Driving Home for Christmas

"Mum she's 32, I'm 45; what interest could she possibly have in me? We're friends, that's all."

"Well call it wishful thinking if you like, but I see more than that. I'm telling you, you could do a lot worse."

On the drive back home Percy was bright as usual. "I like your mum, she's so natural and she's worried about you."

I started to smile.

"What?" asked Percy

"It's nothing."

"It must be something, that's the first time I've seen you smile since I got here."

"It's just mum matchmaking. I told her you were out of my league."

"And how do you know that?"

"What?"

"You don't know what league you're in until you start playing the game, and you my friend, haven't begun to play the game yet."

When we got home we started work on the house she tidied and dusted while I went round with the vacuum cleaner. By the time evening came upon us, it was back to the state that Penny would have found acceptable. We sat on the Sofa. Percy's head was on my shoulder and we both had a glass of wine. She snuggled up to me.

"That was a lovely and very productive day. This place looks more like a home now. There is only one problem. --It looks like her home doesn't it."

I looked around at the photos, ornaments and nick knacks. All Penny's, nothing of mine on show at all there were ornaments I'd bought her for her collection. There were photographs of the two of us, some of the children, but nothing that showed that I lived there.

"I don't see you with any of this. I see you as a man with books on the shelf not ornaments. What about all these cushions?"

I pulled one out from behind me. "I've always hated them. Unnecessary clutter as far as I'm concerned. I think Penny thought that you couldn't have too many cushions,"

"Well it's your house now. It's time to make your mark on it. Sweep away the old life and start again. We'll start tomorrow after you've seen the doctor."

"I don't need to see the doctor, there's nothing wrong with me."

"Yes there is, and you are going to see him tomorrow."

'You'll be lucky' I thought as I imagined Percy doing battle with the doctor's receptionist. She stood up, taking my hand and indicating that she wanted me to get up.

"Come on." she said."I'm tired; it's time to turn in."

That night as I spooned into her my hand fell down onto her naked breast. She put her own hand on top of it and pushed it hard against her. Little Drew was not responding, but I loved just holding her.

"Percy."I whispered. "My mum was right; you're much too feminine to be called Percy. Can I call you Seph or Sephie? She turned her head towards me.

"Are you saying you want to be my daddy?"

"No of course not I just think Sephie suits you better."

"As long as you hold me like this, you can call me anything you like."

I knew what she meant there was tremendous comfort in holding her. I even felt a certain stirring down below, something I hadn't felt since Penny went back to Romania.

I was up and about early again the next morning. I left Sephie, in bed. Just because I couldn't sleep past 4.30 am there was no need for her to be up. Something she'd said the previous night was eating at me. She was right, this is my damned house, I thought, and I'm going to take it back. I went out to the garage and found a box and some newspaper. The first thing to go was Penny's collection of frog ornaments. I wrapped each one in newspaper and put it into the box. With everyone there was a memory, and some brought tears to my eyes, but I carried on. I'd finished the frog collection and started on the framed photographs when I heard her behind me.

"We only cleaned this place yesterday, what are you doing?"

"I'm boxing up her life, to make room for mine."

"That sounds like a good idea, but don't you think you should have put some clothes on first."

I looked down at myself and realised that I was stark naked. "Oops" was all I had to say.

Sephie laughed at me. I looked at the clock and was surprised to find it was already 8:20 am.

"I'll go up and have a shower and get dressed" I said.

After a longer than normal shower, and a quick shave, I got dressed and went back downstairs. I was just in time to hear one side of a telephone conversation.

"I don't care what the rules are. He needs to see a doctor and he needs it today." I knew she'd have this sort of trouble.

"OK so who makes the rules, put me through to them. -- To hell with the practice manager, let me speak to the senior partner." She put her hand over the phone.

"Breakfast is on the table." she said. She returned to her call."OK, he can talk to me now or be talking to the chairman of the Primary Healthcare Trust before lunch. Ask him which it is to be?" There was a long pause before she spoke again. "If it was physical I'd have taken him to the hospital." Another pause "Look Mr Styles needs to see a doctor today. If you insist on prevaricating I will hold you personally responsible for anything that happens to him. -- Yes 12 noon will do fine thank you."

