All Comments on 'Crime & Punishment Pt. 01'

The word is QUIET, not quite. The word, Incredulous, is used way too much in these stories. LW authors need to learn there is more than one way to tell readers when characters are astonished, astounded, amazed, suspicious, hesitant, skeptical, unconvinced… you get the point. An editor was definitely needed for this story.

aways liked this series. just didn't think it was fair or possible that she loses her retirement account during the divorce asset split.

Liked it!

Good start 5*****

Huh. So ‘dark donuts-squared’ = ingrate? I agree. My second time through this RG story and as much as I don’t really care for lawyers, and/or politicians, this is a very good story. Thank you for sharing, RG, looking forward to the next chapter.

5 stars

All the makings of a good story, but in desperate need of an editor. I hope the author finds help.

Well crafted but, although obviously very talented, this author seems to have a veritable obsession with ambitious dominant and amoral women married to weak and subservient men, usually of Irish extraction. OK, this particular worm finally found some balls and turned, but most of his MC's put up with an unbelievable amount of crap from the women, without so much as a whimper. I just wish he would vary it a bit, disappointing..

2nd reading. Even better than the first one. 5* and thanks for sharing.

Well-written story. Best of all, this is the first one I've read on Lit where the author gets the substantive and procedural law mostly correct. (One minor error: a result of 2.2 % by volume blood-alcohol level would have the drinker comatose, probably dead. You meant a .22, still a very high reading.)

So, the mc plays God with another man's life, drives for 30 minutes, listens to a pompous fool talk his wife into cheating on him' and goes home to continue his role as a plastic dildo shaped like a whipped dog. She sits on his face and he asks "what could I do?" Pathetic. How can ANYONE think that this is a good story?

Fucking "Richard Gerald" is one of the best authors on LWs, somewhere in the top 5-10, great writing, great imagination, really tightly woven, hard to put down stories. Kudos to you/him. Many thanks for sharing your mind and your talent for story telling, kept me distracted, interested, taking sides and up a lot later than planned. rk

In this story and in my personal experience it is amazing how easily a woman can corrupt a man or destroy his soul. Excellent story by Mr. Gerald, also kudos to his editors and beta readers. 5 stars the first time and 6 stars the second.

Wow! dark2donut2 paints with a really broad brush in his depiction of RG’s stories. Apparently, RG is a wimp aficionado. Who knew? In his own stories, dark2donut2 writes realistically about real men…always to very high marks. My own experiences with RG’s stories is that he always produces interesting plots with memorable characters. And if you follow Albany politics, you’ll realize that RG likely underestimates the corruption present. This is my second pass through C&P and it’s as fun this time as it was the first time. It’s hard to believe that RG shares his talents freely…and even harder to believe that there are ingrates who fail to recognize the gift.

A story is not a story until it is complete. Till then "nothing to comment on". LP

This is arguably one of the author's best works. My third reading since it came out. Used to work for a Senator's home (state) office as a young man before going to university teaching, and got to work with "fixers" a few times. This reminds me of those days a bit.

You got me! Can’t wait to get into the next installment. Really enjoyed your plot and flow of the story. Certainly a 5*. Thanks!

why do all these wives think they can fuck who they like say "it is just sex " and think hubby should forgive them Cheating slut They get what they deserve NOTHING

I'd agree, RG writes good plots but his inner nature is of metrosexual wimp and he cannot help himself to paint wimps in all his main character straying only on occasion.

One of the things that bothers me even in his good stories (like this chapter) is that he always describes his many characters, in particular women, as ready to jump in bed any time. Just like redneck BTB writers that make their characters drink excessively to make them appear "cool", RG makes his characters "cool" by making them indulge in sex whenever and with whomever. The real people among us know how much inhibition actual real people have and while some are like the characters RG makes most are nowhere close to that.

Another annoying thing is that all his political characters are entirely corrupt and some are even proud of that. That is a cliche he just cannot avoid.

4 stars.

I love this chapter of this story. It ends badly at the last but this chapter is simply brilliant.

As stated before, don't read the rest of the "chapters" in this story. They lead to a massively forced raac from an author who became famous for them. The author has tried to redeem himself in recent sponsored events, but those of us who have been around a while know he is a (person who) Can't Understand Normal Thoughts.

So she spent a whole day fucking him a week after she made partner? She is just a slut.

Will Patrick ever ask how could it mean nothing if she spent a day slutting herself out after she made partner??

