All Comments on 'Flight of the Forbidden'

Look forward to future chapters.

Well done first chapter. Looking forward to the next.

Thanks you guys for the feedback! I just submitted chapter 2 so it should post in the next day or so! Please watch for it and leave more feedback.

Well *I* certainly want to know where this is going. What's the deal with this guy? Where will they fly to? Will they get into trouble? Will he make her squeal with glee?? Be keepin' my eye out for chapter two! :)

Thanks DeathandTaxes! Love all your works too, hope to not dissapoint!

I'm interested in seeing where these characters go.

Two things though. You could use an editor, there's a page in Literotica submission that lists people willing to edit stories. That could take care of a lot of the typos and little things that ruin the flow of the story.

Second thing I had a question on was the age of the characters. She said she worked at a factory leaning each department, and had time to build a spaceship from scrap, but she's only 18?? Did she start working when she was 13?? Add ten years to their ages, and that might have been a bit more believable.

OK, I see chapter 2 is posted already. I'm going to go check that out.

Congrats again.

Yes. ... I see your point about the age but I do actually get into that a bit in chapter 3, (Which I'm still working on) in their society they start career training around 10. I wanted to make them older but I also wanted to start them out pretty innocent. And as for the editing, I agree! I'm always catching things in other writers work yet its so easy to miss stuff In my own, even with multiple spell checks and read throughs. The fact that I'm going back and forth writing on my phone and my computer Isn't helping that! And as far as an editor, I've already been warned against using the lit editors page so I'm going to make an A/N in ch 3 for anyone who is at least interested and sees potential in the story that would be willing to help with edits. Thank you so much for the feedback! I'm all for polite CC :)