woman, as a wife, as an individual.

"I didn't force you to hop on his cock and go for a ride!"

"You didn't fight for me, either! You were complacent, Kevin. That alone was your most grievous crime. You didn't tell me to come home, Instead, you were all too happy to give me a hall-pass to sleep with another man."

"That wasn't my intent. I trusted you."

You're the last person to point the finger at me and question my morality. If anything, you're the one with the broken moral compass. Face the mirror, darling. You're far from a saint. A real man would never want to share his wife or bargain her as part of a business deal."

He seemed stunned by my words. But I had to speak up for myself. I knew I wasn't entirely free of guilt, but neither was he.

"How could I ever trust you again?" he said. "How long before you'd cheat on me?"

"It's not cheating! When your husband tells you to go stay with another man. Especially a man that openly told you what he intended! Yeah, I know about your talk with Kurt after he saw me on video."

Kevin looked shocked at that and said, "I made a mistake!"

"So did I sweetheart! People make mistakes!"

I watched my husband pace the hall in frustration while I stood there with tears flooding my face.

"Please don't destroy what we spent a decade to build. I love you and I love our family. I'd die without you and my children. How can I prove that I love you and I'm committed to us? What can I do to make this right?"

A few minutes seemed to pass as Kevin thought over his response. He is a very pragmatic man and usually thinks things through.

"I'll do anything to save our marriage. I can't justify what I did. After we went months without intimacy I was vulnerable and should have never agreed to any of this. I should've booked an appointment for therapy right away. I knew we had serious issues."

Finally Kevin shouldered some of the responsibility and confessed, "You're not entirely to blame. I'm your husband, I'm supposed to protect you, not bargain you as part of a business deal."

"Just please give us a chance, Kevin." A painful lump began to form at the back of my throat while I wept uncontrollably. "I'm so scared that you'll never be able to look at me the same again. I'm not sure if I can even face myself after what I've done."

A warm look of compassion washed over my husband's face as he enveloped me in his arms. "Jennifer, you're my whole life. I know I neglected you and I'm sorry for that, truly sorry. I don't know if we're repairable, but if there is a chance, you must leave with me now. I have a cab waiting."

Kevin walked over to Kurt with a manila envelope and said, "Here's your fucking contract. My wife is not for sale at any price. I never should've allowed any of this and guess I'll have to live with that for the rest of my life, but you will never touch her again. Keep your fucking money."

"Actually we have a contract and you will honor it. Jennifer never was part of the deal. Nice seeing you, Kevin. Have a safe flight back."

With that, Kevin took my hand and just as we were about to leave, Kurt called out to me.

"Oh, and Jennifer..."

I stopped and listened but refused to look back.

"I lied."

Kevin looked at me with confusion.

"When you asked me to be honest last night," Kurt continued. "... I lied."

"What is he talking about?" Kevin asked.

"Nothing," I replied. "Let's go, we have a plane to catch."

Epilogue

Back home our relationship was strained, but I tried to be the wife I should have been before this mess. My newfound sexual prowess slowly took effect on Kevin. After two years we were still in counseling but we were also now enjoying an active and frequent love life. I'm not saying that Kevin suddenly transformed into Kurt—no one could, but I was happy.

I found employment with a famous interior designer shortly after I got home. I found it strange how they had contacted me for an interview almost as soon as we arrived home from Germany. Marlena had said that I was highly recommended by an anonymous partner. I'd had my suspicions as to whom that recommendation came from.

Kevin finally made general partner and did so without sacrificing his time with his family. I guess you never appreciate what you have until you almost lose it.

From time to time I still think about Kurt and those last words he said to me before I left. Those two words haunted me every day and I could never tell Kevin about it.

I lied...

Was it truly possible? Could the notorious Kurt Krause really be capable of feeling? Had he fallen in love with me?

These were questions that would go unanswered. I made my decision clear when I left Germany with my husband. I meant it when I told him that I was committed to our marriage and family one hundred percent. I guess Kurt was like a virus that I could never get rid of. He had infected me, and the symptoms of that infection were resting, dormant inside of me... forever.