Laura is a fool. Her husband is a prosecutor. I actually hung out with a bunch of them for a time. They are like sharks, they will eat anything and everything. If they are good, at heart, they are a great white shark. In the courtroom he is apparently already a great white. Now she has erased his merciful side, the one he wore mostly outside the courtroom.

Stupid for a lawyer and without a clue of what her husband is capable of now that she has obliterated his nice guy side.

Spoiler alert, don't waste your time on this pathetic tale of entitled, amoral slutwife and her poor excuse of a husband. RAAC cucky boys will be masturbating by the end of this...

great story when all the bad guys and cheating wives get screwed instead of fucked. Second or third time and still good.

If he had any sense,he would have asked her not to do it on the Wednesday and left her wondering if he knew,then when she did it dumped her and sued Frank and the firm.When he got shit on in the DA s office he should have walked,he could have got a job any where with his talent.

What a great yarn! It has most of what I love in a Literotica story - sleaze, slime balls, corruption, cuckoldry, deceit, lies, scumbags, whores and sluts. None of the characters are likeable, but I don’t want to read about Mother Theresa, just give me a sordid plot (which is believable) and I will love it. 5 stars.

Fantastic first part, put me in mind of Steinbeck’s Winter of Our Discontent

love this story even the second time

Just ran across your story looking for something to read, wow impressed not only with the story but the style and delivery. Nice to see our little cuck grow some brass ones. Hope he manages to keep them. Looks like another author gets added to my follow list.

On to chapter 2.

Cheers

SAGE

Nice guys finish last? Not this guy, cheaters always wind up paying-sooner or later. Of course he could have confronted his wife that first night and maybe saved the marriage but I guess after listening in that booth he kne she was a lost cause and just a whore. Whore you asked? She wanted the partner position for the money right? That makes her a whore. good story so far

This is just another disgusting RAAC. RG apparently loves writing weak men who are horribly humiliated and then submissively return to the cheating cunt. You get the usual tired plot devices to drive the raac, a medical crisis and a baby. You also get a ridiculous view of how the courts in NY can be manipulated in divorce matters and, of course, you get the "high powered" lawyer wife/slut, a species that rarely exists, and then only because of affirmative action.

Damm he writes great stories but without reading the 2nd part I know its gonna be a RAAC.

One goes to a DINER for DINNER

Lost interest when you had the guy eat up semen. It's a real cuck move. Please delete that part, it would make your story a lot more readable for people who don't share that fetish.

He divorced his wife, but why did he not she their law firm?.

Else you can say about this story, RG got at least three things right; Crooked politicians, lawyers, the wife was, is and stayed a whore even after she made partner. No reason to think that was ever going to change, if it didn't mean anything why throw the marriage to the man she professed to love so much away. Seems it meant something to him, at least in Chapter 1. Signed: BTW

but I stop reading here. OMG so much boring detail. Skipped whole paragraphs looking for the story to start again.

Stupid man. Sold out is honor for nothing!

I agree with the last comment! He would have been better off fucking Frank up physically at the party and bitch slapping her, taken the time in prison, then when he got out, if she hadn't divorced him, divorce her and do another number on Frank!

Too many wimps in these stories and authors that stretch sensibility to create a worthless story!

A good man go bad. Could have burned down his marriage and her lover without becoming less of a man.

The term “loving wife” should be banned! I never in my life have heard a husband say, my loving wife. If I did, I would probably think, How superficial can you get?

Just sayin.

Not to say this isn’t a great story.

Good story enjoyed and expecting good follow thru

Great story and all too true in politics and business.

This a great start to a.story. We have the cheating wife and and we're going to get into the cheating of my Democrats. A dirty politics story. I'm going to like this if a lot of people get burned. Looks like Pat ain't a man to cross.

We’ll see how it goes. But I think this story goes a long way towards illustrating why I so despise, generally speaking, lawyers and politicians. Of course since most politicians start out as lawyers I guess there’s really no need to differentiate. Maybe they will all get a little comeuppance in this story. Now that would be entertaining.

Don't waste your time.

YAWN! Far too long and there is another 3 chapters? 1*

looking forward to the following chapters

Best you go back to reading comic books Cumminginsiderher......

It looks like there are at least 4 chapters in this story. I barely made it thru this one and that was after cutting out nearly a couple of full pages worth. Too much filler crap in it that isn't necessary. Sorry, but I won't be bothering to read any more chapters. Most stories are decent, few are 5's and a few are like this one, a 1.