She came to the table and sat down.

"Was all that strictly necessary?" I asked.

"I think it was. You need some medication. The sooner you get started on it the better. I can help you with most things but I can't prescribe medicine."

At the doctor's surgery, I felt like a little boy having mummy come in to talk to the doctor. As it happened it was a good job I did because Sephie told him a lot more than I would have. He seemed very interested in the out of body feeling. He told me I was suffering from shock and depression and thanked Seph for bringing me in. He wanted to talk to her about her battlefield nursing, but time constraints meant that we had to leave. The doctor gave me a prescription and advised me join a gym and see a counsellor. I told him that was no problem as the college provided both.

When I took my certificate in to work, Bob took one look at me and said "Thank god your back."

"I'm not coming back for a month Bob. The doctor signed me off."

"If it means I get the real you back, you can take another month."

"I hope one will be enough."

I went home to finish boxing up ornaments and picture frames. It was partway through the second day before I had all traces of Penny boxed up and in the garage. I'd even moved out the glass fronted display cabinet, she used to display her Clarice Cliff tea set. I sat down at my desk and wrote a letter asking her what she wanted to do with it all.

It took about three days for the medication to start kicking in and I started to feel more connected to real life again. The daily workouts at the gym were actually making me feel better and giving me an appetite. Sephie came with me to the gym and little Drew started to get excited when I watched her on the rowing machine. The house was looking somewhat bare after my purge and I was considering what to do with it. I decided to completely redecorate and buy new furniture. Out would go the flowery fabric sofa and chairs and in would come a leather chesterfield and a recliner. With the furniture ordered we started on the painting. It was while we were painting the living room that the second phone call came.

I knew who it was as soon as the operator asked for my name. "I have a call for you," the operator said in a very thick Romanian accent. Penny came on almost immediately.

"Oh Drew, Drew how could you?" I thought this had something to do with clearing out her belongings.

"How could I what?"

"I know you were upset, but I never thought you'd be this vindictive."

"Penny, it would help if I knew what the hell you are talking about."

"It's Ion. He's been sacked. They said it was because his relationship with me was not professional."

"Why would that have anything to do with me? You told me you'd given him his marching orders."

"Well we might have had dinner together once or twice."

"And I'll bet that was followed by breakfast the following day."

"Aren't I entitled to some male company? After all you made it clear you don't want me any more."

"Are you surprised? I gave you the chance to explain and all we got was lies, with you trying to convince everyone that it was my fault. That I'd got it all wrong."

"Even so, you didn't have to report Ion to my bosses. Now I've got a crabby old woman for an interpreter And Ion can't get another job, he thinks he's been black listed."

"Well I am sorry." I said, my voice dripping with Irony. "It couldn't happen to a nicer bloke."

Sephie took the phone from my hand.

"Now listen to me you selfish bitch. Drew has a lot more to worry about than whether your toy boy has a job or not. What's the problem? I'm sure you'll keep him in the manner to which he wants to become accustomed."

"You swan off to Romania leaving a broken man behind you, and all you can worry about is your lover's job. Now go back to riding your boyfriend and leave us alone. (pause) Don't give me any of that. I was there. I know what happened. --Nice tits by the way."

She put the phone down.

"Selfish Cow" she said.

We stood there looking at one another without saying a word. Her eyes softened as she looked at me, I could feel a smile spreading across my face. We moved closer and as we did the laughter started. We fell into each other's arms, still laughing.

"Did you just tell my ex-wife, she has nice tits?"

"I did." she giggled "I should have said for your age." we giggled some more.

"Did you mean it?"

"Yeah, of course. They didn't sag much and they're bigger than mine."

"I'm not so sure about that, I think I need to look at yours to compare them."

She pulled off her paint daubed tee shirt, reached behind and unclipped her bra. She brought her arms forward and let the bra fall to the floor. I just stood looking at her with my mouth open.

"Well." she said "what do you think."

"Maybe a little smaller, but absolutely gorgeous."

