All Comments on 'Drugged and Raped Ch. 02'

After an uncertain ch1 this is shaping up nicely. The victim's actions were belieavable and the half baked blackmail plan collapsed quick enough under police questioning. So far so good. But better off not pressing charges though? Maybe I'll chalk that up to him still being in shock but I doubt cops would ever advise against prosecuting unless they think that they can't get a comviction and with their evidence and testimony it looks like it would be a slam-dunk. Perhaps he'll come to his senses after he's slept on it. The wife is clearly mental and a danger to society, even without the question of rape, unlawful restraint, blackmail and potential fraud. As for the kids, well other kids talk. They're bound to find out eventually why mommy and daddy divorced / mommy's in jail / the nuthouse. Apologies in advance for my cynicism but I've read so many dodgy plots forcing a reconcilliation that I'm hoping the cop neighbours' advice isn't merely a means to keep the plot on the rails and ensure the R.A.A.C. ending.

Not bad so far. Keen to see where this will go.

Keep it up.

Not as fun as the first chapter.

"cuck in a closet"

Chuck should file charges. She should get convicted for this and that would be enough to gain custody of his kids.

For what she did to him, I can't see a R.A.A.C. working.

The idea of not prosecuting in order to avoid the media circus that WOULD happen is not without merit, sensationalism is everything to the media.

But how to balance protecting them from the media with protecting them and himself from her?

Not press charges? If he does, he wouldn't need to worry about losing custody or paying alimony. She'd be in jail. For a long time. His 'cop' buddies are giving him some very poor advice.

I'm done, not reading anymore. Not only has the technical quality of the writing somehow gotten even worse(every character talks like a robot that doesn't quite understand how humans speak to each other), but you just spent an entire page having other characters relay events in great detail, instead of actually writing out the events themselves. Let me guess, you're probably saving that for the wife's flashback scene so you can pad the story out that much more?

I'm sorry, I have no patience for this kind of thing. If you're going to tell a story, tell a story. Having characters stand there and say "This happened, then that happened, then she said this, then we said this, then they did this..." is not how you tell a story.

2 stars, if only because the chapter was mercifully short so I only wasted about 5 minutes of my time.

divorce would seem to be a given here.

with what she has done to him, she should not be given the boys or profit from this.

staying with her would be absurd and dangerous for chuck and maybe even for the boys. the bitch needs to go to jail and get mental help

I am making every effort to let this play out for a few chapters before forming an opinion. This is an alternate world, or a different dimension. Things are different there, although it is similar to earth. I will give it some time.

You really need to leave your house once in a while. No LEO worth their salt would discourage a rape victim from pursuing charges against the perpetrator. Also, no judge would give Darcy custody! You obviously aren't educated about real world issues, do us all a favor and research before writing.

They should still have a forensic specialist make a mold of his teeth. The paper is fine for a quick check to try to break their story, but his wife's lawyer can claim that the paper doesn't have HIS bite marks. Ah, his saliva, good idea, though he still could have dripped his saliva af

Good idea checking his pubes. If he had sex Darcy's pubes would be mixed in.

Letting Darcy fuck Chuck might have actually bolstered their rape charge if Chuck hadn't taken the action he did!

He CAN'T be blaming his "Daddy body" for this! That might be some lame justification for a "typical" affair, but not the abuse and perfidy that she did!

He should definitely FILE charges. He can use the threat of prosecution to get a VERY favorable divorce settlement. If she fights it, then damn the embarrassment, go for it with guns blazing.

Besides everything else, Bev having sex with a tied-up Darcy kind of puts the lie to any "rape" charges.

Show vs tell. As others have said, we should have SEEN the scene where Mark and Terri walked in on Darcy and Bev.

You claim to be writing this from a “real world” point of view. Are you delusional? There isn’t a radical judge in the world that would award kids, house and money to someone who committed a minimum of three felonies against their spouse. Kids being sent to the in laws doesn’t prove compassion but rather helps to prove a premeditated conspiracy. I can’t imagine a police officer in the world that would recommend against him agreeing to charges against her. In fact, I doubt it would be his choice. Your assumptions in this plot have been made to make whatever point you are going after, which is indeed your prerogative, but please do not continue to have us believe this is more real-to-life writing than other stories here.

