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He gave an amiable nod. "Great match, Katie. You're really special, with a bod like that. You'll go far. Call me out anytime for a drink -- if you do drink. You look like you're into all that healthy diet stuff, so maybe you don't. Guys like me can't keep up with your stamina, that's for sure. Ha!" And with a friendly smile and another nod, he walked off, whistling.
Katie just stood there, utterly bewildered. That man, who just under an hour ago had been face to face with her in a brutal struggle for physical, mental and sexual superiority... had that man just invited her out for a drink? And praised her? Like a real sportsman?
She chuckled. Then she laughed. And she was still laughing hard, with tears coming out of her eyes, when Penny found her a short while later.
- COMMENTS
Anonymousabout 10 years agoI started out reading the Inanna series, but quickly realized that wasn't my sort of story at all. It tended to be too ...uh, pomp and circumstance? At any rate, I tried this story and felt more at ease with the way it spoke to the reader.
(Another part about that story was the awkwardness of some of the names. I realized you were trying to use a myth based story line, so many of the names were probably from that myth too, but as I mentioned to another writer, awkward names tend to trip up the story and make readers focus on that than the story itself. However if she had just added a helper at the beginning of the story that either described how to say the name, or to define the name, makes the awkward more familiar, and thus keep the reader reading.)
Truly, not my cup of tea. Still, the point is your ability to write and as far as that goes, you wrote a very entertaining story with action and dialogue that kept me reading until the end to see how things all turned out.
I'll have to keep reading to see more examples of your stories are just as well written.
