All Comments on 'Innocent Text Messages Pt. 01'

The funny (and sad) thing is that many women in these situations really do believe it's just "harmless flirting" - whatever the fuck that really means. They've already cocooned their minds in a shell of delusions that allows them to experience the thrill from being desired and chased by someone that's forbidden to them while ignoring the real nature of what is happening or where it could lead: escalating foreplay that inevitably leads to fucking. And yes, this is a form of cheating, just so we're clear.

Good author. Great series. It is actually the fourth installment told from the asshole's viewpoint that really shows what happened, why, and how she resolved it. That last installment really redeems the wife. 5 stars.

My wife came home from a night out with the girls or so she said,I was in bed when she got home,she came upto bed and fell straight asleep, her phone was on the bedside table and it was lighting up every now and then,I reached over for it and opened it up! She hadn't been out with the girls! She had been with some guy! I miss you already said the last text message! Then I scrolled down them and saw that there were videos attached to some of the messages, I was shocked to see my wife bent over being fucked by another man! I watched her sucking his cock swallowing every bit of cum and even saw her getting fucked in her arse

FTDS!

AWESOME!

Oh, very good

Innocent, my ass.

jopstorm1945

A very nice start.

Great story - very well written. Good flow- can’t wait for next part

I find your story's to have a very real feel for the most part... but not mundane. Gripping despite the realism.

Stupid slut !!!

Bitch, tell me everything, right now, and the next lie gets your tongue ripped out!!!

Even your first submission is powerful and emotional. Very high quality right from the start. I'm reading all your stories. Thank you for sharing these with us.

He should have laid it out to her, first block his number from texts and calls, second go to her HR department the next morning and tell them they must reassign her to a job far away from Brian or she is going to resign and lastly ask HR to get Brian in the office and in front of witnesses tell Brian to never contact her again or she will consider it sexual harassment.

good so far. I'd keep her phone and show it to the hospitals HR Dept. the next day and ask for different shifts, firing, etc.

Go see that bastard and take a baseball bat and beat him half to death.

3 stars for this first chapter

Great start. She has already cheated emotionally. Need to read next chapter

BTB kick her ass to curb/ She's fuckinghim r will. Do it now dude

This is exactly how a rational, loving, mentally stable spouse would react to this situation.

Well written, startlingly so.

Javmor's first story, and one of my favorites. There are assholes like Brian all around us. Happily, there are also a lot of Tonys around to sort then out. Wives don't need to push it.

This is great writing. The hook is set now and I got to read chapter two now. Someone is in trouble for sure.

I’m such a fan of how well your writing flows. Smooth as soft butter. The story beginning seems perfectly plausible. All affairs start with flirting. If you could convict on intent alone she has already committed infidelity.

I'm hooked, continue on. Guess we should speculate on the 'affair'. Did she or didn't she? I'm betting did.

And then he's stuck with not knowing the truth about a likely cheating wife. I'd rather know what she's capable of doing now rather than twenty years from now when it's a bit late to start over.

Hope it continues as such.

Setting, scene and dialog all fit and are tightly written. Intro paragraphs were a little stilted. But overall very good lead in.

Those pesky text messages get you every time. She is cheating in his mind, and in reality. Time to find Brian.

Hunt that wife stalking motherfucker down and resize his 'Big Dick' with your hedge trimmers.

It's about God damned time I read a story like this. They're so few and far between here. A Husband who actually has the balls to confront his wife instead of concocting elaborate surveillance or schemes to 'know for sure' and then get even. Nope He gkes straight to the heart of the matter and doesn't mince words.

No Answer

Nothing

None

Meaningless profile name

You are as anonymous as any anon

Do you ever make snide remarks about swingerjoe, reedrichards, lewdslurpydog, or the other deluded profiles who make denigrating comments?

He didn't start thinking of elaborate ways to trap her or save all his money, he confronted her. 5 stars for this so far.