I moved my hands up to cup them and as I did I brushed my thumbs across her nipples. They immediately started to stiffen. She moved her hands up my arms and suddenly we were locked in a passionate embrace. I felt her pulling on my tee shirt so I leaned forward to allow her to pull it off. We tugged at each other's waistbands and in no time we were both naked rolling around on the dustsheets, picking up all the spots of paint we'd dripped on them. Our tongues danced the tonsil tango as we lay side by side in a tangle of arms and legs. I rolled her onto her back and used my mouth to re-examine her breasts. She took my head in her hands and pulled it hard to her breast.

"Oh yes, Drew. Make love to me."

I climbed between her legs, happy to note that little Drew was standing to attention. As I entered her she let out a huge sigh. As I slowly moved in and out of her she pulled my head down to kiss me. I could feel her fingers moving deftly across my back. I found my self driven to push down harder into her with every stroke. She arched her back and her hands came down to my arse pulling me harder into her. Her loud grunts gave away the fact that she was having an orgasm. I paused for a while buried deep inside her as she came down from the ecstasy. I rolled over bringing her over on top of me. I pulled her arse cheeks apart slipping my finger in to stroke her rosebud anus. The result was renewed thrusting.

"Oh my god, Drew. Oh my god, Oh my god."

My finger entered her anus and her shouts became incomprehensible as the thrusts became harder and the grip got tighter. I'd tried to hold back as long as I could but as her body started to shake I felt my juice pumping into her. She lay on top of me as she came down from her orgasm. I could feel the moisture on her back as I moved my fingers gently across it. She lifted her head and kissed me.

"I've said it before and I'll say it again. That woman must be crazy."

"But she does have nice tits."

She laughed at me. "Yes she does, but I'm glad you're playing with mine."

Up to that point I'd been unaware that I was stroking the side of her breasts. I moved my hands up and stroked her shoulders and massaged her neck.

"Do you know? I could lie like this forever."

"It's alright for you; you haven't got the lid of the paint tin under your arse."

"I rolled over on top of her and she ran her hands down over my arse. She found the lid and pulled it off.

"Now you'll have a big grey circle on your bum. --Perhaps we ought to go up and have a shower. I'll clean the paint off you."

It turned out we both had paint on us but it came off fairly easily. I joked about buying some red paint and coating her body with it so that I could roll her along the wall. It quickly degenerated into game of chase me which somehow ended up with us lying naked on the bed. We didn't get much more painting done that day. For the first time, since before Christmas, I felt happy.

She stayed with me for a month before she had to leave to go back to her unit in Catterick. I didn't know whether to laugh or be offended when she told me how she'd secured her leave. She told them she needed compassionate leave to go home and nurse her father back to health.

"Why did you do that? I don't mean why did you tell them that. I mean why did you come? A girl like you must have hundreds of young men queuing up to be with you. Why did you waste your time on a boring old fart who can't even hold on to the woman he had?"

"First of all will you stop calling yourself old. You are not old. Second I came here because I wanted to. I like you Drew, I really do. I thought I'd made that abundantly clear. Yes there are other men, there is even one particular man, but he's in the army too and we don't get to see a lot of each other. While we are a apart we have a sort of "Don't ask, Don't tell" agreement. I know that makes me sound promiscuous, but I'm not. Apart from Clifford, you are the only man I've slept with in two years. If I thought..."

She didn't seem to be able to finish what she wanted to say.

"If you thought what?" I asked

"It doesn't matter. What I'm trying to say is that I'm finding it very hard to leave, but I have to go. We are still friends and I want to keep in touch. We can get together from time to time. I really care for you Drew, but I have to go."

After she left we tried to Skype each other every night and whenever possible one of us would travel to be with the other. I was eating properly and still using the college gym, and soon put some of the weight back. This time it was in all the right places. When David and Phoebe came home for the summer break they found a new home and a new dad. When I met Phoebe at the station she gave me a double take.

"Wow Dad, you look so fit. What happened to you?"

"I stopped feeling sorry for myself and started on building a new life."

"Well whatever you are doing, you should keep it up. I've never seen you looking so good."