In our reality, women as deranged and dangerous as Bev would be doing time easily with as much evidence as was gathered.

I still found the first chapter a fun read. Bev is a seriously evil, if not very bright, bitch that was fun to read about.

you are doing good keep it going

Next chapter, how about writing more than 15 sentences.

With evidence like this they would have to arrest. No questions. No options. Police do not get to decide in something this cut and dried. Police and these officers are liable now if he orshe go crazy and kill one another or the kids. She especially is unbalanced.

I like howmyou write. Looking forward to next parts.

'media circus' it would hurt BEV most. he'd get laughed at and sympathy, so would his kids. that's it. and people forget. the next shooting, proxy war, election. people would forget pretty fast. it'd have to be a small town.

he has no other options except to blackmail her back. too risky. bev has nothing to lose now. gotta burn the bitch....legally. it's his only option. she did this to him and the kids, he's just PROTECTING himself and the kids. sure, she SORTA removed the kids....but she physically...emotionally...mentally...financially is actively trying to HURT their FATHER. that's a HUGE blow towards her kids. she tried to turn their father figure and supporter into nothing more than a husk.

she's not a damsel in distress, she's a calculated rapist and blackmailer. she'd sacrifice her children's relationship with a strong male role model to do it. he'll need therapy and time to heal. rape is serious. forget betrayal.

Looking forward to part 3!

And gets a tox screen done. Why involve the neighbors? Even if they're cops? Go to the real cops and have his wife arrested thereby assuring him a great split of the assets in the divorce. He'll get custody and everything if she's sitting in jail. Unbelievably bad ending.

Bev should be drawn and quartered. One thought is that the only semen they will find is his, and there is really no evidence connecting his wife to his rape because the attack on his anus could have been done by anyone.

Going to neighbor/cops would be same as calling police-they have no choice but to file report/charges, to do otherwise would risk their jobs and pensions. Jesus pls keep it real as possible.

Also, this would maximize chuck's chances for a favorable divorce, as she is likely to get jail time and no divorce judge is going to split assets favorably for a criminal who assaulted and imprisoned her husband.

finish writing the story and then post it in it's entirety? Unless you are getting ad revenue there is no reason to dick around with a serial.

An extremely interesting plot line. Have read a LOT of stories on Lit, and this plot line was one of the most intriguing!! Am anxiously awaiting the finale.

No police officer would advise against charging the criminal pair, and would arrest them whether the victim wanted that done or not. Bogus plot.

Hoping to read another installment to this story. I think that shit like this can and does happen in real life. Hopefully he proceeds with a divorce with a compassionate judge and gets on with his life, and she gets her deserved penance at the wrath of the judge.

Yes the police interaction and actions might be too much of a stretch for the officers careers but, it is a good fictional story plot. I hope that you include more of the story in each section before it seems like the movie serials back in the day (Flash Gordon) where you get 5 minutes of action then you have to wait until next week!

There's the evidence on the video. Plus I don't think it's going to take much to get Darcy to roll over on Bev.

I know we often complain about endings being rushed, but SIXTEEN more chapters when we already have the perps nailed in chapter 2?

Writer's words: "I have tried to come up with a real world scenario with a real world ending"...Really? In the real word he wouldn't have gone directly to the police and present charges? 1*

It's hard to imagine that given the status of the story thus far that you can prolong the outcome for that much longer unless, you spoon feed us so little in each installment that it becomes annoying. You have the start of a very entertaining story let it build more quickly and give it more meat in each chapter. ***** so far - keep up the good writing.

