All Comments on 'Late Night Beach'

by Zraii

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jorgejmjjorgejmjabout 12 years ago
"I"

I enjoyed the story. Writing in the first person you need to watch the use I as a referance. Look at a restructure of the sentence. The story has the potential to be great not just good. You should go back and take a fresh look at it and struggle with each sentence with the goal of getting around the "I".

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