"Just wait till you see the house."

She filled me in on the happenings at university. We got home and as I took her through the front door her jaw dropped.

"This is amazing." she went into the living room then the dining room.

"It's all so ... so ... I don't know, so you."

She looked along the shelves which once held ornaments. "All your favourite books I see, and I like the pictures. It's all so different, sort of minimal. Not my taste maybe but anyone who knows you would know this is your house."

"You'll be glad to know, your room is exactly how you left it."

David was far less effusive. He walked into the living room and said, "Whatever happened to your hatred of decorating?"

"I had a bit of help."

"You must have. Who ever it was did a better job of motivating you than mum ever did."

"Strangely enough your mother provided a lot of the motivation."

"Yeah, well perhaps the less said about that the better, eh Dad? --Still, it looks good, sort of up market bachelor pad."

The two of them spent some time catching up during dinner. It wasn't till we sat drinking coffee that things began to open up. I could tell that Phoebe had something on her mind so I asked what it was.

"I've been speaking to mum."

"Well of course you have, she's your mother you should be talking to her."

"She's getting married Dad, at the end of July. She's asked us to go out for the wedding."

"I'm not going." said David.

"Well I can't say I'm surprised, but it's not my business anymore. I didn't expect an invite but I don't want to be there and see her make a fool of herself."

"Well I've told her that I can't see why she is in such a hurry. I mean she can't be pregnant can she."

I almost sprayed my coffee over the pair of them.

"I somehow doubt it's your mother who's in a hurry."

"Well if it's her husband he'll be the first man I've ever met who's in a hurry to get married." Phoebe said.

"I guess it's Ion Damanescu that she is marrying and he'll definitely be in a hurry."

"But why Dad I don't understand."

"He's in a hurry for an entry visa. Lovely as she is, it's not your mother he wants. If they've been married for a year, he will get automatic right of entry to the UK and can apply for permanent residency. It breaks my heart to see her falling for it, we were warned often enough."

"You still love her don't you Daddy. I know she loves you. Can't you just hop on plane, go out there and bring her back?"

"How can you ask that? You were here when she sat and told a pack of lies. She tried to pretend it was all a misunderstanding and that I'd overreacted. She told me she'd kicked him out, now she's marrying him. How can you expect me to trust her again?"

"She thinks you've cast her off. After all you did divorce her. She doesn't want to be left alone that's all. I know that if she thought there was a chance she'd be back here like a shot."

"Well if she doesn't want to be alone, she's marrying the wrong bloke." I looked at David. "You're being very quiet over there, don't you have anything to say about it."

"Not really, no. If she wants to marry him then more fool her. Any man who can seduce a happily married woman has no principles. They're welcome to each other. I'm not going to be there to see it."

"She's still your mother David. I don't want to see you cutting yourself off from her."

"Well if you say she is Dad, I've got to believe it. All I can say is that she hasn't been acting like my mother this last year."

They both went out that night and left me to my own devices which meant calling Sephie. I can't say that the news about Penny didn't disappoint, but it was not my problem anymore. In mid July Phoebe set off for Bucharest. When she got back, she told me the wedding went off without a hitch, but was reluctant to say anymore. I got the impression that something had happened but she wasn't saying anything.

Someone was shaking my leg. Gary Glitter was on the radio singing about his Rock and Roll Christmas.

"Come on, wake up sleepy head. I need your help."

"What? Where are we?"

"We are just coming up to the Dartford Crossing. I need you to get some cash together for the toll."

I delved into my pockets and pulled out a handful of loose change.

"Dartford already? That was quick."

"It certainly was not, the traffic has been awful. It feels like it's taken ages to get this far. You've been asleep that's why it seems to have been quick."

I counted out the money and made sure we had exactly the right money for the toll. We moved onto the Queen Elizabeth Bridge and she looked at me.

"I don't know what you were dreaming about but it seemed like fun, at one time I'm sure you were laughing."

"It was not so much of a dream, more of a memory."

"Well I'm glad there are some happy memories."

She wound down the window as we approached the barrier. I passed her the cash; she dropped it in the trough and started to wind the window up.