I really enjoyed this chapter! Can’t wait to see the next one! I was so worried

It was going to be a duck hold from your description at the start. Not a fan!

didn't expect that , but saying that id refer to the story about no shame taken, another where a guy is raped I think by women, though I don't think they penetrated him in that one(thankfully) or the one its what kind of a party I think its called, Where the wife and her friends set him up to be restrained and raped in view of a group of people. The one where he didn't get his wife to leave, he fries them all. This is how id like to see if go and would hope if this happened to me id react. Raping a guy is possible, though much less common I grant you, doesn't change the fact and they both should FRY just like a male rapist should. A college friend of mine, female was raped and I saw how that played out after I found her.. that's a part of my life that I wouldn't ever wish happen to anyone. I hope the author FRIES them both.

you need the practice.

Thanks for the effort.

If your story arc doesn't improve, you are going to get hammered, It will be justified. Sorry

No different than picking up a book letting the background develop and then Wham with something unexpected.

I agree with stillaonewomanm, starting like a book. I still like it so far.

When did a couple of chapters a day turn into a couple of chapters a week. Some of us can read more that 1 chapter a day. Patience is in short supply among the devoted LW category. More please, before you loose your core group of readers. Remember, it was YOU who promised 2 a day. Thanks for the effort so far.

Corvette John in Rainy Seattle

The cop said that a radical judge might give the kids to his bitch wife! Bullshit. If she is charged with a felony and found guilt, the wife will not get the kids no matter how radical the judge us.

You concluded the story in Chapter 01! Now you're scribbling nine more?

Obviously, you have some major league short term memory loss!

Thanks for sharing.

I think Mark and Teri gave Chuck bad advice. First, there should be written proof of his visit to the ER. He needs to turn over all the evidence to his divorce lawyer and the lawyer protecting his invention patent. Yes, he and Jeff and Jon may be harmed when this case becomes public, but it will only get worse if Bev and Darcy regain control. I hate cutting down an interesting story, but judging by the length of this story, things are sure to get worse for Chuck before it concludes.

You don’t use the video as evidence of their crime. You use it only to challenge their testimony. That is always admissible. It proves that they are lying.

by the cops. The wife would get serious prison time just on the drug and kidnapping charge. Darcy's turned, and the wife would plead. It would be better for the husband and the boys UNDER THE CIRCUMSTANCES if she did 10 years or so, at least. Conspicuously bad understanding of the legal system and bad advice. So, poor plotting.

Given the crimes perpetrated, no LEO would talk the victim out of filing charges.

Wife goes to jail, he gets the kids.

Great idea just terrible reactions. How many names of rape victims do read in the paper or press? Exactly, none. The courts to go great lengths to keep the names of rape victims anonymous. Darcy would fold like a house of cards. He's going to be VERY rich soon. MOVE! Private schools for kids. Gated communities. BIG home with pool. Face lift? Personal trainer? The world is soon going to be your oyster. MOVE!

Far away, change name, send her to jail for a long time.

2**, because you did NO research on the law, and your two cops gave shitty advice

Why didn't he call his lawyer from the cops house .. That way he would have known his choices better ..

is bullshit and wrecks the plot. They can't sweep major felonies under the rug. Moreover, the idea that the H and the boys would be destroyed is horseshit. The bitch goes up the river, and he gets full custody. Not remotely credible. Just fucking stupid.

An interesting plot and set of events as consequences.

Criticism of the author for not researching the law is a fair point. Though bear in mind this is a fictional story and there is writers provocative.

Good read and will interesting to read the next chapters to see how this story unfolds.

It's a shame that the good idea for this story is completely broken due to the amateurish design! The crime committed by his wife and her lover puts them behind bars for a very long time! There is no question that he receives custody of his children! And, everyone has the right to know what a weak criminal whore his wife is! His children too!

Just the first few under mine. Seems the story's glaring weakness is apparent to all. Attempted murder, kidnapping, false imprisonment, rape and sexual assault as a start do nothing to harm the husband or his kids. It does guarantee that he gets custody, and financial freedom from his ex wife because she's going to prison for a couple of decades and wouldn't be able to fight the proceedings from jail. As officers of the law, Mark and Terri have an obligation to report this multiple offence.

!!!!

Mark and Terri will need to file a report. Once Chuck goes to the hospital and requests a rape test the hospital is required to call the police. If Mark and Terri don't file a report it could cost them their jobs. So there is no hiding what happened. To think otherwise is ridiculous.