I remember it gets pointed out later, both in the story, by Bella the counselor, maybe others, and some commenters, that Pat isn't so innocent.

However, he WAS innocent until he got screwed over by his wife and his job. It's even entirely possible that as Steven said, he might have waited till her affair blew over and she "made it up to him," but when his bosses fucked him over too, that was the straw that broke the camel's back.

As has been stated several times, maybe the affair WOULDN'T have blown over since she was still fucking Frank after she got the promotion.

I know you were developing the story, but if it were me, when I overheard the conversation with the ass-wipe and the wife, I'd have come around the corner, grabbed the ass-wipe by the back of the head and slammed his face into the table 8 or 9 times and told them I overheard the conversation! Then told her we were finished!

Of course, that's just me!

Who falsely claims to love her husband while simultaneously deliberately doing the absolute worst thing one spouse can do to the other. Repeatedly.

She loves him? Really?

She never meant to hurt him, but she did the most damaging thing she could do to him.

I do not agree with previous comment.

... The waitress in question is crucial for both the defense's trial win and the husband's revenge.

... some Van Patten stories of Yours were a bit short in character development beyond the lead character. This one is still concise and fast paced but gives more room for relevant traits of the main cast.

... Moreover, we get to know w h y the supporting characters, like the waitress in question or the policeman doing the drug test, act as they do. Thus pivotal turns in the plot do come neither out of the blue sky nor are pure chance. These are crucial details that support the plot line as we learn how Steven and Pat smartly "enable others to help" their respective causes.

You tend to over describe your females. We don't need to know everything about waitresses.

not always legal and moral but sure are non news printable. TK U MLJ LV NV

The rank above Corporal is Sergeant, not "sargent".

Why do you authors like to write your male lead characters as being pussy-assed wimps??? He a trail lawyer, for crying out loud!!! He would be tough as nails. If it had been me who overheard the conversation with his wife and her boss, I'd have come around the corner, grabbed him by his hair at the back of his head, and slammed his face into the table so many times he would have been unrecognizable, then told her not to come home!

Of course, your story, then, would need a different plot and direction!

I liked the story, but thought it was too convoluted. It's probably that I'm used to the short, straight stories. All the people were tough to keep track of. I could follow the jist of the story and enjoyed it.

Now I can give it a score based on my estimation of the writer. There is no score low enough or any word vile enough to sum up my loathing for this writer.

Still five stars. Still love it. Still a favorite.

re:Lawyers

Aside from the one I'm married to and love very much, I hate lawyers. This just adds to the load.

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well this story just confirms there are only bad lawyers

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Well, like they say, 99% of lawyers give the rest of them a bad reputation.

well this story just confirms there are only bad lawyers

Aside from the one I'm married to and love very much, I hate lawyers. This just adds to the load.

Very good writing. A bit bloodless, but then again the husband and wife are lawyers. Ick. Just ick. I don't like it when the woman after being caught is so matter of fact. I sympathize with women climbing the corporate ladder and the pressures they have, but then again, lawyers... Once you learn to lie and cheat the truth for the "greater good", you are already ethically compromised. All my distaste for lawyers aside, this is an excellent story and I look forward to the rest. 5 stars for sure.

But I don't see lawyer wife just rolling over and giving him everything.

And I agree he could have stopped her from cheating, but after hearing her talk I don't know it would have made much difference, it would just delay the inevitable because she had no respect for him.

So good

he had all the time to try to fix things BEFORE she fucked around. of course trusting her afterwards was another matter.

While I agree with KarenE that it would/could shut off the story, but I also feel that Oat should have said something in the restaurant.

While her continuing the affair after getting the promotion is suspect, I DO believe that she loved/loves him and didn't want to sleep with Frank and would have welcomed the opportunity to avoid him.

Second reading. The story was good enough to overlook the typos and misspellings. Being a good story, I don't miss the lack of sexual situations. Cheers!

While I tend to agree with you on simple typos (quiet/quite; principle/principal; capital/capitol), I get more irritated with others (clothes/cloths; loose/los; there/their/they’re), and cannot stand when sentence structure makes things nearly (or actually!) unreadable.

I realize it would have short-circuited the rest of the story, but he should have confronted them right then and there!

Then give her three choices:

Go to Saul and complain about the sexual harassment.

Resign.

Divorce.

I agree.

I can understand “some” character background to help us understand them better, but I tend to skip over when we start getting chapter and verse on every date they had.

I missed the fact that there are more chapters, so I won't be reading any further.