Tony should just use her phone to return a picture of his fist. -OR- Set up a meeting with Brian as Selena to meet her at some local No Tell. Meet him in the parking lot with a ball bat. Impress upon him how much you have enjoyed his emails.

I'm sure there are any number of creative avenues that could be taken to nip this in the bud.

Also. I'm guessing the author will take none of these avenues. Let's read on and see, shall we.

So the little anon troll had to post two idiot comments in a row? We are so thrilled with his insight and so glad to read more drivel. Still a good story, so ignore the idiots.

The guy posting this needs to go over to the Gay Male page and search 'fist fucked' and do himself.

same WIMPY cuck shit from the same DUMB WHORE posting as a man.

SO over your illiterate, cum gobbler ramblings. Best 3 years of your life were probably 4th grade. If you DON'T like the author or his writing, move the fuck on.

OK, no physical cheating happen, yet... But she has already committed emotional CHEATING. Maybe this marriage is still salvageable butttttt she needs some shrink time and a hormone check then a real come to Jesus moment as to desire/declare intent....

He needs to consider a post-nup so he does not loose his girls as even though it's all her doing the court F's-over husbands, hell of a USA society that awards the CHEATING!...

Still love it. Still five. Still a favorite. Very well developed. Love the buildup.

A little bit long winded I thought but shit........I feel like I'm in the frigin room with your characters.....I found another great author on this site, lol..... Don't let your head get too big because I hope you are not 79, I want to read your stories till I'm 79.......bill

I like your imagination. I wish I thought of that when I was writing this story. I may try to use a twist like that in the future.

This is why authors enjoy comments. Thanks for that.

My immediate thought was that his niece left her phone, and he had the wrong one.

I'm very impressed. I see you haven't written anything in awhile but I will look for anything new and I will have to read you other work. Can't wait to read the next two chapters and see what happens. This chapter gets a big 5 from me.

The sheer NUMBER of texts is troubling.

He HAS to insist that she find another way to "get through the night!" If it is possible for her to transfer away from Brian he should insist on that also.

First chapter!

Believable characters in a very realistic situation.

Thanks and please keep writing!

Wonder about the ending

I'm not an English major so I can't explain why, but your writing is so easy to read, and the characters seem so real that they come alive. I would rank you amongst the best with HDK. Keep writing please, and thank you for the stories.

I won't give those 3 steps to the door. Any man who feels he has the right to come on to my wife is going to feel pain. I promise. In this instance, so does the wife.

had better shit and get off the pot, TK U MLJ LV NV

Your reader Mary Ellen is correct. let the other bloke do all the work, getting your wife hot and ready and wet for you.

She comes in the door, fuck her hard.

Then sit back, have a beer, let her cook dinner for you. Fuck her again later if you want.

Let the other guy do the work and then jerk off all alone by himself.

FIVE STARS FOR YOUR STORIES

You, sir, are indeed very fortunate to have such a lovely wife with such a powerful libido!

That she is now seeking elsewhere tells you a lot about you. You are unwilling and incapable of fucking your own wife.

Your lovely wife seeks thrills and joys - yeah, even by "just flirting".

You too should now regain control of her sensuality. Hot and wet when she gets home from text flirting? Why man, you need not waste precious time with irrelevant foreplay.

Great story: keep telling us more, much more about Selene!

Mary Ellen

PS. Happened to me, too... that's why I know so much about you already.

As I understand it, the word means going behind someone's back. Being dishonest with the person.

It doesn't in itself mean extra-anything sex.

Duh

(It means betrayal, being untrue to the person, and what those terms mean are between "partners." And a lotta prunes don't need to weigh in on what's not their business.)

The feelings described were poignant yet realistic. Keep writing.

Granted I'm coming into this series new and know that other chapters are out there I haven't read yet but I'm seriously hoping that Brian gets his. Too many other stories let the poacher get away scott free saying he's just following instincts. BS. When I hunt pheasants I don't shoot at anything that flies, only that which I have a license for. In fact, for too many writers, there is more repercussions for shooting the wrong game than in bagging the wrong wife. It's time to shoot back.

great start, as i have read the rest already. everyone should continue, it gets better

This is not innocent. It's a seduction. She is willingly naive. He is after more, and sees a weakness in her commitment to her husband. There are many ways to be unfaithful and this is one.

