All Comments on 'In Which an Elven Servant... Ch. 02'

This is good and I have seen to many story’s left to die just as they get to the good part don’t stop now

Fred

Kept seeing this story over and over from the tags that I search for, kept getting scared off by how many chapters it has. I'm glad I finally started reading it, you've already got me hooked rooting for this elf to show the bitchy succubus who's boss.

Quick note, that you might need to do an editing pass on it. I found three very small mistakes, but otherwise, absolutely the best story I've seen in a long time.

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> Their definitely real, not

They're

> and ready, so it feels the best for him.

I pull

You need an ending quotation mark after "him".

>gorgeous her body is as it glistens."

Delete that ending quotation mark

Not the sort of story I normally read...succubus body amalgam off-putting-but always had a weakness for elves, esp after Lord of the Rings, and Harry Potter...pls there's been a cpl of other superb Santa's elves stories in Lit...

this story drawing me in....rooting for the elf...!

tho at the moment don't have a clue why Master summoned her

I finished this chapter before I rated Ch 1. I wanted to see where you were going with your version of 'A Succubus Tale'. I like it; it's refreshingly unique, and you have a demonstrated a definite talent for creating quick witted, and sharp characters, namely The Elf.

I look forward to the rest of your tale, where it heads and how well you develop the rest of the cast of characters.

Thanks for sharing your imagination, and writing skills.

GeoD