All Comments on 'I Can't Believe I'm Doing This'

Yes the Story, and the Concept are good, and the tale flows nicely,

But, and it is a big But, in each and every paragraph there is an error. (in longer paragraphs, two). This detracts severely from the reading enjoyment.

The errors looks like ones that would be made by a speech recognition programme, example . . 2nd last para. "I was far from discussed, I loved it. "

i can see how likely a programme would substitute Discussed for Disgusted.

So even if spoken into a mic, it needs to be read afterwards.

Thanks, and we'll see more soon,

Kilroy.

Amann52-

The story was AWESOME!- Personally, I didn't know this is where someone comes to learn english. They have not a creative thought in their collective heads and get off complaining about form over function.

Please keep writing!

is the Loving Wife??????????????

discussed for disgusted

tong for tongue

waste for waist

You say they exchanged dirty IMs. So, what did they say? Try to get your readers turned on by letting them read what the characters said to each other. This has all the excitement of a TV commercial.

Barb

could have been so much better if you had proof read it first . . . . I really lost interest when he took off her top . . The same one she had already just taken off !!

Also a bit more depth in the erotic detail would have made it far hotter.

we are both married and its wrong but we are both is stable but sexually frustrating relationships. we need to please each other and it happened just like this the first time we fucked

A low life, marriage wrecking, whore, deserving all the hatred usually directed at the homesteading man whore.