First story I've read here on this subject that seemed real to life. His reactions are those many real guys would have: suspicion, anger, yelling. I'll be looking for the continuation.

...and it's nicely written.

The truest line in the whole story is:

"Those texts were an escalating form of foreplay", with the emphasis on escalating. That one sentence is dead-on.

The fact is, to be texting like that at all, her heart and pussy were already in the game. If it had continued, the excitement would also increase, and the fact that they had gotten away with their little secret would have made her think that she could get away with a bigger secret.

If this is what happened to a friend of yours, I wonder if he is still with her? One thing is certain, your friend would have trouble trusting her ever again, especially with a phone. I hate the things myself, and facebook even more.

Your writing ability is very high as well, very clean. It usually doesn't bother me if there are errors in a story, but yours was well done. Can't wait to read Ch2

Wonderful characterization; you do really well with this and it's a pleasure to read. One comment:

This line: "For some reason teenagers think we actually care who kissed whom under the bleachers because she is a total slut." I would tweak it as follows:

"For some reason teenagers think we actually care about who-kissed-whom-under-the-bleachers-because-she's-a-total-slut." This more accurately reflects 1-the way it would be said/spoken, and 2-that "who-kissed-whom-under-the-bleachers-because-she's-a-total-slut" is a fairly standard topic of conversation/criticism of the North American High School Female.

Well done.

I feel a BTB coming before this is over. 5+ Stars

For your first story you did great. The only reason I gave it a 4* in stead of 5* is you just gave one page to your story. Man That Sucks! Finish the story in one release.

That being said I will be looking for you to improve with time.

I'm not a writer nor a critic, I found it entertaining and error free... Good Job.

I see right now (3-20) you already have 91 comments. Different from what is usually posted here, but then similar. To me, well written, clear, lays out the plot, get you interested at the beginning with the text msgs. No mispelling or grammar or word usage mistakes. 5 stars. Going right to Ch. 2 now!

. . . initially because I was turned off by the text message opening. I saw several interesting comments on the second chapter in the sidebar on the LW page and decided to take a look; glad I did. This is written with real emotion, quite well done. I'll move on to the second post and see whee it goes when hubby wakes up. I understand hospitals are hard up for experienced nurses but I can see two getting fired if hubby brings this batch of text messages to the head of administration.

Good job Javmor.

Keep it going !

For the reality and the writing. Now gonna get Chapter 2...

I know it's your first story, but what other 1 page chapters have you read?

Good start to a story that has several other 'LIT' stories with this type of beginning plot, but e-mails are the usually the damning initial evidence of the 'cheating'. I look forward to how you make this tale original to you! You seem to write well, and the story flow is smooth. Thanks, Javmor79! Dan

The story has a very "real" feel to it. You do a very good job of painting the picture of the scene and evoking the emotions of the moment with your words. You make the story very believable. My only advice is to get a proofreader or editor to catch those little errors like missing words that tend to break the flow of the story and divert the reader's attention. That would take it from Good to Very Good (or even Outstanding, depending on how it finishes up).

All in all, a very good start! I eagerly await the "rest of the story" as Paul Harvey used to say.

Andy

More please. Soon please. This is a goodie.

The story, if can call one. It starts with the phone, finishes with the phone. Other than that it means nothing. Just some crap, that someone thinks is good

"Selene, who's Brian?"

The question came out in a surprisingly clear, even tone. I even sounded calm. It was an exact contradiction to what I felt though. It hung in the air as her lips trembled.

"Ummm, he's just a guy that I work with. Why?"

Not exactly an innocent response. Maybe we shouldn't expect her to immediately admit the flirting, but why are her lips trembling if the relationship is so innocent?