My golden rule on this site;

NEVER read a story about cheating that has more than 1 chapter! Why? Because they always inevitably end up as RAAC garbage.

Therefore, I say; This was well written, but I will read no further!

Capital or capitol?

diner or dinner.

principal or principle.

The story was very interesting and loved the first chapter. Great Start!

you have to be to announce the ending of a story as if your opinion was worth anything. Even if your judgment were correct, revealing the ending is a cheap, brainless move.

in the end he self cucks so dont bother reading 1/5

First, I have to repeat my earlier comment, if she was fucking Stan to get the promotion, why keep fucking him after she got it?

Also, why do all these cheating wives who do it for the money say, "I did it for you/us, Honey?" Like that makes it any better.

He is changing as we watch

I love this Author! You need to be a little more careful with punctuation though. Also, a 'quite' instead of 'quiet'. No big deal. 5 stars!

Now, Laura said: "Why, why, why are you doing this? I am so sorry. I never meant to hurt you."

Seriously Laura? Pat should have been asking, why, why, why did you do this.

Laura said: " You will never get over doing this. I am not asking for myself. I love you."

Well Laura, if this is your idea of showing Pat love, I would hate to see what you could do if you hated him.

5 stars!

5 starrs

'nuff said.

Keep it up

You obviously took great care in writing this story. It is well written and flows well, besides being a good character study.

For a first submission it is brilliant. Excellently crafted storyline. Vivid detail. High quality dialogue. Five stars and an instant favorite of mine. I will be looking for more of your work. Hopefully this series is just the beginning. Bravo!

Partr 2 for "Crime & Punishment has been posted 05-09-14

Well written and very entertaining. Thanks for sharing.

Re-read this fine tale before I go to ch. 2. I hope our hero stays his new path. We'll see...

we have a new player on contract, TK U MLJ LV NV

This is what I call a good start for a good series but after 2 weeks of waiting it seems like this was all you had to give on the subject of these characters. I don't have any personal insight into who you are but as a writer from another site I can honestly say that it's better to strike while the iron is hot with a good in depth story like this than to let it cool off till people can't remember it. You're doing a good job with this but it needs more. If I see a response or something I will make a profile just to correspond with you on the subject.

Good writing.....finish it!

Hey, Dickey, this is pretty good reading. It's been two weeks since Pt. 01 came out. Hope you don't have "writer's block". Anxious to read the exciting following chapters. Cheers!

I understand they are into cuckold and the rest and hate a good story about a straight man who won't stand a cheating wife but this is so unprofessional it will ruin lit. Is that really what the bitches want?

Outstanding story! While I feel it works fine as a stand-alone, I will definitely read the succeeding parts to see where Pat goes, now that his moral character has been broken.

With all due respect to HDK, I don't concur with one of his comments. While I usually agree that we don't need all the history on how a couple got together, in this case the backstory provided two important foundational elements: first, it showed how and why Laura was the controlling partner in the marriage (a point reinforced in the sex scene preceding her first tryst with Frank, as she completely took charge of the sex). Second, by devoting most of the interview to prying out information on Kincade, it showed her easy willingness to use someone (Pat, in this case) for her own purposes. The interview, as such, was very revealing of her character.

In fact, another revealing aspect: by describing the whole interview process as being something of a sham, all wink-wink-nudge-nudge, it helped set the tone for the legal/moral ambiguity of the lawyers later in the tale.

Wow!! Great story. 5 stars. Loved the way he finally "Had all he could take and was done taking it anymore". A reversal of "Hell hath no fury". Can't wait for the continuation / sequel

...YOU are DQS and here we go again!!!

You are talented but egotistical and show nothing less than disdain for your readers who you feel are subhuman and lacking in intelligence - next to you!

I doubt you have any friends, maybe some colleagues who HAVE to deal with you and, of course, those that depend on some sort of monetary or mental encouragement that you deign to show them some support for their loyalty to your insults.

Do us a favour - get out of Lit, no one - NO ONE enjoys having to go back one and two chapters to bring their awareness back to your story so they can enjoy another chapter and then...knowing - you are going to do it again!

Did you think we forgot your insults - NO. Most of us are giving you the benefit of the doubt in hopes or respect that you may have grown up and become a decent human being - I haven't!

..."You were wonderful. I'm really going to miss that. Can we do one more before Wednesday?"

Why knowingly let her cheat and then go postal?

"in my opinion" to your comment LordSlamdawgg, as not many others agree with it.

GEEZ ! how long between postings?