What's to think about??!! HAVE HER ARRESTED!!!

Wow, this is terribly unbelievable. I know you said this wouldn't be a BTB, but the wife is looking at jail time, and the cops are looking at losing their careers. The police and the hospital staff have a Duty to Inform in cases of rape. The wife would get no custody because she'd be in jail. The cops are giving terrible advice.

Major legal issues here. The detectives rwiped and eturned Bev's phone instead of retaining ut as evidence. By doing so they broke the law. They also gave Chuck bad advice when they told him not to file charges, which eould have been hus only protection against the woman who comitted evil abd depraved acts on his person, NTM attempting to destroy his life.

Customary premise butt

This guy was kidnapped drugged by the day right is drugged by the day ray personality sodomized sodomized set up for extortion.

The multiple engineers here require investment of the DA for review the investment of Ada for review is not a voluntary situation we can decide you're not pressed Grecian we can decide you not press charges.

Either this man is a cuckold fool or a stupid the time to deal with these women is now and is forcefully violated as possible outside of physical harm

Going to the hospital was a good thing the rape kit will establish both the drugs and the physical trauma.

Interrogating the 16 year old girl she will crack in an hour both should go to jail.

This is a slam duck case for law enforcement both women have been arrested and booked a rain the following day and remanded to charge.. Bail would probably not have been set

Finally the vision of material recountled because of her crimes.

I'd like the guy's lucky hes not dead.

A good story line will framed but unfortunately you're gonna milk up for solitude and it's gonna be pretty and I'm looking at the salts worthings I'm pretty boring by the end. A good story line will framed but unfortunately you're gonna milk up for solitude and so you're pretty boring by the end

I'm going to read them all and if they turn that well at the end I will eat Crow and apologize.

Ah come on, really? They are worried about a potentially f-cked up Divorce Judge and a bad divorce ruling when they have hard evidence of kidnapping, rape, poisoning and so much more. Granted it would be a last resort, but Bev would be looking at hard time rather than primary custody of the kids and lots of alimony. I don't get it.

Disgusting. Will not continue.

When do the Wizards and vampires show up? I dno what universe your justice system is in, but I dno a place where cops would tell you to ignore a violent crime cause a judge would.. blame you?

She's looking at at least a decade in prison and unless I'm mistaken, they don't have daycares in prison.

I wouldn't critique this so hard if you hadn't made the point of trying to make this more realistic than a BTB story.

plot or idea is good but poorly crafted. obviously BTB and soon

Cops have a duty to report a crime. If they didn't and it came out later that they did they could end up prosecuted.

Holy crap that was some terrible advice handed out by those cops.

Major failure for the cops to sit on this. Author totally lost it.

The problem is that, as police officers, they are REQUIRED to report any crime they have knowledge of or risk losing their badges.

There is a difference between hard to believe and completely implausible.

Your portrayal of a drugged rape victim and the two police officers you believe are involved in the rape is completely implausible.

This and other inconsistencies in the Plot make the whole "Story" fall apart - hard.

On a side note: I find it disturbing (!) and also showing a horrendous lack of tact that you really believe that a rape victim can be in a loving sexual relationship with her tormentor, story or not!

Police would have charged both women immediately. Absolutely no chance of keeping it quiet and mom would be found guilty in record time.

Police are required to report rapes, as are nurses and doctors. This case would be 100% all rape and kidnapping the instant he spoke to his cop neighbors.

Since when as a credit card been cash?

The Police Officers made NO mention of charging Bev with the crimes involving the administration of the drugs, as well as involuntary administering the drugs. That, added to the false imprisonment, attempted fraud, attempted blackmail, Rape, and child endangerment. This would be a slam dunk case in ANY court room, especially considering all the evidence, INCLUDING the drug they used, and pictures.

You would have to be a FOOL to NOT report this as the crime it was. Saying a person would be destroyed is horse crap. Taking this and being a vigilante is NOT advisable in ANY case.