This DIDN'T need to be broken up in to chapters!

Very good story. It is extremely realistic. There are rarely smoking guns in life thought that phone was pretty hot. We all could find ourselves with this type of doubt in our lives at sometime. I am impressed with the story and the skill this author displays. Good job so far!.

A very nice start to the story and well written.

The only gripe would be that the chapter is short and personally I prefer stories that are either complete or at least the chapters comes in rapid succession.

Thank you for sharing

because of their length need to be cut up in chapters, this one did not. I hate cliff hangers when I have no idea whether they will ever finish. A hint to new writers, it can take a week or more from the time of submission until posting. I made this mistake on my first story and got blasted. at the very least give a clue in the forward when to expect the next chapter or better yet, finish the damn story.

Nice tale. A prologue of things to come? Keep writing. Lets get to the bottom of this adventure. Five Stars

This story should be at 4.6 or higher at least. Kudos on good job. Looking forward to the sequels of this story. I hope to see many many and many more of your stories posted.

Thanks

Well written with a good storyline. Looking forward to the next chapter. Thanks for sharing.

Well done, so far.The tension was well maintained. The woman has already emotionally cheated on him. The physical cheating is soon to come, especially since she's now seen 'the big dick' no matter what her initial reaction to it. I'm surprised he didn't hit her with her response in the text message at the beginning of the story. When asked why she didn't come over, she responded to Brian "Bcuz my husband would wonder where I am". Not, "I'm a married woman. I wont cheat on my husband". It's your story, but I'd to see some immediate & direct response to this situation...and keep the bitch's phone for evidence.

I gave your first page a five and here's why!

1. Like Ohio said you got us off to a fast start, no preliminary bull shit. You jumped right in. Regrettably something I do too much of-the bull shit I mean.

2. Grammar was clear and precise; easy to read no mistakes.

3. Sounds genuinely interesting.

4. Like another commenter said, your guy didn't go hide in the closet to wait, watch, and see. He went right after the problem.

5. I gave you a five up front like free candy! An incentive. Don't flub this us!

I have warnings:

1. Don't Just Plain Bob us. You got us started; now see it all the way through to the end. I don't want to make up my own ending. I'll want yours.

2. Don't take months between segments.

3. No Mustangs!

4. No mafia friends, exploding cars, chemical sprays in the uterus, or gun play.

5. Please this is a regular guy; he's not a SEAL, not an Afghanistan or Iraq veteran with years of martial arts training.

6. Remember he has two little kids; no matter how bad it could get don't BTB!

7. He doesn't run away!

8. You're not Matt Moreau; the guy has a regular pecker!

Pay the hospital administrator a visit and show him the picture and texts.

Sexual misconduct in the workplace is a firing offense.

Maybe not as satisfying as breaking Brians nose but not going to jail is worth it if there is a divorce.

THIS!!

That Brian gets a punch in the face for trying to fuck another man's wife in chapter 2.

... but only because you first timers often never finish the story. Also, I really don't care much for multi-part stories. Can't shake the idea that you're making it up as you go along.

To encourage a new writer and compliment his first effort. The reader can put himself into the mind of the protagonist. I can't help wondering how the rest of the story avoids a formulaic direction. Wife in deeper than naughty flirting, cheating and deceiving. A meatier and more interesting story, but told and told. Nothing else has happened. How do you even write another interesting chapter? I'll be reading.

Very good writing don't see any need for corrections , looking forward to the next chapters please don't leave us hanging

oh your one of those writers that only send in part of the sor!!!! end of part 1 of comment but stay tuned Dagoatmandavid said it Cya later

I hope you don't turn him into a little coward and have him believe her bullshit. She is cheating, not physically Yet! But this is the build up to it. And it's been going on long enough that she is close to going all the way. Not much respect for her husband. So far the story is very plausible. Hope chapter 2 is out soon.

