All Comments on 'Domination Pt. 01'

I'm a realist. If someone was in coma, Waking up is very disorienting and there are tubes everywhere, including one to evacuate your bladder. Also, ERs are very busy and open areas. I know, it's fantasy, but distracting to me. Wake up, take a day or to recover and yes, then discover the power.

But I don't want to be discouraging. Please, continue and develop the story.

... it doesn't work too well, even as a fantasy. Everything is way too quick, no build-up, no real explanation... just a bit juvenile.

This story seems to be about self gratification, I find i boring. It is a greedy fantasy where everything goes the way HE wants, no difficulty = no conflict = no story.

There is nothing about relationships, nothing about caring for another, just me Me ME!

It is less exciting than reading the newspaper.

This story is just a string of tired plot points and conventions from a hundred previous stories.

Please let my suck.

Not Upton the standard of your newer did but still think you should continue this and maybe rewrite.