I never read Chapter 1 stories from a new writer because they often are never finished. I read a couple of comments on this one and saw your favorites list and decided to give you a chance. Anyone who likes good LW stories should check out your favorites list. You have got every good LW author! It is clear you have done your homework.

The chapter felt like an Ohio story. It was very intense and felt like husband caught the wife before she got into an unforgivable situation. I didn't know that 6 word pages boiled down to one page on this site. I look forward to the next two chapters. I am not a writer but I think I know what is good. Even the best writers have problems finishing the story. Good luck! Thanks for your work!

Good start. I'm intrigued for the next part.

I hope that you can deliver the "goods" (ha, ha)!

I'd say the fact that you don't have very many cheap shots from the anon crowd indicates this is an above average story. I have often wondered just what the LW readers really wanted and from the comments on your story it seems forgiveness ain't it. Thanks for the enjoyable read.

Great start. Agree that it starts hard and stays tense to the 'break!' I am more of a fan of holding back and finding out what a person will do on his/her own, but I understand the 'react and hope it changes things' approach. Realistically, I suspect each works in SOME instances, and DOESN'T in others! Each option makes fundamental (and different) assumptions about how you manage 'your side' of a relationship.

EZ 5* (so far)

A very compelling story filled with normal human emotions perfectly described. I am looking forward to the next installment. Thank you for writing this!

The beauty of this story is that I have no idea where it will go. I am in full suspense mode and can't wait to see the remaining two parts. If we take the author at his word, she more than likely hasn't cheated. Is it an easy fix? Could be. He caught her before it went too far, she learns her lesson, realizes what she could have lost, they are stronger in the end. Does he hold this grudge and it leads to the destruction of their marriage? It could. Some stories have explored this theme where the wife didn't cheat but it still became an issue that led to divorce. The disrespect, the distrust ... These are not minor things. Does he go out and do something stupid? He might. The possibilities seem plentiful. Bravo!

I think you did very well for a first-time author. For a very short story, it packed some punch. I felt the emotion, and thought the dialogue and confrontation were credible. I know a couple who broke up over this exact thing, despite the fact that it was pretty clear nothing physical had happened....yet. A couple things stood out for me that could be improved on.

First, a couple of clever quips, while appreciated, were a little out of place with the tone of the story, which was stark and real. Second, the protag's description of his reaction (emasculated that his wife desired another man, etc..) wasn't really supported by the texts depicted in the story at that point. Yes, it was flirty, but she never texted that she wanted him or anything. In fact, she rebuffed him, however playfully. Perhaps more damning language from her would justify the protag's harsh reaction and also make reconciliation that much more difficult, if that's the way you're going (conversely, it would make divorce that much more justified).

Good luck, and happy writing.

It's a good story, especially for a first effort. I think I got hammered on my first submission. I would suggest proof reading two or three times with an hour or two in between each one. You built up good tension and have lain the ground work for a nice second chapter, which I hope to see soon.

that set the stage for the tale. Nicely done and I am looking forward to the "...the rest of the story.."

Be looking for the rest. Hopefully won't be long wait.

Not so innocent texting when he sends picture of his dick - he at least, is serious.

Would imagine wife will not be working with him again and will request imediate transfer.

As others have said it needs to be longer, other than that I like where this is headed. This is your first submission? Damn I can't wait to read more stories from you.

You maintained the tension from beginning to end. Nothing was included that didn't need to be included to establish what was going on and to feel the emotions form both players.

Why so many writers insist on filling us in on all the physical statistics (her, 36C, me 8 inches and thick) and background to their high school years is beyond me. It RARELY adds anything to the story to know all that crap. Nothing is missed by skipping it either.

If this is a first effort, congratulations. You deserve to be in the LW club. Looking forward to the remaining chapters/parts.

Its too bad he didn't nail the lying whore in the cocksucker when he sailed her phone. Then he could have said that she'd had Brian's Dick to her lips when he hauls her ass to divorce court. Good start.

Good tension, real emotions. This should have been one chapter, but I think you realize that now. Keep writing